Saving the Ones We Love the Most

We all have inbred instincts to save the ones we love the most. We are passionate about making sure our babies don’t touch a hot stove and they look both ways before crossing a street. We ensure they wear their coats in the cold winter days and we apply sunscreen in the blistering heat of the summer. We would go into any burning building to save their lives from a devastating fire, or into the water to save them from drowning. But, what kind of true grit do we possess for our children and grandchildren that will save them from the enemy of their souls?

I hear parents express immense concern about the negative influences their children may encounter in school, on social media, the entertainment world of screen and music, and particularly the divisive, hateful rancor of negativity that many people display. Parents wonder how their children will grow up with purpose, dignity, integrity, respect, and self-esteem when THAT and THOSE are their influencers.

But, really, WHO are their most significant influencers? The fact is there is no one or no-thing that should ever supersede a parent’s responsibility and their own leading-by-example. Let me speak boldly here. Your children will learn to love or hate, be respectful or disrespectful, wise or foolish, not by the character of their friends’ families, or those pseudo families they watch on TV or Hollywood, but by the family in their house. May I submit to you that your sons and daughters will be far more influenced by their teachers, coaches, 4-H, FFA, scouts or church group leaders? I don’t feel my character was molded by those in public office or in the entertainment world, but I did learn respect, hard work, and generosity from my Dad and perseverance, faith and resilience from my Mom. My Sunday School teachers, Vacation Bible School leaders and Christian Camp counselors modeled to me how to relate to the God of the Bible in my everyday life.

Actually, should those in the public spotlight conduct themselves in an honorable way with utmost integrity? Absolutely. However, it is not the responsibility of the President, Oprah, Dr. Phil, Miss America, the NFL, or the neighbor next door, to set the example of moral conduct. It is not the government’s responsibility to ensure children have a good example. It is our responsibility, as American citizens and Christians, to ensure that we lead our youth in modeling what is right, good, honorable, and true. One good, God-fearing, respectful football coach can do far more to shape the hearts and minds of teenage boys than a professional athlete. If we want to make a difference, let’s stop worrying about the moral example of others and let us take an active role in our classrooms, churches, youth groups and programs, sports teams, and their other extracurricular activities. Being cheerleaders, advisers and overseers of God’s gifts (our children and grandchildren) is our calling and mission. Those children are our gifts from God and what we do to instill a love for God, their fellow man and country is our gift back to God.

“Friends and fellow Americans, your success as a family -- our success as a nation -- depends not on what happens in Washington D.C., but on what happens inside your house.” I pray these wise words of Barbara Bush will resonate with us. Our nation has always and will always depend on the moral fiber of our families, nothing more, nothing less. God bless, America, and may America bless God!

Being an Influencer

Okay....this is longer than my usual "long", but it describes major influencers in my life. When I come to Tulsa, I squeeze in as much as possible because there are so many precious friends and family here. Yesterday was no exception. First was attending mass at my home parish and sitting beside my Tulsa “family” who mean the world to me. My godson brought us all together when he was a very sick newborn. My husband and I fell in love with this family long before his birth, but it was his little precious and vulnerable life that cemented us all together. Isn’t it amazing how what seems to be the worst of times, brings out the best in people and the best of times? Owen is 13 now so it’s been 13 years of watching God perform miracle after miracle in his life. Since my husband passed away, Owen has taken his place beside me in church and he still holds my hand and wraps his arms around me with abandon. Be still my heart! I was thrilled to have lunch with them and seeing the two youngest in their costumes for Trunk or Treat that followed. This family has been amazing influencers in my life.

After church and before lunch, I made a couple of quick visits to see two amazing “older” women. My first visit was to see Margaret, the mother of my brother-in-law, She lives in a skilled nursing facility, If you need a pick-me-up, go see her. I walked in her room and she was beaming from ear-to-ear and excited to tell me “I’m 96 years old now! Just look at these paintings on my walls. I painted them all!” Margaret is a dear, optimistic, light-hearted friend that as long as I’ve known her, her outgoing, and warm personality made me feel loved. She influenced me.

Then I headed over to spend time with my mother-in-law. I took her dinner the night before and we caught up then, but yesterday I savored our time together once again. She's gone through a lot physically, but now that she lives with Karen, my husband’s sister, she's become stronger and filled with so much vitality. She boasted “I’ve gained five pounds!” And that says a lot! I can’t begin to tell you how much she has influenced my life -- the most of which are her prayers for us. I asked her “What are you going to do today?” She quickly responded, “I’ve got lots of calls to make!” She has a list of people she calls to encourage. She is sure not done yet. She’ll be 96 on Wednesday.

Lastly, I made my way to another dear friend and mentor. Oh, how I love this precious saint, Sister Marie Pierre. After 50+ years of ministry, she retired and lives in a small space at St. Joseph's Monastery but it is everything she hoped for in this season of her life. A few months ago she had a pretty bad fall and had to have hip surgery. I was shocked to see that she was waiting at the door with her walker for me when I arrived. She wasn’t setting any records, but she was up and moving. Another nun waited with her and she asked: “Are you a teacher?” I replied, “Yes, I am, but I’m also one of Sister Pierre’s children.” We made each other cry as we shared sweet memories, and about our future....getting to graduate to heaven. We talked about how our loved ones and the saints and Jesus are cheering us on to the finish line. I could tell she is longing for the day when she'll go home, but in the meantime, sitting at her feet, feeling God's presence and His peace all around her, is the place to be. God continues to use her to touch our lives. She has MANY children -- of course, not biologically, but she sure had a hand in raising many of us in the ways we should go.

Why do I go into so much detail about my life and share it on social media? One, it will be forever an archive to remind me of those people who passed my way. I’m quite sure they were all a part of God’s Master Plan for my life. Placing value on those people and acknowledging them as precious and valuable makes them matter in the grand scheme of God’s almighty handiwork. I love to give credit where credit is due. Each teacher, mentor, encourager, family member, friend, and even casual acquaintance are strategic in God’s wisdom to co-partner with Him. I am so grateful for those who helped “make” me.

The point is to embrace God’s plan AND people that come into our lives – there’s a reason for them all. I’m so thankful that mine has made me purposeful in my mission and determination to finish strong. Perhaps you’re thinking of your own life and those who have contributed to who you are today. Maybe phone them or pay them a visit to let them know how thankful you are for them. Why do I go into so much detail about my life and share it on social media? One, it will be archived to remind me of those people who partnered with God to fulfill His Master Plan in my life. Acknowledging them is giving credit where credit is due. Each teacher, mentor, encourager, family member, friend, and even casual acquaintance are strategically placed in our lives by God. I am so grateful for those who helped “make” me.

The point is to embrace God’s plan AND people that come into our lives. There is a reason for them all. I’m so thankful that mine has made me purposeful in my mission and determination to finish strong. Perhaps you’re thinking of your own life and those who have contributed to who you are today. Maybe phone them or pay them a visit to let them know how thankful you are for them.