Being One-Another Minded

I wasn't in the "in-crowd" growing up. You know -- the crowd where everyone knew each other -- gathered together in their little groups, ate together, in clubs together, hung out together at recess. I was a shy child. I know that's hard to believe. Instead of going to the outgoing kids, my mom coaxed me to look for the other kids who are by themselves. She told me to show interest in them and ask questions about what they like. “If you care for others, you won’t be lonely yourself.” That nudging from my mom still serves me well today. At first it was hard to overcome my nervousness to talk to others I didn’t know. But over time, I learned to say hi to any girls who were sitting alone. I became more comfortable and now – here I am, many decades later, and I still follow my mom’s advice when I’m in a room filled with people I don’t know. Look for the lonely. I assure you. They are just hoping someone will speak to them.

It’s easy to walk into a crowded room and either stick with the people we know or hide in a corner with a phone. Yet this verse tells us otherwise: “Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.” (Romans 12:10) We’re instructed to consider others. Introverts have difficulty making that first move toward a stranger. Believe me. I know. But as God’s children, we step out of our comfort zones and reach out as a service to the Lord -- looking for the lonely, looking for ways to bless others. "One another” is mentioned twice in that scripture. It shows us how important loving others is to God. Opening up the medicine cabinet right with the CURE for loneliness and shyness. Being “one another” minded. When we purposelly look to serve others, our shyness will melt away and we will make heart-to-heart connections.

I really wasn't outgoing, but I learned "to have friends, show yourself friendly". Now I have so many brothers and sisters in Christ. Please dear friends know that you are not alone! You are part of God’s beautiful, loving family. What if we began to pray and humble ourselves to become God's servants who live a life of ONE ANOTHER LIVING? "What can I do for you? What can I do for others that helps them to win?" We're ALL on the same team -- we're God's kids, and we represent our Father. Everyone will know us by being on the LIGHT side by our love for one another. All for ONE -- ONE for all.

Love is Being an Encourager

"Good Afternoon! Welcome to Moe's!" Like me, I’m sure you’ve taken notice of the fast food chains and stores whose employees shout out welcoming words when we walk in their doors! It may be scripted, but to me, it's encouraging! I was noticed! I also recognize it when a salesperson has been taught to be friendly and to look for something they can compliment their customers about: "I love your hair!" "Nice sweater!" In spite of their words sounding a little trite, it still gives us a feel-good feeling, doesn’t it?

I’ve had many encouragers in my life. At age 12, I remember my first babysitting job (50 cents an hour) taking care of a doctor’s two little ones – ages 3 months and 3. Their home was right across the street from ours, so the children's mom was assured I had help on stand-by if I needed it. I’ll never forget overhearing that mom telling my Mom: “Donna is so responsible for her age!” That made me want to be even more responsible. I’ll never forget, as a 13-year old, the choir director pointing out “You harmonize so beautifully." That gave me the confidence to belt out my harmonies even more. A friend said, " Donna, you have the most beautiful clothes.” That’s because my sweet mama, on a limited income, made sure that I wore trendy, beautiful clothes and she could do that because she was a great “deal” finder. I think that’s why, to this day, I head to the sales racks before I look at the full-priced items.

Today, I am an outgoing, avid writer, blogger, teacher and speaker because my husband encouraged me to speak publicly. He encouraged me to get my pilot’s license, real estate broker’s license and more. I had a boss who encouraged me to apply for a job that I didn’t have the required Master’s Degree for, but he knew I could do the job. I did and he was right. My Sweetheart passed way and I was surrounded by encouragers who literally lifted me up above the fray with their love and support.

And, now, the encouragement I receive from so many of you, my FB and blog friends and family that cheer me on in doing what I’m doing right now -- encouraging me to keep encouraging.
I was encouraged by others and I, too, became an encourager. That’s my point today, to say it’s time for us all to put on our Encourager Hats. It’s obvious how much our world needs cheerleaders and encouragers. I know, as I type this post, you get what I’m saying because you sense God’s gift within you. You’ve been through your share of heartaches and someone was there to encourage you, so you know like 2 Corinthians 1:4 says “So that you might comfort others with the same comfort that you’ve been comforted with”, you must encourage others. Now you are passionately aware that you’ve been called to speak up, reach out and lift up others. It’s not always easy because you don’t want to intrude or be a “know it all”, but that’s not what matters. What matters is you have something to give..

God uses people to encourage people. He's looking for available hearts to love and encourage the world around them. My hand is raised. How about yours?

1 Thessalonians 5:11 "Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing"! Rise and shine, Encouragers! Let’s go encourage!

Being an Influencer

Okay....this is longer than my usual "long", but it describes major influencers in my life. When I come to Tulsa, I squeeze in as much as possible because there are so many precious friends and family here. Yesterday was no exception. First was attending mass at my home parish and sitting beside my Tulsa “family” who mean the world to me. My godson brought us all together when he was a very sick newborn. My husband and I fell in love with this family long before his birth, but it was his little precious and vulnerable life that cemented us all together. Isn’t it amazing how what seems to be the worst of times, brings out the best in people and the best of times? Owen is 13 now so it’s been 13 years of watching God perform miracle after miracle in his life. Since my husband passed away, Owen has taken his place beside me in church and he still holds my hand and wraps his arms around me with abandon. Be still my heart! I was thrilled to have lunch with them and seeing the two youngest in their costumes for Trunk or Treat that followed. This family has been amazing influencers in my life.

After church and before lunch, I made a couple of quick visits to see two amazing “older” women. My first visit was to see Margaret, the mother of my brother-in-law, She lives in a skilled nursing facility, If you need a pick-me-up, go see her. I walked in her room and she was beaming from ear-to-ear and excited to tell me “I’m 96 years old now! Just look at these paintings on my walls. I painted them all!” Margaret is a dear, optimistic, light-hearted friend that as long as I’ve known her, her outgoing, and warm personality made me feel loved. She influenced me.

Then I headed over to spend time with my mother-in-law. I took her dinner the night before and we caught up then, but yesterday I savored our time together once again. She's gone through a lot physically, but now that she lives with Karen, my husband’s sister, she's become stronger and filled with so much vitality. She boasted “I’ve gained five pounds!” And that says a lot! I can’t begin to tell you how much she has influenced my life -- the most of which are her prayers for us. I asked her “What are you going to do today?” She quickly responded, “I’ve got lots of calls to make!” She has a list of people she calls to encourage. She is sure not done yet. She’ll be 96 on Wednesday.

Lastly, I made my way to another dear friend and mentor. Oh, how I love this precious saint, Sister Marie Pierre. After 50+ years of ministry, she retired and lives in a small space at St. Joseph's Monastery but it is everything she hoped for in this season of her life. A few months ago she had a pretty bad fall and had to have hip surgery. I was shocked to see that she was waiting at the door with her walker for me when I arrived. She wasn’t setting any records, but she was up and moving. Another nun waited with her and she asked: “Are you a teacher?” I replied, “Yes, I am, but I’m also one of Sister Pierre’s children.” We made each other cry as we shared sweet memories, and about our future....getting to graduate to heaven. We talked about how our loved ones and the saints and Jesus are cheering us on to the finish line. I could tell she is longing for the day when she'll go home, but in the meantime, sitting at her feet, feeling God's presence and His peace all around her, is the place to be. God continues to use her to touch our lives. She has MANY children -- of course, not biologically, but she sure had a hand in raising many of us in the ways we should go.

Why do I go into so much detail about my life and share it on social media? One, it will be forever an archive to remind me of those people who passed my way. I’m quite sure they were all a part of God’s Master Plan for my life. Placing value on those people and acknowledging them as precious and valuable makes them matter in the grand scheme of God’s almighty handiwork. I love to give credit where credit is due. Each teacher, mentor, encourager, family member, friend, and even casual acquaintance are strategic in God’s wisdom to co-partner with Him. I am so grateful for those who helped “make” me.

The point is to embrace God’s plan AND people that come into our lives – there’s a reason for them all. I’m so thankful that mine has made me purposeful in my mission and determination to finish strong. Perhaps you’re thinking of your own life and those who have contributed to who you are today. Maybe phone them or pay them a visit to let them know how thankful you are for them. Why do I go into so much detail about my life and share it on social media? One, it will be archived to remind me of those people who partnered with God to fulfill His Master Plan in my life. Acknowledging them is giving credit where credit is due. Each teacher, mentor, encourager, family member, friend, and even casual acquaintance are strategically placed in our lives by God. I am so grateful for those who helped “make” me.

The point is to embrace God’s plan AND people that come into our lives. There is a reason for them all. I’m so thankful that mine has made me purposeful in my mission and determination to finish strong. Perhaps you’re thinking of your own life and those who have contributed to who you are today. Maybe phone them or pay them a visit to let them know how thankful you are for them.

Changing is Possible

I know it’s hard to believe, but in all honesty, I was a shy,timid introvert as I grew up. I avoided crowds, parties, and situations that would cause me to HAVE to interact with people. So, obviously, I was not chosen to be “Most Popular”. And, I know it’s even harder to believe that I am still, not by nature, outgoing. I literally have to force myself to walk up to people and create conversation. BUT, I realized, long ago, that if I remained in that mind-set, I would never have friends. “If you want friends, you must show yourself friendly.” I had to be willing to get out of my comfort zone and be willing to change. I had to become "tweak-able"!

One of my favorite authors, Max Lucado, puts it this way: “Here’s some good news. You aren’t stuck with today’s personality. You aren’t condemned to “grumpydom.” You are tweak-able! So what if you were born a bigot? You don’t have to die one. Where did we get the idea we can’t change? Where do statements come from such as, “It’s just my nature to worry,” or. . . “I’ll always be pessimistic. I’m just that way.” Or, “I have a bad temper. I can’t help the way I react.” Who says? Would we say, “It’s just my nature to have a broken leg. I can’t do anything about it.” Of course not. If our body malfunctions, we seek help. Shouldn’t we do the same with our hearts? Can’t we seek aid for our sour attitudes? Of course we can. Jesus can change our hearts! He wants us to have a heart like His!”

And, I add to Max’s words, if we desire to be that outgoing, optimistic, cheerful personality that others want to hang with, then, we must purpose to live outside our comfort zones. We need to be the gal or guy that we want to hang with. When we're that gal or guy – others will gravitate to our "sunny" and even "funny" dispositions. They'll want to hang with us because we exude He Who lives BIG in us AND His personality ROCKS with joy, peace, abundance, patience, beauty and a merry heart!