Love Means Saying "You're Forgiven"!

"Forgiveness is unlocking the door to set someone free, and realizing you were the prisoner."

Yesterday, my post was about apologizing, saying AND meaning those words, "I'm so sorry!" Today's is the reciprocating action.....being quick to forgive. How is that possible when we may have been hurt so deeply and their "I'm sorry" just isn't enough?

I've read many incredible stories about people who forgave in the most heart-wrenching situations, especially when forgiving would seem so unnecessary on a human level.

On October 2, 2006, Charles Carl Roberts walked into an Amish school in rural Pennsylvania and shot ten young school girls, killing five of them. On the same day of the shooting, a grandfather of one of the girls who had died, told other relatives, "We must not think evil of this man." Another member of the community visited the shooter's family that day to comfort them and offer forgiveness. Dozens more attended his funeral and offered to give financial support to his widow. One member of the community later said, "I don't think there's anybody here that wants to do anything but forgive and not only reach out to those who have suffered a loss, but to reach out to the family of the man who committed these acts."

The truth about forgiveness is that it is not a natural response and it isn’t for the person we’re forgiving. It’s for us. I heard it quoted: "Unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die." Unwillingness to forgive eats away at our hearts and souls, while forgiveness frees us. No greater forgiver was Jesus -- Who after the lies, rejections, beatings, denials and pain, said "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do."

When we have been hurt, we face the same challenge that those who we've hurt faced. Will we respond with kindness, compassion and forgiveness? And, will forgiving become a way of life for us? The Apostle Paul said, "Be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving one another as God has forgiven you in Christ." Ephesians 4:32. Sure seems like a tall order, but one that comes with sweet rewards. We can move on with our life, have freedom from the pain of the past, enjoy greater happiness in the present and greater health and well-being. The fact is love mean saying "You're forgiven!" We may not forget, but we are at least free from the burden of unforgiveness. It’s not that we dismiss the pain but it does mean we recognize that even our greatest wounds and deepest pain will one day be transformed into beauty by our God who wastes nothing.

Try a Little Kindness

Day 304 of Photo Inspirations -- Try a Little Kindness
Remember Glen Campbell's song from the 70's --  "Try a Little Kindness"?
If you see your brother standing by the road,
With a heavy load from the seeds he sowed.
And if you see your sister falling by the way,
Just stop and say you're goin' the wrong way.
You've got to try a little kindness, yes, show a little kindness.
Yes, shine your light for everyone to see.
And if you'll try a little kindness, and you'll overlook the blindness,
Of the narrow minded people on the narrow minded streets.

I was reminded of that song yesterday when I walked into Wal-Mart and passed the Redbox kiosk with this $1.00 in a plastic baggie taped to it, with a note that said "Enjoy a movie.  Pay it forward!"  I loved it.  I stood back and saw several people check out the note and keep on moving.  I'm sure they were like me and figured -- "give it to someone who needs the dollar".

That's just a small example of kindness. It really seems that kindness and generosity have gone to a whole new level in our world. I love seeing the generosity of people who do random acts of kindness like those who pay for the meal of the car behind them in the drive through line, or who stop to help someone with a flat tire, or who leave a little "extra" tip for their waitress.

I'm still teaching a Bible Study on the Fruit of the Spirit and this last week's lesson was about the quality of Kindness -- so of course seeing this Redbox "kindness" reemphasized how it works.  When we genuinely care about people, we find ourselves paying attention to what might bless them.  We might even think about their circumstances and become concerned about their welfare.  We're willing to get involved in their lives.  As our love grows, the details of their lives become more and more important to us.  It begins to really matter to us if they are sad or discouraged, struggling or in pain, needy or lonely.  Caring about others sure does eliminate unfriendliness, a lack of compassion, and a judgmental spirit.  So we need to ask God to help us have greater love and compassion for others.

A sure sign that our concern for people is growing is when we find ourselves looking at people and thinking, “What would help her?  What would help him?  What does he need?  What does she need?”  We might even ask God, “How can I serve this person? How can I make his or her life easier?

Let's TRY A LITTLE KINDNESS today......perhaps our kindness might just be what someone needs to change their dark world to light and bright!

Ephesians 4:31-32 “ Stop being mean, bad-tempered, and angry. Quarreling, harsh words, and dislike of others should have no place in your lives. Instead, be KIND to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another..."

Forgiveness Brings FREEDOM

Day 238 of Photo Inspirations – Forgiveness Brings FREEDOM
I’ve admitted it before....reality shows are my thing.  I record them to later watch them when I'm running on my treadmill.  I love watching real people, living real life with its ups and downs, seeing them overcome incredible obstacles and become winners.....or losers -- in the case of "The Biggest Loser" show.

One of the shows I like is “Extreme Weight Loss” and last week’s show was so heart wrenching, yet inspiring when the woman’s life made a huge turn-around.  It was about Jackie whose happy and healthy life was shattered when word came to her that the caregiver at the day care had shaken her toddler son causing long-term brain damage.  Between feeling guilty that it was her fault for her boy to have been put in harm’s way and the emotional trial that put the caregiver behind bars, Jackie gained over 100 pounds. And Jackie had such bitterness and unforgiveness for the woman and for her own family’s lack of support during a time when she needed them the most.

Being chosen to be a part of Extreme Weight Loss, helped her to forgive the caregiver in order to shed her physical and emotional weight, as well as to forgive herself.  It was beautiful to see the transformation that forgiveness gave her, along with the physical transformation.   Forgiveness opened the door for a reuniting of her family, the ability to go to the woman who hurt her son and forgive her – which caused that woman to experience freedom of her mistakes, and thereby forgive herself.

How often do we hold things against others, because we were truly a victim.  That hurts, and it’s NOT fair!  However, the truth is -- even if we weren't at fault, our failure to forgive, imprisons us.  Forgiveness doesn’t mean that we are approving of someone’s actions, or denying a wrongdoing.  It doesn’t mean that we have to trust, or reconcile with that person.  It DOES mean, that we are not going to hold bitterness in our heart, and allow that person or situation, to keep us locked up.

Each of us have been the one hurt.  We’ve also been the one that hurt someone.   With that failure, sometimes the guilt of our wrongdoing can put us in chains.  When we forgive someone of their wrong, that frees them up to start over, and, hopefully learn from the mistake, and not go down that road again.  Forgiveness is such a beautiful, freeing step to wholeness in our lives.

Ephesians 4:32 says "And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you."

I’m thankful that God didn’t hold my failures against me.
Forgiveness brings freedom.  It looks and feels so good to be free!