In it for the Long Hull aka Long Haul

While Ryan and Shawntel have been away a few days, I’ve stayed here with their boys. I loved big brother, Bear, his girlfriend, Hannah, and oldest brother, Braden, and his wife, Ruth, hanging out with us. My heart has been filled with love. Four boys in this Wuerch family here in Austin – so I must tell you about the joy and fun it was to have some “girl” time, talking girl "talk". It was easy to talk that talk because of the family wedding this weekend.

Ruth, my grandson Braden’s wife, my “granddaughter”, is a triplet. The last of the triplets married her dream man on Friday here in Austin. Of all the places in the world where these two sisters would end up is here in Austin. The wedding had been planned for a later date, but they couldn’t wait any longer. They married in a sweet and intimate outdoor setting (the groom’s parent’s home) here in Austin. Pictured here is Rebeca, her new husband, Ben, and that’s my Ruth, the Matron of Honor, behind her. Photo with Braden, Ruth, Rebeca & Ben includes the third triplet, Ruben, who is a Navy Officer, with his wife. Covid kept them from traveling.

We three girls oohed and aahed at the tender and precious moments as Ruth played the wedding video for us. Both bride and groom had written their own vows, so beautifully said through tears and laughter. My heart was touched seeing this strong man, cry his way through almost the whole wedding. He was marrying the love of his life. The three of us teared up when Rebeca, while saying her vows said “I must stop a moment so I can make a vow to someone else”. Rebeca walked over to Ben’s younger sister and vowed to love her, protect her, and care for her all the days of her life. That’s when the tears flowed from everyone at the wedding and we three girls who were enamored by the beauty of that special moment.

I always love hearing the words from I Corinthians 13 that most often are heard at weddings. The minister started with these words: “Love is patient. Love is kind. Love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way. It is not irritable or resentful. It does not rejoice in wrongdoing. But rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.” As soon as the minister started speaking those words, it started to rain and, so the next words were: “I’ve been told on many occasions that rain is a sign that the marriage will be long and enduring. I think we’re looking at a couple who are going to celebrate 75 or 80 years of marriage.” That is when a pause came to reconvene under the patio. Moments they’ll never forget for those 75 or 80 years to come.

Now, with great expectations, Ben and Rebeca have begun their lives together. I’m so faith-filled that I believe their vows before God of loving, caring, sharing, and helping-each-other-reach-their-full-potential marriage will be blessed by God. A beautiful rite-of-passage that once were two hearts, are now one. As I type this blog, I pray those words for my readers today – to remember 1 Corinthians 13, with those love words, and to do a self-analysis. “Is our love still defined by the words of St. Paul? If not – then why not begin again to remember and put those words first place for the long haul? Ben’s last name is Hull – so that was the theme of the wedding “In it for the long Hull”. I pray the long Hull and long HAUL for them and you, too!

This Good Guy Wears a White Hat

This is my son, Larry. Technically, he’s my son-in-law, but we’ve called him our son from the get-go. It is a term of endearment. He called us mom and dad. We were proud to call him our son.

Last month, I had the joy of travelling with him and Staci in their truck and 5th-wheel RV to Red River, NM. On the way to Red River, we made a pit stop in Amarillo, TX to eat at the Big Texan Steak House, – known for their 72 ounce steak. If you eat it all in one-hour, your $72 meal is free. We didn’t indulge ourselves in that challenge, but we sure enjoyed eating their delicious food. What many don’t know is while Larry attended Texas A&M, he was a real cowboy working cattle, riding horses with other ranching responsibilities. So, what’s a guy to do when we’re passing through cowboy country and Cavender’s Western Store, but to get himself a white Stetson cowboy hat that I must say “Looks mighty good on him, and for that matter, I think he’s a dead ringer for the Marlboro man!"

Even before the white hat, Larry was one of those good guys. He is kind, compassionate and quick to meet the needs of others, including me. He is a fully devoted follower of Christ and is an incredible role model for others.

I remember the good ole' days when good manners, courtesy, concern for each other, patriotism, and respect were the norm. In reality, those qualities are still right here. They may not wear white hats, but there are those white-hat-wearing-kind-of-people.

Deep inside of most everyone is a "white-hat-wearing", loving and kind somebody. But something caused them to be just the opposite -- maybe their upbringing, their lack of a value system, their choice of friends? What was it that changed them from "loving God, standing up with their hand over their heart while singing our National Anthem, respectfully loving others and living with kindness and honor"? It’s hard to believe how polar opposite we can be. I get that people are afraid, angered, upset, and confused about this world we live in, but we can do our part to at least change "our little world" if we want to.

We can lean in closer to God Who can change us and make us new. He is delighted to give out "white hats" to His kids. We can be committed Christ followers Who replace our meanness for kindness and our ugly talk to love talk. My Mama said it best, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all!"
My Mama and Mother Teresa had a lot in common when it comes to loving and caring.

Here's the way Mother Teresa put it:
“People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway. If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway. If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway. The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway. For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”
― Mother Teresa

You, know, I think Mother Teresa must have owned a white cowgirl hat because she sure did talk the talk and walk the walk that most of those folks in white hats seem to do. I'm thinking I need to go on a shopping spree for a white hat!

Only if Life was like a Hallmark Movie

I am STILL a Hallmark movie fan. Weekends, especially, you’ll often find me indulging in yet another Hallmark movie. Why, you may ask? So many reasons! They’re peaceful and calming. People are pleasant and kind. Their lives are focused on family, friends and doing good things. They’re wholesome and non-violent. The storylines revolve around love and happiness. But mostly -- because they always have happy endings. Who doesn’t like happy endings, especially when it comes to love?

We all do. But, the reality is happy endings aren't always guaranteed. Because of real life. Real relationships. Real people. Real problems. Relationships fail, friendships struggle or end, divorces happen, loved ones pass away, and true love often seems hard to find. When real life happens, we often feel disappointed and alone, especially during this month that is hyper-focused on love and romance.

Speaking from a gal who has been without the “romance” side for several years now, I know that earthly relationships should never be what determines our happiness. If our happiness hinge on earthly love or perfect relationships, we’ll always feel disappointed and, quite possibly, unhappy and lacking joy.

But, really I do know romance without a romantic lover. I experience that romance daily -- along with peace, joy, and even happiness through my relationship with Jesus Christ. He is the one constant that always assures my REAL life will have a forever after, happy ending. He shares about His unconditional and endless love for His children in John 15:9: “I have loved you just as My Father has loved Me. Stay in My love.” Jesus calls us to realize how much we are loved, just as the Father loves His Son. Oh, let’s breathe that in and embrace the intensity AND the immensity of that love.

In John 15:11, Jesus explains why it’s so important to recognize, and abide in His love: “I have told you these things so My joy may be in you and your joy may be full.” You see, it’s His love alone that can bring true joy to our hearts. God’s joy is the real love we all long for, but sometimes we look for and expect to find it in all the wrong places.

It would be oh, so nice if life were like a Hallmark movie and every relationship ended happily ever after. But I’ve learned it’s possible, each day, to be joy-filled and to feel happy no matter what’s happening in my life -- regardless of my relationships status. I know the true joy from God that is the “hallmark” of being a fully devoted follower of Christ. You can know this joy, too, if you’ll give your heart and life to THE ONE Who hears the desires of our hearts and Who fillls us with joy and happiness every day. His love is enough!

The Good Guys Wear White Hats

Lately I've been honing in on being a Good Samaritan or in Texas, we would say "being one of the good guys that wear white hats”. My Texas nephew is one of those good guys. This is Robert and Becky Wheat. I stay amused with following him on Facebook. He proudly wears his white hat most all the time except when he’s in church – and he’s in church a lot, as a beloved Texas Baptist pastor. And, he is always finding great photo opportunities to spot the hat in a location that makes for a hilarious and/or meaningful FB post. I had a great time scrolling through his FB timeline to snatch some of his photos. You’ll see wit and his passion for Christ in them. He is definitely one of those good guys that wears a white hat -- he is compassionate, kind, sensitive and is quick to meet the needs of others. I’m so proud of him and his love for Christ, his heart for sharing the Good News, as well as being an incredible role model for others. He makes me want to get a white hat – if that could help!

I remember the good ole' days when good manners, courtesy, politeness, compassion, concern for each other, patriotism, kindness, respectfulness, graciousness, consideration, and thoughtfulness were the norm. In reality, all those qualities are still right here. It's easy to recognize those who have those qualities. They may not (literally) wear white hats, but they are those white-hat-kind-of-people out there. Let's face it -- times really haven't changed that much because there were always those who leaned toward the wild side -- the mean, ornery, and disrespectful side -- those who could find something negative in every situation, instead of looking for, finding the good and even BEING the good..

Deep inside of most everyone is a "white-hat-wearing" loving and kind somebody. They came into this world "wearing a white hat" -- well, sort of. They were pure and precious. I often wonder what happened to those pure and precious babies who eventually lost their "white hats"? What is in their past that created someone so opposite -- their upbringing, their loss of a value system, their choice of friends? What was it that changed them from "loving God, respectfully loving others and living with kindness and honor"? It’s hard to believe how polar opposite we can be. Upbeat, celebratory and happy or rivalry, nasty, and bitter. I get that people are afraid, angered, upset, and confused about this world we live in, but we can change "our little world" if we want to.

We can lean in closer to God Who can change us and make us new. He is delighted to give out "white hats" to His kids. We can be devoted followers of Christ Who replace our meanness for kindness and our ugly talk to love talk. My Mama said it best, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all!"

My Mama and Mother Teresa had a lot in common when it comes to loving and caring. Here's the way Mother Teresa put it:
“People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.
If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway.
If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway.
The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway. For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”
― Mother Teresa

You, know, I think Mother Teresa must have owned a white cowgirl hat because she sure did talk the talk and walk the walk that most of those folks in white hats seem to do. I'm thinking I need to go on a shopping spree for a white hat!

He’s the God of Time & the God of Timing

My two mini-me’s and I planned all week for this day. It is girls-day-out. The husband/dad is out of town, so it is a perfect set-up. But, first order of the day is taking Emma (their Yorkie) to the vet to see after a little health issue. That sets us back on getting to Neiman’s Mariposa for our favorite chicken broth and popovers by 11 am. We arrive in the Neiman’s parking garage, park, and an older woman is waving for our help. She has locked her keys in her car, her cell phone is dead and she is distraught about getting to her daughter to go school-shopping with her. She is in tears, apologizes for being so emotional, and taking up our girl-time. She asks to use our cell phone.

We accommodate her and because she is a bundle-of-nerves, Staci takes over making calls to her car dealership down the road for coming to help her. I go into my comforting mode and assure her that it is God’s perfect timing that we show up at the time she needs us. It is by no accident that we get to be the ones to assist her. We know that. We calm her by praying with her. I tell her we are thrilled to be Good Samaritans to her. She says, “Oh, I must not be a Good Samaritan because I don’t think I could do what you are doing. I’m not as kind as you are. I wouldn’t stop to help someone, but I am a Christian.” She tells me where she goes to church. I reply: “You will be a Good Samaritan, too, because the example is set for you today by our getting to help you."

It is piping hot outside. We are all “glistening” from the heat. She continues to try to persuade us to go inside and get out of the heat. We refuse to leave her alone. She is immensely concerned that she is spoiling our day – especially for Alexia. We assure her she is not. Soon her daughter shows up, along with the locksmith. As we are handing her over to the others, she pulls out $100 and asks Staci to give it to Alexia. We refuse to take it but she is insistent with tears in her eyes. Staci explains to her that last night they prayed that Alexia would be blessed today with extra money for some great deals we’ll find “thrift store shopping” (Alexia's absolute love as she gets name-brand items, redesigns them, using the sewing machine I bought her for her birthday last year). I'm so proud of her skills and wise-spending.

After a delicious lunch, we head to The Star (the Dallas Cowboys headquarters), where Payton works as a real estate associate at Monarch Realty. We took him soup and popovers. He gives us a grand tour – perfect for photo opportunities. After that, we head to the thrift stores and Alexia is delighted with her finds. She’s not ashamed at all of thrift sale buying – she knows a deal when she finds it. It was a God-perfect-timing day.

I share this exhaustive story with you today because I want to emphasize that God is not just the God of time and eternity…He is the God of timing. When we take on our daily roles as His servants on a mission each time we step out of our homes, we are clocking in to God’s assignments, set-ups, not only getting to give and be His hands and feet extended, but we are positioned for His blessings to land on us when we least expect it. Maybe it's time to clock-in to His schedule -- get in-sync with God's perfect timing. It’s a great place to live, walk, talk, and be His ambassadors.

The Keys to a Happy, Lifelong Marriage

It’s not often that I would post someone else’s words verbatim, but when I heard these (on audiobook), I knew I had to share them with those I love most. They opened my eyes to my own marriage, the struggles we had early on, the ups and downs we encountered and though our journey became sweeter as the years went by, we would have surely saved ourselves so much angst and been on a faster track by following, applying and living by these beautiful keys. If you’re still blessed to be married, I encourage you to print these out and start living by them – especially when it comes to the bumps in the road along the way. You know – when you’re sleeping on the edge of your bed so you don’t touch your loved one or when you’re giving each other the silent treatment…..again or when the “D” word comes up in your conversation or when you or your loved one’s words become less than praiseworthy. These keys are from Karen Kingsbury’s book, “When We Were Young”. The book is so real, raw and relevant to our day and times. I transcribed them to share with you. Here are “The Keys to a Happy Marriage”:

1) Keep God first. By loving God more than your spouse, you will always be humble enough to love your spouse more than humanly possible. This makes for a beautiful marriage. Matthew 6:33 -- “But seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things will be added to you.”

2) Divorce is not an option. From the beginning, remove the word “divorce” from your vocabulary. People do not look for a door where one does not exist. Mark 10:9 -- “Therefore what God has joined together, let no man separate.”

3) Marriage is not 50/50. There will be days when one of you falls short. Make it your goal to give 100% every day. That way, you’re both covered. Everyday forever. Colossians 3:23 -- “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart as working for the Lord.”

4) Know your spouse’s love language. People speak love in different ways: gifts, acts of service, words of affirmation, physical touch, intentional time. Figure out how to speak to each other so that the love between you will grow. Romans 12:9 -- “Love must be sincere.”

5) Expect the best of each other. Forgive easily. Attitude is everything in marriage. Look for ways to humbly be kind to your spouse. Keep short accounts. Don’t worry about being right. Ephesians 4:2 -- “Be patient, bearing with one another in love.” Colossians 3:13 -- “Bear with each other and forgive one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

6) Keep dating. Your marriage must be a priority. Seek God first, then your spouse. Never stop dating and pursuing each other. Value and celebrate your love. Song of Solomon 3:2 -- “I must seek the one my soul loves.”

7) Build each other up. Kind words are free. Look for ways to encourage each other. Every day. 1 Thessalonians 5:11 -- “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up.”

8) Laugh often. Find reasons to be silly. Smile and be lighthearted. You’ll laugh about it later so make up your mind to laugh about it today. Proverbs 17:22 -- “A cheerful heart is good medicine.”

9) Live within your means. Couples who get in debt, stay stressed. Living within your means can be great fun. Take walks. Play board games. Visit your park. Clip coupons. Hebrews 13:5 -- “Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have.”

10) Fix yourself. Not your spouse. Work to be kinder and gentler. Be the person your spouse married. Listen well. Be intentional. Matthew 7:3 “ -- Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in
your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?”

And my own final words for thought and application to you: Live like there is no tomorrow. Live with no regrets. Be writing your love story every day so that when you or your loved one steps over to heaven’s side and awaits you there, you’ll carry with you so many precious memories of undying passion and love
right on into eternity. I did and I do.

Try a Little Kindness.

I was having a bit of “writer’s block” yesterday as I was looking for a word or thought to inspire me for this day’s blog. I walked out onto my screened in patio and saw the wall hanging that the previous owners left behind. “Think deeply. Speak gently. Love much. Laugh a lot. Work hard. Give freely and BE KIND." I thought, "That's a great mission statement for anyone!"

I really do endeavor to live those words daily – some days I’m right on – and not so much on other days. Each one of those phrases is a sermon in themselves, but the one that stood out on this day was BE KIND. Kindness is a word that should be proclaimed in neon lights. It's a word we could sure use a lot more of these days.

On Monday, a precious 94-year young friend in Tulsa, Thelma Moore, received her promotion to heaven. This gracious and KIND woman was a mentor and role model in faith and class to me. I saw her last at her long-care facility in April. She didn't remember too much about our time together because of memory loss, but it didn't matter. I remembered. I remember her always complimenting and encouraging me when I was the president of our women’s ministries. I smiled when nurses or aides would come into the room and even then would introduce me as her most beautiful and dearest friend that she grew up with, who lived near each other and went to church together. There were some gaps in those memories, but no worries......I remembered this KIND and loving woman. Kindness sticks. It leaves a mark on our lives.

I’ve personally known kindness in action. I’m thinking about the kindness of my children’s friends in Austin who invited me over to their home for dinner and another couple who took me out to dinner when my children were out of town. I’m reminded about my next door neighbors who watch over my property like hawks while I’m out of town and alert me if I’ve left my garage door open AGAIN. I’m thinking about the kindness that my children and grandchildren show me when I show up at their homes. Since my daughter’s family is nearby and I see them so often, it should be no big deal when I come in the front door, but each and every time, I’m treated like royalty walked in. Each one of them gets up from where they are to rush to me and give me hugs like it had been months. I have best friends in Tulsa who have a room available for me to stay with them. On my next trip to Tulsa, I’ll be staying with a friend from the community I lived in – the one that let me stay in her home for over six weeks before my move to Texas. Talk about kindness! Kindness comes in so many different forms.

Kind words and kind actions are like kisses from heaven. I am forever grateful for those who have been kind to me, spoken grace and encouragement into me. My mind is flooded with examples as I am sure you can reflect on encounters from your own life where a kind word ministered more deeply than the speaker could have ever imagined. Those kind words from others have caused me to realize that every day I have the opportunity to let kindness pour out from me. I want to be the person who is sensitive to God’s prompting when He nudges me to be kind and to speak kindness into the life of another.

If you’re reading this post, you are probably one of those kisses from heaven to me, because you embrace me, empower me, motivate me and are SO KIND to me when you “like” or “love” one of my posts, when you take the time to comment brings me so much joy. From the bottom of my heart…..I thank you!

In the words of Glen Campbell’s old song, maybe we should all “Try a Little Kindness”:
You've got to try a little kindness, yes, show a little kindness.
Yes, shine your light for everyone to see.
And if you'll try a little kindness and you'll overlook the blindness,
Of the narrow-minded people on the narrow-minded streets.

What Kind of Influencer Are You?

A few days ago my daughter told me about an unfortunate incident at the tennis courts in their community. A young man was "hogging" one of the courts and refused to allow other residents in the area to play. Typically, there is a one-hour game play, and when others are waiting for the court, the players let others take their place after an hour. Not in the case of this young man. He was adamant that he didn't have to quit, and his nasty attitude was seen by many people wanting to play. Before long, the father of that young man showed up and, likewise, his attitude was even more offensive than the son's. Obviously, the young man was influenced by his disagreeable father. Like father -- like son.

Let's think about what kind of an INFLUENCER we are to those around us. Do we influence others to be better, act better and live better lives by the way they see us living ours?

Here's a way we can measure: We go throughout our day and people get to know us and they see how we treat those around us....from our children, to our spouse, to our co-workers, to the cashier at a store -- we're being watched in how we act (and react) in situations of calm, as well as those of stress. Do we act entitled or are we kind, generous and compassionate, whether we focus on THEM and give them our undivided attention (put down those cell phones!), or not. And also....if we're meeting someone for a lunch or appointment, are we showing up on time? Do we respect the time of others? All of that life example matters.....and it speaks volumes.
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Abraham Lincoln noted that "actions speak louder than words." Even his words, among the most eloquent in political history, would not have been effective if his life had contradicted his words. We don't have to be high profile, in the spotlight, or in a noteworthy position, but we do have to live in such a way that our life illustrates our faith. And our faith is best spoken by our actions.

Excellence is a biblical imperative: "And you, yourself, must be an example to them by doing good works of every kind. Let everything you do reflect the integrity and seriousness of your teaching." (Titus 2:7)

Little and big eyes are watching us daily. Our lives represent a BOOK of manners, courtesy, honor, integrity and character that others need to see and become. What does your book look like?

What Does Your Book of Influence Look Like?

Are you an INFLUENCER to those around you.....and what does that "influence" look like? Does it influence others to be better, act better and live better lives?

Here's a way to measure: We go throughout our day and people get to know us and they see how we treat those around us....from our children, to our spouse, to our co-workers, to the cashier at a store -- we're being watched in how we act (and react) in situations of calm, as well as those of stress. Do we act entitled or are we kind, generous and compassionate, whether we focus on THEM and give them our undivided attention (put down those cell phones!). And also....if we're meeting someone for a lunch or appointment, are we showing up on time? Do we respect the time of others? All of that stuff matters.....and it speaks volumes.

Abraham Lincoln noted that "actions speak louder than words." Even his words, among the most eloquent in political history, would not have been effective if his life had contradicted his words. We don't have to be high profile, in the spotlight, or in a noteworthy position, but we do have to live in such a way that our life illustrates our faith. And our faith is best spoken by our actions.

Excellence is a biblical imperative: "And you yourself must be an example to them by doing good works of every kind. Let everything you do reflect the integrity and seriousness of your teaching." (Titus 2:7)

Little and big eyes are watching us daily. Our lives represent a BOOK of manners, courtesy, honor, integrity and character that others need to see and become. What does your book look like?