It’s Pay-it-Forward AND Pray-it-Forward Time!

Mentor – a trusted guide, coach, role model, counselor

I don’t know where or who I would be were it not for the mentors in my life from a very EARLY age. Since I was “early” in getting married (at 17) and “early” to have a baby (one year later at 18), I needed all the help I could get. I was so in love, but I was also so insecure and inexperienced when it came to every day challenges and struggles. Quite frankly, inexperienced in life….period. And, each challenge and struggle confirmed my ongoing mental monologue “What in the world am I doing?”

I needed someone older, wiser, experienced and confident to help me navigate some of those never-ending challenges. Someone I could call and ask, "How do you do this?" or "Have you ever experienced that?" without being judged. God was so faithful to give me two strong women who paved the way for me to become a confident wife and mom. Those women were my mother and mother-in-law. How many times did I call them and ask about “this and that”? Since I was the youngest of my friends to get married, I sure couldn’t call those girls for advice. They didn't understand breastfeeding or a baby's high fever. My “moms” were living, breathing gifts from God who were sent to a gal who desperately needed real-life answers and real-life prayer. They gave me both.

Through the years, God was faithful to bring so many other wonderful and wiser Christian women who graciously mentored me. They led me by example. They shared valuable truths on how to be a dedicated wife, manage a career, the must-haves of mothering and most importantly … how to experience an authentic, personal relationship with the Lord.

It’s been my turn now for many years to pay it forward and pray it forward as I have mentored many younger women in my own circle of influence. Some women were older than me and I mentored them in their relationship with Jesus Christ. Some of those gals were searching for Mr. Happily-Ever-After. A few were transitioning from newlywed bliss to marriage-plus-career reality. And others needed sound advice on how to raise their kids while trying to stay sane. And, now, many are widows who need help navigating their life through singleness. Oh the lessons I learned in the process that I was able to share with them what NOT to do and what to do so they wouldn’t make the same mistakes I did.

In both seasons, being mentored and being a mentor, I’ve learned so much from smart, hard-working, gracious and tenderhearted women, who, just like me, still need godly advice every now and then. What would happen if we embraced each season of life looking to mentor others with the same excitement and tenacity we’d expect from a woman who mentored us?

Mentoring is for each season of life. Maybe you’ve been looking for a godly woman to come alongside you. Start with praying for your soon-to-be mentor. Even though you don’t know her yet, God does. She may be older and wiser and she knows what it is to face life's challenges. Then, be willing to mentor someone else. Your gifts and talents can be used to be a blessing to a woman who’s also longing for a mentoring relationship.

It’s Mother’s Day weekend and what better time to reflect upon those women who imparted life into you – via birthing you in the natural or the spiritual and the everyday course of life. Now…go and pay it forward and pray it forward to some young girl, teenager or woman who needs a loving, caring and devoted mentor. Thank God for their good influence on you. Regardless of your age or stage in life, mentoring is always available to you!

Hebrews 13:7 “Remember your leaders, those who have spoken God’s word to you. Think about the impact of their lives, and imitate their faith.”

1 Timothy 4:12 “Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.”

What Kind of Influencer Are You?

A few days ago my daughter told me about an unfortunate incident at the tennis courts in their community. A young man was "hogging" one of the courts and refused to allow other residents in the area to play. Typically, there is a one-hour game play, and when others are waiting for the court, the players let others take their place after an hour. Not in the case of this young man. He was adamant that he didn't have to quit, and his nasty attitude was seen by many people wanting to play. Before long, the father of that young man showed up and, likewise, his attitude was even more offensive than the son's. Obviously, the young man was influenced by his disagreeable father. Like father -- like son.

Let's think about what kind of an INFLUENCER we are to those around us. Do we influence others to be better, act better and live better lives by the way they see us living ours?

Here's a way we can measure: We go throughout our day and people get to know us and they see how we treat those around us....from our children, to our spouse, to our co-workers, to the cashier at a store -- we're being watched in how we act (and react) in situations of calm, as well as those of stress. Do we act entitled or are we kind, generous and compassionate, whether we focus on THEM and give them our undivided attention (put down those cell phones!), or not. And also....if we're meeting someone for a lunch or appointment, are we showing up on time? Do we respect the time of others? All of that life example matters.....and it speaks volumes.
.
Abraham Lincoln noted that "actions speak louder than words." Even his words, among the most eloquent in political history, would not have been effective if his life had contradicted his words. We don't have to be high profile, in the spotlight, or in a noteworthy position, but we do have to live in such a way that our life illustrates our faith. And our faith is best spoken by our actions.

Excellence is a biblical imperative: "And you, yourself, must be an example to them by doing good works of every kind. Let everything you do reflect the integrity and seriousness of your teaching." (Titus 2:7)

Little and big eyes are watching us daily. Our lives represent a BOOK of manners, courtesy, honor, integrity and character that others need to see and become. What does your book look like?