This is what Love and Life Looks Like

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart." (Jeremiah 1:5) Oh, yes, my friends – God isn’t surprised by surprises. In fact, He is delicately, intricately, lovingly, and carefully at work in our mama’s womb from the moment of our conception. And these photos are proof of what love, support and life look like when a young person and her family value that precious, God-given life. Is it easy? I'm sure it isn't -- but it will be oh, so worth every minute of choosing life.

Last week, a dear friend sent me a private FB message asking if I could help her with a proclamation she was making to the world. I was surprised by the story, but I was so proud of her for being such a loving, caring and supportive mom to her 16-year-old daughter, but also because she led us all in the value and sanctity of life.

I was able to pray with her a few weeks ago when she came for prayer for several things -- but this one wasn't mentioned. Her hands were already full including the passing on of her beloved father. I love how deeply my friend loves. I asked if I could share my suggestions for her proclamation. Obviously she said "yes".

"Amidst all the concerns and worries about all that’s going in our world, the Torres Family were blessed to welcome a beautiful, brand new life into our home on Sunday, September 6th, 2020 at 8:05 pm. Needless to say, a lot changed for the Torres household when precious baby boy, Elijah, made his debut, making Secily, a mom, Andrew and Seth, uncles, and for Richard and I, grandparents. So, this is our new US – with new life, joy and laughter brimming in our home!

This is Us, today, but just a few months ago, when we heard the shocking news of our teenage daughter embarking on an unplanned journey, our first reaction was tears, fears and concerns. But, after the initial shock, we chose to welcome this precious addition to our home and family. We are so grateful for the unconditional support and prayers from our family and our church family who embraced the journey wholeheartedly with us.

We are so proud of our daughter for choosing life at the young age of 16, and only three weeks after my dad’s passing. So, please join our entire Torres family as we welcome Elijah Candelario, weighing in at 5 pounds, 4 ounces and 18 inches long. Sweet and beautiful Elijah, you have given us reasons for so much joy in a time of grieving from the loss of your great grandpa, Candelario. We love you so much and are so thankful God gave us you!
“You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing. You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy.” Psalm 30:11"

I know this story isn't the same for everyone when making the tough choices for life. Some young women don't have supportive families like the Torres family. Some don't have resources to provide for their prenatal care, the birth of the baby and the ongoing care that follows, but God who delicately and intricately formed that precious baby, is the same God who cares for us all of our lives. He has plans for each life and in partnering with Him, we'll find the support, the resources, the strength and, if for the best, a loving couple, unable to give birth naturally, is waiting and longing to adopt. Living with no regrets is key to loving life. Life is precious. And so are you.

You are Welcome at my House!

I’m going to be a bit feisty in today’s blog. I can, because this Facebook/Blog space is my house, so to speak. I welcome you to stop by and check out what’s going on and to see what God’s download is for us. I have some "house" rules that include kindness, encouraging each other and everyone is especially welcome if you need a friend, a confidant, or a shoulder to cry on and to have someone who will pray with and for you. I’m expressing my heart and the absolute non-negotiables in my life. I’m sharing the values that we built our faith and family upon for generations.

This blog was inspired by my 16-year-old grandson, Brennan, who I’ve hung out with over the last several days and when he came to Frisco a few weeks ago. Something, rather, Someone, of monumental importance has happened to him. This guy has had a major encounter with God – not that he hadn’t before, but this time, he is all in and is undaunted in making his love for God known. He is daily on Tik-Tok and Instagram speaking to young people about making the most important decision in their lives, which is to have a relationship with Jesus Christ. He is unashamed --- Mr. Cooler than Cool guy has had a radical transformation. And the best part, is that others have noticed this 180 – as he lives by example now. He wants to be a difference-maker. I was so blessed on Sunday when I saw him up at the front of the church on Sunday with other young people -- singing and raising their hands in praise and worship to God.

This year, he has taken this new zeal for Christ seriously and is taking it to school with him in an audacious way. His friends have noticed. Not everyone is excited about it as he was the cut-up, attention-getting, not-taking-God-real-serious guy. I saw him in his room playing a video game, while listening to a minister speaking on his computer. We binged on the three “God’s Not Dead” movies and ended with “The Case for Christ” movie. Brennan and these movies fired me up too -- with the certainty of the reality of Christ’s birth, death and resurrection. Among the many reasons for knowing it is true, over 500 eyewitnesses saw Him alive. (1 Corinthians 15:6)

Brennan inspired me so much that I want to make my values and beliefs known too. My values are found in the Bible, God's Holy Word. I agree with the psalmist’s words “Your Word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.” (Psalm 119:105) And in Joshua 1:8-9: “This book of the law shall not depart out of my mouth, but I shall meditate on it day and night, that I may observe to do according to all that is written in it; for then I will make my way prosperous, and then I will have good success." Scriptures undergird my values which are the absolute non-negotiables in my life. These are some of my statements of faith and my "house" rules:

** Love, peace, joy and God’s grace are fluently spoken here
** I believe in God our Father. I believe in Jesus Christ, His only Son. I believe in the Holy Spirit – our God, all three in one. I believe in the resurrection. I believe that in the name of Jesus, we can be healed and set free from any bondage. I believe in a real enemy of our souls, but more importantly, I believe we can live in complete freedom because “Greater is He who lives in us, than he that is in the world.” (1 John 4:4)
**I believe that if we applied Jesus' "house rules" to our life -- we would make our world a better place. His "house rules" (aka commandments) are to “Love God with all our heart, mind and soul” and to “Love our neighbor as ourselves.” (Matthew 22:37-38) Keeping those "rules", reveals the depth of love we have for God and each other.
** I am Pro-Life. I believe ALL LIVES MATTER from the moment of conception to the grave.
** I believe in our “one nation under God” in our Pledge of Allegiance; in supporting our military; in supporting and praying for Israel; in the ability to worship God and practice our faith without being hindered by government; in patriotism where I stand for my National Anthem and my American flag.

When God made us, He planted within us certain things that we value deeply. They’re hardwired in our heart. Through our life experiences – from the environment we are raised in, the schools we go to, the friends we associate with, and the religious foundation we receive, God makes them clear to us. Those things are our core values. Now, you know mine.

I’m a Miracle – so Happy Birthday to Me!

Today my soliloquy goes like this: "It's my birthday! It's my birthday and it's a MIRACLE! In spite of all the odds, I am still here!" On this my B-day, I’m dog-sitting my children’s 85-pound, Australian Shepherd, Buddy, and their 5-pound Yorkie, Emma, while the fam is hanging out and enjoying the cool temps and fishing opportunities in Tennessee’s Smoky Mountains this week. I’m on doggie and plant-duty and having a little vacay of my own at their home here in Frisco Square.

I’m hanging out where there are so many sights-to-see on a morning, noon, afternoon and evening walk with these two canines! Yesterday, in the cool of the early morning, we made our way to Frisco Square's historical area. Arriving there, I noticed this little house on a post, full of books with a sign that read: Little Free Library “Take a Book – Share a Book”. I did, and I'm sharing with you! "Miracles" is the book I chose. I didn't take time to see if it merited a read, but the title, alone, reminded me that I am a “Miracle” – my mama was never to have been able to give birth again after my sister was born, 12 years earlier. First miracle -- I was conceived. Second miracle -- I was born with a heart murmur. But – here I am -- alive and well!

Today, I hold my head up high and announce – I've turned 72. Does that alarm me? Am I sad? Do I feel old? Do I have regrets? Nope, nope, nope and nope! I'm a strong, vibrant, happy, very alive woman, lover of God and people, and ready to embrace another year. Bring it on! Thank you, Pastor Craig Groeschel for giving me this quote: “I’m still here – so I’m not done!” I'm living my passion daily – my mission, my family, my friends, my blog, and hopefully, letting my little light shine! I know what to value in this life and I know what matters. What matters are the blessings of family and friends and the “blessing of the LORD that makes one rich, and He adds no sorrow to it.” (Proverbs 10:22) And, indeed I am very rich in joy, peace, love, hope, and with the prospect of living forever and ever with my Lord. Oh how blessed I am.

Thanks to my sweet kids for the "birthday eve" gifts of love! By the way, that “Miracles” book I found – I read the foreword later in the day. This is an excerpt – how befitting for this day! “If your Christian life is boring, this book offers a cure. Disciples live on the edge, asking, “How can I serve you today, Lord? Who can I touch for you?” And at the end of the day, they can pray, “Thanks for using me, Jesus.” They don’t think about the day’s sacrifices. They think about the sheer joy of being used by God to touch the lives of others – to meet their needs, love them and share the truth about Jesus through their actions and their words. When Jesus said, “It’s more blessed to give than to receive,: he wasn’t kidding!” I'd say that sums up who I desire to be daily! Thanks, God, for the MIRACLE of life and the reminder that living for YOU is the best gift EVER!

Remembering Yesterday and Yester-Years

It’s early Sunday Morning, Father’s Day, and I’m taking in the sound of the melodious rainfall. I look out my back window and my eyes go right to that yellow rose bush being watered from heaven. Don’t tell me otherwise! Sure, I know there’s scientific reasons for rains, but on this day, Father’s Day, I’m imagining my “love” reminding me he remembers – and so do I.

That little yellow rose bush has fully bloomed twice this season already, and here it goes again. Of course, it reminds me of the man of my dreams and my reality – my sweet husband and the father of my two children, the grandfather of my seven grandchildren. Oh, how blessed we were to have known and loved this man. Our wedding included yellow roses, every home we ever lived in (even the two homes since his passing on) has had a yellow rose bush planted there. When my babies were born, yellow roses were at my bedside. So, of course, the rain and the yellow roses compounded my awareness that he isn’t here, but, oh, yes, he is. He lives so big in our hearts.

Just a memory to spark so much gratitude for those little things in my life, that on a day like this, I can rejoice and be glad and not sad. Oh, how I would love for him to still be here with me enjoying our family together. He’s not – but I am. I’m not done imparting the best of me, the best of us, to these I love.

My crew in Austin sent me photos of their fun times and this crew in Frisco, celebrated with huevos rancheros for breakfast, online church, Hutchins Barbeque for lunch, piano serenades from Payton, and great fun playing the fishing game that Papa gave Payton 13 years ago. What a day! Yes, we would have rather been real fishing, but since we couldn’t, the game brought back some of the best memories.

I’ve loved the photos many of you, my social media friends, posted of their dads and husbands – those who passed on, those still alive and well, and even those who have a baby “still cookin' in the oven”. I know your journey and my journey may be completely different, but if we'll all practice gratitude and watch for all the sweet kisses from heaven like I did when I heard the rain and saw those yellow roses, you, too, will see the beauty all around you. You'll laugh with children, you'll start being a light to others, and you might even dance in the rain. It's been raining a lot lately, so why not put on those dancing shoes -- and DANCE?
“You have turned my mourning into dancing; you took off my sackcloth and clothed me with a garment of joy.” Psalm 30:11

Only if Life was like a Hallmark Movie

I am STILL a Hallmark movie fan. Weekends, especially, you’ll often find me indulging in yet another Hallmark movie. Why, you may ask? So many reasons! They’re peaceful and calming. People are pleasant and kind. Their lives are focused on family, friends and doing good things. They’re wholesome and non-violent. The storylines revolve around love and happiness. But mostly -- because they always have happy endings. Who doesn’t like happy endings, especially when it comes to love?

We all do. But, the reality is happy endings aren't always guaranteed. Because of real life. Real relationships. Real people. Real problems. Relationships fail, friendships struggle or end, divorces happen, loved ones pass away, and true love often seems hard to find. When real life happens, we often feel disappointed and alone, especially during this month that is hyper-focused on love and romance.

Speaking from a gal who has been without the “romance” side for several years now, I know that earthly relationships should never be what determines our happiness. If our happiness hinge on earthly love or perfect relationships, we’ll always feel disappointed and, quite possibly, unhappy and lacking joy.

But, really I do know romance without a romantic lover. I experience that romance daily -- along with peace, joy, and even happiness through my relationship with Jesus Christ. He is the one constant that always assures my REAL life will have a forever after, happy ending. He shares about His unconditional and endless love for His children in John 15:9: “I have loved you just as My Father has loved Me. Stay in My love.” Jesus calls us to realize how much we are loved, just as the Father loves His Son. Oh, let’s breathe that in and embrace the intensity AND the immensity of that love.

In John 15:11, Jesus explains why it’s so important to recognize, and abide in His love: “I have told you these things so My joy may be in you and your joy may be full.” You see, it’s His love alone that can bring true joy to our hearts. God’s joy is the real love we all long for, but sometimes we look for and expect to find it in all the wrong places.

It would be oh, so nice if life were like a Hallmark movie and every relationship ended happily ever after. But I’ve learned it’s possible, each day, to be joy-filled and to feel happy no matter what’s happening in my life -- regardless of my relationships status. I know the true joy from God that is the “hallmark” of being a fully devoted follower of Christ. You can know this joy, too, if you’ll give your heart and life to THE ONE Who hears the desires of our hearts and Who fillls us with joy and happiness every day. His love is enough!

You Matter AND Your Vote Matters

When someone came into my space on Facebook and challenged my morals, my faith, and my confidence in my president, I think a new fervor for speaking up for what I believe-is-right went to a whole new level. That’s why, today, I am urging all my friends to register by the February 3rd deadline in Texas to be able to cast a ballot in March primaries and in the November election for president. (Check your state's registration deadlines!) If we want our voices heard, taking the steps to register to vote is critical.

I had already written this blog when I received an anonymous text message today asking me to complete a voter registration they supplied, to be sure I'm registered to vote. I typed in STOP because I am registered already. Then I received an email as seen below. Clearly it says it is not affiliated with any party but I checked out their sponsors and Planned Parenthood is one of them. So, clearly, this is not a bipartisan effort. BEWARE! I'm not prone to worry or concern because I know God is in control, but I am prone to knowing the tactics of the enemy of our souls.

I saw Dr. James Dobson's newsletter. He said: "Socialism could replace freedom and free enterprise. God help us if you and I fail to fulfill our moral responsibility.” He made it clear there will be dire consequences if Christians sit out our elections -- stressing that it carries much more weight than any other election in United States history. “Everything is on the line, and a wholly new interpretation of the Constitution looms before us."

Having advised five presidents and received his Ph.D. in Child Development from the University of Southern California (USC) – where he served as an associate clinical professor of pediatrics for 14 years – Dobson’s counsel has been held in high esteem throughout America for many decades, and his latest piece of advice focuses on one topic that he said “rises to the top” over all others. “Powerful social movements and passions are ‘blowing in the wind,’ and most of them have dangerous implications for the institution of the family, religious liberty, our children and unborn babies – and the country at large.

"Christians must go to the polls and let their voices be heard” said the host of the Dr. James Dobson’s Family Talk radio program – speaking with the authority of his 17 honorary degrees, 17 years’ experience on the Children’s Hospital of Los Angeles’ attending staff, and as a member of the National Radio Hall of Fame – asked his supporters if they will take action-steps in order to continue living out their faith in America. “What will you do about it?” Will you sit out the elections? God help us if you and I fail to fulfill our moral responsibility. Everything is on the line.” We – the voters – have it within our power to protect our Constitution, preserve our democratic system of government, and secure the blessings of liberty for us and our posterity.” He implores Christians to do their duty by taking time to register and vote in the upcoming elections.

Now, back to Donna’s thoughts. I sincerely sense an urgency to rally the sleeping Christian giants who slept through the election of 2016. This year’s presidential election is even more serious. I vote because my morals and values are so closely tied to my Christian faith and what God’s Word says. How can we not vote when there are such critical issues of life and death and of God’s Word taken seriously or not? Voting confirms my commitment to stand-up for those morals and values and in so doing I get to choose who aligns or comes the closest with those beliefs. It is a privilege to live in a democracy-led country which enables us to vote in or vote out candidates that align or don’t align with our principles. If I don’t vote I shouldn't complain or whine about anything that's going on in our country. That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

My Safety Deposit Box is Secure

For years, my husband and I had many important documents in a safety deposit box at our bank. Ours held only documents, but my dear friend had some very precious, rare, expensive jewelry in hers. I wondered "Why have those items if they can't be worn or used?" But to both of us, we didn't want to risk our items being stolen, broken, or burned up, so we took them to the bank and entrusted it all to the protection of a safety deposit box.

The key word is ENTRUSTED. We entrust our home's protection to a security system. We entrust the care of our children to a day care or school system. Even more than a bank lock box, our home's security system or our children in someone else’s care, whatever we entrust to God, we can be assured that He is going to take care of it. We can count on it. He has a perfect track record. Other people and systems may not have a consistent track record of taking care of things for us. But whatever we entrust to God, we can be assured “It’s done and done!” A long time ago when we were young, inexperienced and green in just about every area of life, we entrusted all we had to God – and that included what concerned us – from the huge pressures to the daily details of making ends meet.

Maybe today there are worries, concerns, family, children, husband, wife, and every situation that is on our minds today that need to be entrusted to God. All of it – from the least to the greatest – needs to be entrusted to the safety deposit box of God’s love.

Worry is, in a way, like atheism. We act like spiritual orphans who don’t have a Father in Heaven Who loves us and Who can be trusted. Worry is unbelief. It’s saying we don’t believe the thousands of promises God made in His Word. The most difficult time for us to put our "stuff" in God’s safety deposit box is when we’re in pain. When we are suffering, we don’t want to trust even God. We want to pull it back and hold it to ourselves. St. Paul knew this, but he also knew that when we’re in pain, that’s when we need to trust God the most: “I am suffering here in prison. But I am not ashamed of it, for I know the one in whom I trust, and I am sure that He is able to guard what I have ENTRUSTED to Him until the day of His return.” (2 Timothy 1:12)

Maybe, like me, you need to take all those concerns and worries today – let them go, give them – ENTRUST them to God’s safety deposit box. That's when we have been convinced God is alive and well and He can be TRUSTED to work ALL THINGS for our good in due season.

Our Rich Family Heritage

My friend posted this beautiful photo on her timeline a few days ago. She was in Pocahontas, Illinois. I commented: “I have family roots that go back to John Rolfe and Pocahontas. They were our 10th generation grandparents. Yay! I'm multi-racial! There's a tiny percentage of Native American in me! And I thought I had no famous folks in my family lineage."

That lineage is on my Mom's side of the family. When she was up in years, I realized I knew little of her family history -- stories about her 10 siblings, what it was like living in a large family, how their parents made ends meet, how she met my Dad, their first kiss, their wedding, and what it was like to have us kids. What a shame I waited so long to find out. I realized that I was so "me" focused that I didn't treasure and appreciate where I came from. So, I did something about it. I took my camcorder, set it on a tripod and spent many hours and days (but a few minutes at a time) interviewing her. Her stories were so precious. Fortunately, I stopped to spend quality time with her that resulted in VHS tapes that I gave out to my siblings and their kids when Mom passed away at age 94 in 2004. I was able to pass on our rich (not in money, but in faith and fortitude) family history.

As I type this today, my Holy Lands “bucket list” pilgrimage three years ago comes to my mind. The more we delved into the rich history of Christianity in the tours that explained so many of our “Family of God’s” history, the more I realized how much I need to be living everyday with great appreciation and gratitude for what our fore-fathers and mothers gave us. How can I do that unless I make the effort to know that heritage? Thankfully, I have a dear cousin, just a few years older than me, that kept up so much better than I did with our family. She accentuates all the positives – the blessings – of our rich family history of faith.

Imagine the wisdom that’s stored up in our elderly family members that could give us so much insight to how rich we are today because of the price they paid to get us here. My children are getting the best of me as I archive so many of my personal life experiences as well as all that rich family heritage that I recall to them. Now, take that even further in realizing the rich family history that goes back to our first “mother and father” (Adam and Eve), studying the scriptures to see where they went right…and where they went wrong – lessons they learned that we sure don’t want to repeat. So much wisdom to learn all throughout the Bible that can keep us pointed in the direction of peace, comfort and joy in our lifelong faith journeys.

I assure you that my Christian walk has been so faith-filled because of what I’ve learned in scripture from our “family heritage”. There have been times in my life where I’ve experienced the pain of my poor choices or actions. In those moments, it can be easy to entertain a notion that I have blown it, that God can’t use me and there’s no hope for restoration. I think we all face those feelings when we fail. During these times, I draw strength from God’s Word, where He tells the stories of heroes of the faith who blew it, like King David, Moses, Peter, Saul (Paul), Abraham and even more. In some cases, their failures were so extreme, it would be natural to say that God would have a right to turn His back on them. But that isn’t God’s nature. He is all about redemption. So when we fail, we can be thankful that God loves a good comeback story.

Paul reminds us that “in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to His purpose.” (Rom. 8:28) This should give us hope that no matter what we may have done, our adventure isn’t over. God’s at work reclaiming our story. Failure doesn’t disqualify us, even if we’ve been following Jesus for some time. Our story is still being written. The only way that failure can get the last word in our life is if we choose to let it. We serve a God who is able to take our defeats and missteps and still use us to bring glory to his name. Whether we’re walking with Him faithfully or we’ve had a few stumbles along the way, God continues to encourage us to get up, brush ourselves off and build His kingdom.

I started this post with talking about my own family history and how it has affected my life for so much good. But our rich family history of faith is the yesterday, today and forevermore news and if we continue to review it, rehearse it, and make it known to our children and our children's children, we will carry on our rich family history until we all join together in one big, rich family reunion in heaven. What a day of rejoicing that will be!

Our Rich Family History

Last Sunday as we sat around the table, we talked about our “first memories” as a child. Larry said: "I was very young and my mom and I lived in a small one-bedroom apartment. The little fold-up bed I slept on had a plastic cover on the mattress and the sound of the plastic when I moved around woke up my mom and me." He’s come a long way. And, thank God, his beginnings with a single mom caused him to be compassionate toward women who are raising their families alone. That’s one of the reasons he champions the EMwomen organization and the women that my daughter is so passionate about rescuing.

Recently, my cousin and I had a long telephone conversation about many precious family moments when we were young. Our grandparents and their fervent prayer life. Our mothers, who were sisters, and their faith that modeled to us the way we should go. One of my earliest memories was visiting her and my sister in their college dorm in Springfield, MO and eating pizza for the first time in my life. I was six years old. Funny – those earliest memories!

Last week, at the memorial service of a loved one, the pianist/vocalist invited us to sing along with him at the beginning of the service. The first song we sang was “The Old Rugged Cross” and at the first note, my tears began to flow. It was an old song I had not heard for many years and it reminded me of my “rich family history” of being in church, worshipping God and hearing all those stories and songs of God’s amazing grace.

When my mother was up in years, I realized I didn't know much about her history -- stories about her 12 siblings, what it was like living in a large family, how their parents were able to support them financially, how she met my dad, etc. What a shame that I waited so long to find out. I had been so "me" focused that I didn't treasure and appreciate where I came from. I did something about it. I set up my camcorder on a tripod and a few minutes and days at a time interviewed her. Her stories were so precious and so enlightening as to how far she had come and how strong she was throughout her years.

Fortunately, I finally stopped long enough to spend quality time with her that resulted in having VHS tapes made that I could give out to my siblings and their kids when mom passed away at age 94 in 2004. (I’m amusing myself as I type this when camcorders and VHS tapes are now just “blasts from the past”! I was able to pass on to my kids and siblings their rich (not in money, but in faith and fortitude) family history.

I own up to being nostalgic. I guess that comes with being on the other side of raising children, working and caring for a home and family with more time on my hands now to be thankful for my rich family history. I am one of those “older” family members who has a wealth of knowledge and stories just waiting to be shared. Thank you, Facebook, and social media for the ability to do just that. We spend so much time scrolling incessantly on our cell phones instead of one-on-one conversations with those who are filled with treasures that we are missing out on. We don’t talk and ask questions about their life and their past and what makes them who they are today. Maybe this little blog today gives you some inspiration to inquire about your family history – what it looked like “back in their day”, who were their heroes, what helped them conquer – especially in the days without so many conveniences and so much technology that we have today. You just may come to appreciate your rich family history, too!

I am so thankful that the richest family history we have was documented in God’s Holy Word – the Bible. The more I delve into the rich family history of Christianity, the more I know I need to be living every day with great appreciation and gratitude for what our forefathers and foremothers gave us. How can I do that unless I make the effort to know that heritage? Daily, I read or listen to a "Read-the-Bible-Through" in a one-year Bible app with scriptures and commentary. The scriptures come alive, especially as I hear some of the hair-brained mistakes made and the victories that were won by so many heroes of our faith. The history of our faith isn't OLD NEWS. It is the yesterday, today and forevermore news and if we continue to review it, rehearse it, and make it known to our children and our children's children, we will all be living in the plans and purposes of God's great love for His rich family.

Being an Influencer

Okay....this is longer than my usual "long", but it describes major influencers in my life. When I come to Tulsa, I squeeze in as much as possible because there are so many precious friends and family here. Yesterday was no exception. First was attending mass at my home parish and sitting beside my Tulsa “family” who mean the world to me. My godson brought us all together when he was a very sick newborn. My husband and I fell in love with this family long before his birth, but it was his little precious and vulnerable life that cemented us all together. Isn’t it amazing how what seems to be the worst of times, brings out the best in people and the best of times? Owen is 13 now so it’s been 13 years of watching God perform miracle after miracle in his life. Since my husband passed away, Owen has taken his place beside me in church and he still holds my hand and wraps his arms around me with abandon. Be still my heart! I was thrilled to have lunch with them and seeing the two youngest in their costumes for Trunk or Treat that followed. This family has been amazing influencers in my life.

After church and before lunch, I made a couple of quick visits to see two amazing “older” women. My first visit was to see Margaret, the mother of my brother-in-law, She lives in a skilled nursing facility, If you need a pick-me-up, go see her. I walked in her room and she was beaming from ear-to-ear and excited to tell me “I’m 96 years old now! Just look at these paintings on my walls. I painted them all!” Margaret is a dear, optimistic, light-hearted friend that as long as I’ve known her, her outgoing, and warm personality made me feel loved. She influenced me.

Then I headed over to spend time with my mother-in-law. I took her dinner the night before and we caught up then, but yesterday I savored our time together once again. She's gone through a lot physically, but now that she lives with Karen, my husband’s sister, she's become stronger and filled with so much vitality. She boasted “I’ve gained five pounds!” And that says a lot! I can’t begin to tell you how much she has influenced my life -- the most of which are her prayers for us. I asked her “What are you going to do today?” She quickly responded, “I’ve got lots of calls to make!” She has a list of people she calls to encourage. She is sure not done yet. She’ll be 96 on Wednesday.

Lastly, I made my way to another dear friend and mentor. Oh, how I love this precious saint, Sister Marie Pierre. After 50+ years of ministry, she retired and lives in a small space at St. Joseph's Monastery but it is everything she hoped for in this season of her life. A few months ago she had a pretty bad fall and had to have hip surgery. I was shocked to see that she was waiting at the door with her walker for me when I arrived. She wasn’t setting any records, but she was up and moving. Another nun waited with her and she asked: “Are you a teacher?” I replied, “Yes, I am, but I’m also one of Sister Pierre’s children.” We made each other cry as we shared sweet memories, and about our future....getting to graduate to heaven. We talked about how our loved ones and the saints and Jesus are cheering us on to the finish line. I could tell she is longing for the day when she'll go home, but in the meantime, sitting at her feet, feeling God's presence and His peace all around her, is the place to be. God continues to use her to touch our lives. She has MANY children -- of course, not biologically, but she sure had a hand in raising many of us in the ways we should go.

Why do I go into so much detail about my life and share it on social media? One, it will be forever an archive to remind me of those people who passed my way. I’m quite sure they were all a part of God’s Master Plan for my life. Placing value on those people and acknowledging them as precious and valuable makes them matter in the grand scheme of God’s almighty handiwork. I love to give credit where credit is due. Each teacher, mentor, encourager, family member, friend, and even casual acquaintance are strategic in God’s wisdom to co-partner with Him. I am so grateful for those who helped “make” me.

The point is to embrace God’s plan AND people that come into our lives – there’s a reason for them all. I’m so thankful that mine has made me purposeful in my mission and determination to finish strong. Perhaps you’re thinking of your own life and those who have contributed to who you are today. Maybe phone them or pay them a visit to let them know how thankful you are for them. Why do I go into so much detail about my life and share it on social media? One, it will be archived to remind me of those people who partnered with God to fulfill His Master Plan in my life. Acknowledging them is giving credit where credit is due. Each teacher, mentor, encourager, family member, friend, and even casual acquaintance are strategically placed in our lives by God. I am so grateful for those who helped “make” me.

The point is to embrace God’s plan AND people that come into our lives. There is a reason for them all. I’m so thankful that mine has made me purposeful in my mission and determination to finish strong. Perhaps you’re thinking of your own life and those who have contributed to who you are today. Maybe phone them or pay them a visit to let them know how thankful you are for them.

My 2018......and Beyond -- Resolutions

My Word of the Day is Resolution: a firm determination to do something, and not change it. Doesn’t that make sense? Maybe that’s why so many fail at "resolutions". We want a short term fix. A goal has an end date. A resolution is unending.

One of my "goals" with an end date of on or before December 31, 2018, was inspired by a book given to me by my grandson and his wife, “My Grandma: In Her Own Words”. It is a “fill-in-the-blanks" book that asks questions like “What was your home like growing up?” “What was it like to become a mother?” That book inspired me to write my autobiography this year – not for publishing, but to pass on to my family as legacy.

Typical new year's resolutions are actually goals. “Lose 20 pounds”. We get there and we check it off the list – “I made it!” We run that marathon. Check. We get our real estate license. Check. We attend that 6-week Bible Study. Check.

Resolutions are supposed to be a FIRM determination to do something – not with a set end-date, but a lifetime in mind. I've made resolutions that I expect will take me the distance beyond 2018 and for the rest of my life. Here’s a list I’ve started, but I expect to add to it as I press daily to be my best for God.

#1. I RESOLVE to worry less and pray more. I will give my concerns to God. I will pray I become so infused with God's Word that I have the fuel to be a woman of “true grit” – rather, true faith in God’s “keeping power” and trust in His timing, His love for me and His desire for my success.

#2. I RESOLVE to disconnect my mind from my mouth. At this mature age, I’ve amassed a great deal of wisdom. My brain is packed full of firsthand experience of doing the wrong thing at the wrong time and I want to save my children, grandchildren and others -- time and energy. But, I RESOLVE to hold my mouth from unsolicited advice, opinions and/or judgments.

#3. I RESOLVE to give 100% focus and attention to my family and friends when I’m in their presence. That means putting away my phone and computer and look in their eyes and listen, full on, like they are the single most valuable and treasured, important persons in my world….because THEY ARE!

#4. I RESOLVE to introduce others to my best friend. Of course my best friend is Jesus. A best friend is someone we talk about a lot. We imitate our best friend. We tell stories about our best friend. I want my best friend to be their best friend. I'll share Him with them every chance I get. I'll teach them a lot about "What would Jesus do? (WWJD).

#5. I RESOLVE to be a “HOPE” dealer by encouraging others with “Nothing is impossible with God!” I RESOLVE to spreading sunshine instead of dark clouds. Hope is great expectation that something GOOD is about to happen. “Let us hold fast to the HOPE we profess, for He who promised is faithful.” Hebrews 10:23

These are RESOLUTIONS that will not only set the course for my day, and year….but my entire life. What about you? Did you make New Year’s Resolutions, or LIFETIME Resolutions?

Merry Christmas Eve -- PLEASE Make Memories That Count -- You Just Never Know!

Merry Christmas Eve!! PLEASE Make Memories That Count -- You Just Never Know!
My sweet Mama would always make her calls to each of her grown children on Christmas Eve morning -- "Merry Christmas Eve!". We expected that call. And, with fervor and joy, I say that to all of my FB friends today -- MERRY CHRISTMAS EVE!

Eight years ago, our family was making their usual trek to Oklahoma for Christmas. Ryan, Shawntel and the boys flew into Fort Smith AR for time with her family first before coming to us in Tulsa. I'll never forget the hilarious story that ensued.

Typically, Ryan has a vehicle reserved that would accommodate the six members of his family, plus lots of luggage, but to his dismay, the reservation got lost in the shuffle, and the only vehicle they had was a 12 passenger van to rent. And that's how our Christmas of 2009 began with the most awesome of memories to be made. How amazing that God would give us this Christmas to remember in such a profound way.as it would be the last Christmas we had with my Sweetheart, their Dad and Papa.

Once all of the family made it to Tulsa, including Larry, Staci and their two, who came in from their home in Hot Springs, AR, we were ready for our traditional Christmas activities. And, the best part, Ryan's accidental misadventure with the car rental and having to get a 12-passenger van, made way for all of us to pile in and be all comfy cozy -- but not before the guys put up Christmas lights inside the van, with a wreath on the front bumper and the Wuerch/Wallace Family Country Singers & Dancers had a rowdy, hilarious time of singing Christmas carols, cheering and waving to passerbys -- making this night one to remember.

First order of business was to head to our family's favorite restaurant for making even more lasting memories -- Casa Bonita, followed by games and family fun. And, afterwards, we headed to Rhema Church/Bible College to drive through their spectacular lights extravaganza. It was so cold, but the family togetherness kept us warm. I've included photos -- note the one with my Sweetheart in the front passenger seat who seems very much in pain. He had reason to be.

The next day, we all went to Great Granny's to have some sweet time with her, then because it looked like it may snow, we took her home with us.

And that's when God put icing on the cake.....er..earth, for the Christmas to make memories like never before. We were literally snowed in which made for all 13 of us to have even more fun times of celebration: frolic and playing in the snow, having yummy meals together, the kids putting on their annual Christmas program/talent show for us, the reading of the Christmas Story with the kids by Papa, and Great Granny giving out her Christmas envelopes.

We made lots of precious memories in this time that we knew was orchestrated by God. During this entire weekend, Papa (my Sweetheart) valiantly fought through so much pain in his back.
He braved the pain by putting out every effort to build a snowman, to play and put his best foot forward.

2009 ended with our family tightly knitted together in love and support which prepared us for 2010 which would be, early on, the year of Papa's brave battle with Stage 4 Kidney Cancer and we would never have a Christmas on earth with him again. But, that's okay, because this Christmas was one that could ALWAYS be remembered as God saving the BEST for LAST!

I can't begin to encourage you enough to make the moments, minutes, hours count while you can. Tomorrow or next year could be one that changes everything. You'll be so ever grateful, like we were, that we celebrated each other in a way that God proved "Joy to the World" to us. For us, it was a Christmas to remember -- FOREVER! This is Christmas Eve. Keep Christ the center of the celebration. It's not Santa Claus is coming to town. It's Jesus is coming to town to bring His the perfect gift....HIMSELF!

The Symbols and Mementos of a Beautiful Life

My Sweetheart went "home" on November 16, 2010. On the day after, it was already time to begin the preparations for his home going celebration. We had to do all those necessary things one must do in dealing with a loved one’s passing: go to the funeral home, choose a casket and determine burial logistics, go to a florist and pick out flowers from the family, and visit with the pastor about the funeral specifics. And, we did all those necessary things to celebrate my Sweetheart’s life and home going. God guided every one of our steps.

Symbolism plays a vital role in our worship to God -- no matter our religious affiliation -- our hand gestures, religious icons, candles, pictures, music, scriptures, and so many other various forms of remembrance. And, likewise, I would find so much symbolism in the decisions surrounding the preparations that followed. Everything we decided on symbolized this precious man we loved and adored.

So, yesterday, the 7th anniversary of his home going, we knew it was part of God’s master plan for Mom, Karen and I, to go through Mom’s things that we’re deciding on “keeping or letting go” before her move to Karen’s. Like my Sweetheart went through a transition time to heaven, no doubt Mom is going through transition time. It’s no longer sensible for her to live on her own, so we’re helping her “let go” of so many treasures and so many memories that she and Dad had for over 53 years together. Transition isn’t a “piece of cake”. It’s coming to grips with the “past is the past” and it’s time to move on. Mom is doing her best to move on, but we’ve learned, oftentimes the hard way, that pushing her isn’t the thing to do. I understand that. Her “normal” is changing and giving her the freedom she needs to stay in some form of control, we’ve learned, is best.

Yesterday, it was Mom and I going through her nightstands that contained so much memorabilia AND symbols that opened the door for many stories of where and who “that” came from. It was reading notes and then having to make the tough decision to keep or let go. It took over an hour to go through one drawer. We had so many priceless moments together. I surprised myself because I’m a typical “get-er’-done and be done, kind of gal” – but that is not the case with a 95-year old who isn’t thinking about time and “doing”. It was definitely time and “being”. On this day (the anniversary of Ron's promotion to heaven), God’s timing was perfect for us to be captured with precious memories that symbolized my Sweetheart’s and Mom's son's life.

We would find so many mementos that were symbolic of this beautiful man on this day. Mom pulled out a book and inside was this bookmark where Mom had written “Ron’s Silence” 11/16/10 – yesterday’s date of Ron’s passing. Obviously, God directed her to this book to be read on this day which talked about “stilling our bodies and minds in order for God’s Spirit to communicate with our spirit.” These words assured her that Ron’s inner and outer quiet during the many days of his illness, was him in a holy place of “the secret place of the most high”. We ran across the train of Karen’s bridesmaid dress that she wore in our wedding, 51 years ago. Mom ran across many hand-written cards and notes from Ron to her. We opened a clothes bag and there was Mom's "Run for Ron" t-shirt that we wore in our "Movement of Gratitude". All of those sweet items were remembrances – symbols – precious times of love, laughter, family, sacred holy times, full-of-life times.

Thank you, Father God, for your "hugs" from heaven on a day of celebrating your beloved son, Ronald Jonathan David Wuerch. Thank you for choosing me to be the love of his life and for me to be welcomed into that love – not only from him, but his entire family. Thank you for Mom who has been Mom to me from the start. Thank you for the journey of faith that began as children and carried us through the thick and thin times -- to that place of destiny and purpose until You call us home. Thanks for the memories!

It Starts With the Family

As part of the leadership team on retreat for an upcoming event next weekend, we were privileged to have Tulsa’s new Bishop, David Konderla, as our guest speaker. At the end of his talk, we had the opportunity to ask him questions. One of the questions asked was “What comments would you give regarding the upcoming election?” I liked his “straight to the point” approach. “Know the party’s candidate and platforms and vote for the one which aims you the closest to what you believe is God’s heart. Our role is to make the world a better place.” What he responded to in the next question made clear sense about what our roles should be. “As women, what can we do to support you?” His response was “You are women who are in charge of your families. Beat them every day, boys twice daily….just kidding.” LOL! Then he said, “Teach your children to love being a productive citizen – that will be the foundation for who they are and who they will become. The people we vote for in an election come from families. Home is their first training school.”

I loved that. Think about it. Every one of our politicians came from families – either they were taught the Golden Rule or they weren’t. They were taught character, honor, respect, human dignity…..or they weren’t. Family values involve all those qualities of how we want to live our family life, and they are passed down from previous generations. They help define the way we behave in various situations, help us make right and good choices, and they solidify the bonds we have together. If our family members respect each other – chances are very good, they’ll respect others. If they live by “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” that’s how they’ll treat others. If they support each other, they’ll support their fellow man. If they respect their family’s lives, they’ll respect other lives.

I learned character from a young age. I remember when I was just a little tot finding some wrapped candy on the floor in the grocery store and slipping it in my pocket. My Mom marched me back to the store to apologize for the error of my ways. That day, I understood the value of honesty. So much so, that as a grown woman, I will still give back change if the cashier gives me too much.

VALUES are those specifics that define who we are and are the absolute non-negotiables in our lives. When God made us, He planted within us certain things that we value deeply. They’re hardwired in our heart. Through our life experiences – from the environment we are raised in, the schools we go to, the friends we associate with, and the religious foundation we receive, God made them clear to us. These are the things that we would be willing to die for. They explain how we come by our personal priorities. If our values are on the side of the 10 Commandments, God’s Word and God’s love….I’d say, like Bishop Konderla said, “We’re making this world a better place.” What if we could see into the future as to where our children would land? Would that vision help us with being the examples of strength, integrity and honor to them? What if we were the only measure of rule they knew? Perhaps it’s time for us to look inside our 4 walls instead of peeking into others and judging them.

Love begins at home. It's not how much we do, but how much love we put into that action. -- Mother Teresa