Hammer on Pause to Live With No Regrets

Some of life's greatest lessons come from first hand experience. And those experiences teach us the "I wish I had" or "I'm glad I did" moments. You know those "living WITH regrets" or "living with NO regrets". The latter on both of those statements is truly the best way to go. Believe me, I've known both. Those times we "miss it" are surely those times we learn from the most. Life is so short and making the most of everything we can when the opportunities arise, not only gives us sweet memories, but it makes for deepening our relationships with each other.

A couple of days ago I divulged my news on FB that my home sold in Tulsa and I'll be moving to Texas. "Hammer down" was the term I used for the non-stop mode of getting my home all packed up before the movers get there next Tuesday. With limited sleep and many hours a day of relentless crunching the "have to's", it would have been easy and understandable by my granddaughter, to miss being with her this year on her birthday. Nevertheless, my motto "Live With No Regrets" kept me grounded on what's most important.

My granddaughter's 15th birthday was yesterday. It is rare that I/we ever missed one of our grandchildren's birthdays. I've told how our family always makes a big deal of each other's birthdays. Alexia knew my moving schedule, so she didn't expect me, but how could I NOT be there to celebrate my girl when she's only 3-1/2 hours away? So, at 5:20 am, I hit the road. While driving, I called to wish her happy birthday and I told her how much I wish I were there for her and that we would make up for the time lost. That was just before I arrived at her home. She came out of the room, and all cameras were on her as she saw me. Oh, sweet surprise. Not being one that can usually be surprised, I surprised her and said, "I surprised you. I surprised you. I wouldn't miss my girl's birthday. Are you kidding me?"

That effort enabled me to be a part of a day of fun surprises and adventures. First we headed to our 5th year in a row, lunch at Neiman Marcus' Mariposa Restaurant for her favorite broth soup and popovers with strawberry butter. Then after a little shopping at Willow Bend, it was off to Grapevine Mall, where another surprise awaited Alexia. She was just 5 years old the last time she went to one of her favorite restaurants, Rainforest Cafe. She "remembered" being so scared as a little girl when the lightning and thunder would come and the animals would roar. This time she treasured those memories then and the memories made yesterday.

It was topped off by Larry, Payton and Will surprising her by meeting us there. Then it was home with a house filled with kids from her church's youth group to surprise her. Laughing, running, playing music,going to the park, watching movies, playing games -- all a part of celebrating life. Wonderful gifts from her friends: money, new shoes from Payton, tickets to the Carrie Underwood Concert next Tuesday night. The biggest surprises of all were Larry & Staci's gift of tickets to "Phantom of the Opera" -- a dream she's had for a long time, and Will's gift of the Phantom mask pendant/necklace. With this outpouring of life, I know Alexia felt loved and celebrated. And, I was here to see it all and be a part of yet another year of thanksgiving and appreciation. Now, I'm hitting the road back to Tulsa -- hammer down -- finishing up this elephant with memories that will last my lifetime!

Name Calling -- But If It Fits, OWN It!

Machines, Rock Stars, Beast Mode, Tough Cookies......those are names my sweet daughter, Shawntel Wuerch and I were called a few weeks ago as we packed up their entire home for their move to Texas. We were relentless in making sure the precious items were padded and packed into just-the-right-sized, room-named boxes. We laughed a lot along the way, sometimes because of silly antics and sometimes because we were so dog-tired. We made some really sweet memories and our "bond" became even stronger. When the movers showed up, they simply loaded all the furniture and all the perfectly packed boxes we had packed.

This week, since Monday, we were in machine-mode again, as the movers showed up in three huge moving vans. We were prepared for them, with rooms named and places all set for the multitude of items to go. We directed them, opened the amazingly-packed boxes by those "expert" packers and distributed the items throughout the house. Sweet and precious family friend, Kristina Vinberg, came from Seattle to help us conquer. Honestly, as many of you know, big moves across the country, or across town, are not for the faint-hearted, but with the tenacity of three determined women, we're getting the job done. Sounds like a commercial for 3-Women and 3-Trucks Moving Services! LOL!

This little example of strong women is really a story of God's amazing grace, of His care and love for us. We don't quit when the going gets tough. We persevere to the finish line. We're not at the finish line just yet, but we'll get there! Proverbs 31:17 "She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks."

Last night, we breathed a sign of relief for all that we had accomplished, even though there are what seems to be tons more of boxes yet to be opened. But, we'll get it done, because like the girl in this photo, life may throw us some fast balls (gotta work with speed), curve balls -- left and right (aching legs and feet) -- but we've got bats, and God has taught us how to swing. So....batter up, Strong Women! It does fit....so let's own it!

And That's The Way It Goes!

My mother-in-law, who has always been known for her wit, called me a couple of nights ago and she was on a roll. Typically, it is just a "check-in" call to see how things are going, but this night she was recalling some stories of her childhood and how she and her brother got into mischief. And that story led to another story. There are times when she'll repeat stories that I've heard dozens of times before, but this night, they were all fresh ones. She told me how the floods were coming quickly in Winnipeg (Canada) in the early 50s and how she had to pack a little suitcase and send her boy, my husband (then 4 years old), away to a friend's home so he would be protected. She said he stood in the driveway with his little coat on and holding his little suitcase....looking so sad and forlorn. I can visualize that picture now.

Mom finds great joy in talking about the past because she has such sweet memories of when times were tough, but God brought them through each and every time. The floods came, but they had the good sense to move their best furniture to higher ground before their home was under water.

Now, here we are in 2016 and. if taken at face value, it may seem we're in such a perilous and concerning time. When we listen to the news reports or to a voice that just called us on our phone, or when we've read the latest updates on social media and take them just as they are, it may seem as if the best escape is for God to open up a window above us in the sky and snatch us away to a better place beyond the clouds.

Mom has a habit of saying "And that's the way it goes". That's kind of the way she has looked at life -- when she could be down because her dear husband passed away and left her a widow some twenty years ago or that she can't get around as good as she once could.....she just patiently and calmly says, "And that's the way it goes."

Here's the deal -- we shouldn't be down about the way things appear. Let's don't lose hope based on what our news anchor or our social media feed or our great-aunt Lillie may be trying to tell us about the gloom and the doom and the brokenness of this world. All of this is not too much for God to handle. Whatever decade or political year or tough year it was, and is today, literally, whatever is upon us, will never stump God, or leave Him wondering what in the world to do next. I'm quite sure none of the stuff is enough to make God throw his hands up in surrender.

Psalm 147:5 says ".....He is abundant in strength; His understanding is infinite." ! Samuel 2:3 "For the LORD is a God of knowledge, and with Him actions are weighed." Jeremiah 29:11 "'For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity; plans to give you a future and a hope." Psalm 27:1

"The LORD is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear? The LORD is the defense of my life; Whom shall I dread?"

Mom has it right. "That's the way it goes" -- trusting, leaning on and depending on our KNOW-IT-ALL God, is the way to live a calm, peaceful, and assured life.

Seasons Change PURPOSEFULLY

Day 134 of Photo Inspirations -- Seasons Change PURPOSEFULLY

My photo inspirations today come as a result of spending time recently with my sweet cousin and her husband, Mary Ellen & Charles Snow. They are starting a new chapter in their "life book" -- from their Tulsa "roots", where Charles served in ORU's Faculty of Theology & Ministry for over 25 years, as well as serving on staff with David Wilkerson's ministry and then pastoring in Fort Worth, TX.  They're heading back to Texas, where Mary Ellen and I both grew up.  She and my sister were "besties" back in their high school and college days.

As Mary Ellen walked me through their beautiful home in Tulsa, Charles was going through and cleaning out his desk.  He said, "40 years of collections in there!"  They are packing for their move and all the excess will be in an estate sale in a couple of weeks.  That beautiful mandolin up on a shelf WILL go with them.  Too many sweet memories attached to the mandolin that Charles played with a musical group.

It's not easy handling transitions of this magnitude.  Saying "good bye" to friends that are here, as well as so many treasures that they've collected from their ministry travels abroad.  But, they know it's time.  They know their seasons have changed.  I reminded them of what I told others that we held estate sales for.  "You were blessed to have such beautiful treasures for so many years.  You made lots of memories with those treasures.  But now, it's time to 'pay those treasures and memories' forward.  Now others will be able to cherish those treasures and make memories of their own".

I love this couple so much for how they've given their lives to serving God and leading many people to Him, but I love them because they're family.  Mary Ellen is the daughter of my Mom's sister, Shad Ruth.  Aunt Shad was the first one who bought me a pair of slacks.  Oh, what a huge BREAKTHROUGH in my world. LOL!  

As we were walking through their house, Mary Ellen opened the door of a closet and exclaimed, "Oh, Donna.  Would you want this quilt?"  I asked, "Did Grandma make it?"  And she replied, "Either Aunt Lillie Mae or Grandma did!"   I became the recipient of a treasure.  I brought it home and opened the sealed, plastic, zippered bag and there were two twin quilts inside.  And I had a flashback.  For just a period of time, after my Dad had passed away, my Mom lived with my aunt and the two of them slept on the twin beds in her room.  Those are the quilts from those twin beds -- at least 50 years ago.   I am elated to possess such a treasure.  And oh how blessed I am to know that our lives are about seasons, and with each one -- whether in our childhood, youth, married, children and grandchildren, God purposely knows each season.....prepares the way for us to not just survive each one.....but to thrive and flourish in each one.  Yes, Mary Ellen, Charles AND I will continue to thrive and flourish on this side of heaven.....until our new season will be an ETERNAL one!  Accepting the seasons and their changes is part of the Master Plan -- realizing He has our best interests at heart sure makes the journey be even sweeter.

Great Granny = Sweet Memories

Day 66 of Photo Inspirations -- Great Granny = Sweet Memories
When my kids come back to Tulsa, paying a visit to Great Granny is always on the itinerary!  I loved it, yesterday, when we stopped by to see her.   Payton and Alexia will be in a 3-Day Speech & Debate Competition starting next Thursday, so they presented their speeches to Great Granny.

They both did such a great job making Granny smile, and laugh, so big.  And in her wisdom, she offered them sweet compliments and great critique -- just what they needed to hear.  Granny listened to many speeches in her 52+ years of marriage to Dad, a Pastor, so she knew just the right words to encourage them.  She had had a lot of practice.

Alexia had her best friend with her at Granny's and she gave her a guided tour around Granny's house -- showing her lots of photos from their baby and kid years.   Just before we left, they had to show Canaan "their" toy closet.

Actually, it's been the "toy closet" for all of the great grandkids -- all 8 of them -- from my 22 year old grandson to our youngest 20 month old niece.  The same toys that each and every one of them played with -- with the exception of a few new ones for the newest great grandchild.

There's something to be said for living in one home for over 25 years -- the home that she and dad moved to when their previous home was demolished by a tornado.  This has been the perfect home for Mom and Dad, and when Dad graduated to heaven, now Mom's perfect home.  The toys that the kids pulled out are the same ones that each grandkid played with or pulled through the house.  How great it is that some things don't change -- and some things you can always count on to be there for you.

Great Granny is the family icon for stability and consistency.  She has her fixed routines and her "ways" that are unchangeable.  We gave up many years ago on trying to get her to conform to our way of thinking.  But, when I think about it, I'm glad she hasn't changed.  She learned it from the ONE who sets the best example of parenting and HE NEVER changes.  He's always there for our visits with Him.  He's always ready to listen to us, to celebrate our victories and to comfort us in our failures.  He is consistent in His love for us, even when we just don't "get it right".  But He is there to applaud our successes, cheer us up when we're disappointed, and give us great critique when we miss the mark.  And, by the way, He loves us so much that He's probably got OUR pictures all over HIS house.

Make Lots of Memories

I took Payton and Alexia to see their Great Granny today. When their home at Lake Keystone, OK was destroyed by a devastating tornado 24 years ago, my young son, who sold real estate at the time, found Mom & Dad a lovely home that backs to Page Belcher Golf Course. It's been a precious place of making many family memories. I remember Papaw (Great Granny’s husband – my sweet husband’s Dad), taking my oldest grandson out to the golf course with a little club to learn to hit the ball – at age two, we envisioned him being a pro-golfer one day – LOL. Of course, this is the only home that Payton and Alexia have ever known as Great Granny's, so it was so fun to watch them today, looking at the photos she has of them throughout her house.

And they were so pleased at how much they’ve grown, because they were able to guage their growth by being able to reach the chains on the ceiling fan or the doorway ceiling to her kitchen – which, now, is quite easy for Payton (Alexia still needs a couple more inches). And, of course, Granny gave them each $5. Her and Papaw were always known for giving a few dollars to the grandkids each time they came to visit.

I thought about the sweet memories we have all had of our precious loved ones, and those simple things -- the things that money can't buy -- that made them so valuable to us. The value of memories really does increase over time. I know it has for me. When we’re young and so busy raising our families, giving so much of our time to just making it through the days filled with so many activities and events, we don’t think about tomorrow! But, I promise you, you'll be so grateful that you savor the moments, embrace the details and cherish the times. How very quickly time goes by, and how very quickly our families grow up and out of our immediate attention. The trivial times in life become such priceless times, tomorrow. Embrace the times. Make lots of memories – tomorrow comes very quickly, and tomorrow what you did yesterday, will be the greatest treasure you own.