Remembering Yesterday and Yester-Years

It’s early Sunday Morning, Father’s Day, and I’m taking in the sound of the melodious rainfall. I look out my back window and my eyes go right to that yellow rose bush being watered from heaven. Don’t tell me otherwise! Sure, I know there’s scientific reasons for rains, but on this day, Father’s Day, I’m imagining my “love” reminding me he remembers – and so do I.

That little yellow rose bush has fully bloomed twice this season already, and here it goes again. Of course, it reminds me of the man of my dreams and my reality – my sweet husband and the father of my two children, the grandfather of my seven grandchildren. Oh, how blessed we were to have known and loved this man. Our wedding included yellow roses, every home we ever lived in (even the two homes since his passing on) has had a yellow rose bush planted there. When my babies were born, yellow roses were at my bedside. So, of course, the rain and the yellow roses compounded my awareness that he isn’t here, but, oh, yes, he is. He lives so big in our hearts.

Just a memory to spark so much gratitude for those little things in my life, that on a day like this, I can rejoice and be glad and not sad. Oh, how I would love for him to still be here with me enjoying our family together. He’s not – but I am. I’m not done imparting the best of me, the best of us, to these I love.

My crew in Austin sent me photos of their fun times and this crew in Frisco, celebrated with huevos rancheros for breakfast, online church, Hutchins Barbeque for lunch, piano serenades from Payton, and great fun playing the fishing game that Papa gave Payton 13 years ago. What a day! Yes, we would have rather been real fishing, but since we couldn’t, the game brought back some of the best memories.

I’ve loved the photos many of you, my social media friends, posted of their dads and husbands – those who passed on, those still alive and well, and even those who have a baby “still cookin' in the oven”. I know your journey and my journey may be completely different, but if we'll all practice gratitude and watch for all the sweet kisses from heaven like I did when I heard the rain and saw those yellow roses, you, too, will see the beauty all around you. You'll laugh with children, you'll start being a light to others, and you might even dance in the rain. It's been raining a lot lately, so why not put on those dancing shoes -- and DANCE?
“You have turned my mourning into dancing; you took off my sackcloth and clothed me with a garment of joy.” Psalm 30:11

The Chapters of My Love Story

The first chapter of my love story began when I was a little girl seeing the adoring love that my mom and dad had for each other. I witnessed their sweet affection for each other. In fact, my dad couldn’t keep his hands off my mom. “Roscoe, QUIT!” she’d cry out when he was waaay too affectionate in public for her very prim and proper ways. They were my first example of true love. I think that’s why I’m a hugger today! Be forewarned!

The next love chapter was the love of my boyfriend who became my precious husband a few years later. What a wild and crazy adventure we took on by marrying when we hardly knew anything about life, but we kept practicing and before long, we had learned many trial-and-error lessons. Actually, we never did stop learning about life and each other.

Then, turn the pages to the love chapter of starting our family -- 3 months into marriage. Love took on a whole new meaning when it produced our most treasured possessions – our two beloved children. We hardly knew how to take care of ourselves, never mind two children. I apologized to them many times for my mistakes along the way. In remorse, I'd say: “Please forgive me! I’m new at this!”

We wrote many chapters in our many years that followed: the right things to do to show love; things NOT to do that takes love tokens out of our “love” bank; setting a good love example for others to follow, and loving each other for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and health until death parted us.

I began a new love chapter yesterday when I witnessed God's love in human form. As I arrived at Children’s Hospital for my volunteer work, this precious, beaming boy, in for new x-rays, came to me with this Valentine. I teared up as I told his mom that she was doing such a great job in guiding her boy into being kind to others. A radiologist came by and loved on me with words and action. My sweet girl took me for lunch and gave me these beautiful yellow roses. She knows her daddy and my love story so well. Our wedding included yellow roses and we have had yellow rose bushes planted at every home we’ve lived in. Later at home, my doorbell rang and this gorgeous floral arrangement, that could easily fit at the front of a church, arrived from my son with words “You will always be my first sweetheart!”

I love to give love, and I’ve learned to receive love. I’ve learned that compassion sowed, is compassion reaped; kindness given is kindness received. Through God's great LOVE example of the gift of His Son to us, you and I can be that someone to someone else. We are chips off the ole' block -- and our BLOCK gave to us BIG TIME. Yesterday I was the recipient of God’s love through others. Tomorrow, I plan on planting love and compassion and kindness – not to receive, but to give. I assure you, however, God just can’t help Himself. When He sees His kids taking after Him, He just pours it on for us even more. Every chapter of my love story is interweaved with God’s great love for me. BTW -- yours is too!

So Much Heaven-on-Earth Packed Into One Day

On Saturday, Bryson and I started with breakfast at Ollie’s – a Tulsa family favorite since our first grandson was born 26 years ago. Of course, we had to make some memories there – so many trains running around the walls of the restaurant along with train memorabilia everywhere.

When my oldest grandson came to Tulsa not long ago – he had to go there for “old times sake”! It's a must-see for your children and grandchildren!

Then it was spending the day with Great Granny, Aunt Karen and Uncle George. Bryson was the kingpin. So much love packed into one little boy in one day!

The best part of the time was a baking class and making a chocolate cake Now, Bryson and I have the step-by-step recipe indelibly imprinted into our minds, on paper, and on photos. So much joy seeing Great Granny in her element. Oh, how Bryson loves his Great Granny – just loves to sit in her presence. Then it was playing the Game of Life while I went to church.

This day's Grand Finale was breathtaking. It was my joy to be the confirmation sponsor for the oldest daughter of my precious Tulsa “Anderson” Family. My husband and I "adopted" the whole family years ago. Owen, son #2, is my godson and now this special blessing. What an honor to be asked to walk her life journey with her. Bishop David Kondrela anointed Grace and declared “Be sealed with the Gifts of the Holy Spirit.” I love the beauty, the sacred ceremony and the “knowing” the day and the time of this beautiful sacrament forever.

I knew heaven was a part of this most sacred and beautiful time as I saw the gorgeous “yellow roses” floral arrangement at the altar. I like to think my sweetheart had something to do with them and, in fact, was a part of this special day and occasion. Yellow roses were the flowers at our wedding. Every home we lived in, after that, we planted a yellow rose bush and for every special occasion, I received yellow roses from my sweetheart.

"Heaven on earth" is when we pause to bring worship from earth to heaven and then God brings heaven to earth. When we take time to be thankful for the journeys, whether they are winding and twisting, or 4-lane smooth highways, and have gratitude in it all, heaven shows up on earth. Any time we pray, “Father, let your Kingdom come and your will be done on earth as it is in heaven,” we’re asking God to declare the truths of heaven into this world.

I know what heaven on earth is and every day I invest my time in looking for and living in my heaven on earth. Yes, one day, I'll get to graduate from this earth to heaven, but I sincerely believe God delights in our appreciating the heaven we can have daily as we commune with Him and let Him make His presence known in every facet of our lives. This day was about “heaven on earth” moments. I recognized them all. I savored them all and now I’m blogging and posting and I’m hearing that God just may have used me to encourage someone to start experiencing heaven on earth in your daily living.

Yes, all those "heaven on earth" times sure makes this journey so sweet on the way to "heaven in heaven". Every day, we can make the choice to have "heaven on earth" moments. Maybe it's time to take stock in YOUR "heaven on earth" blessings, too!

What a Day This Has Been!

"What a day this has been. What a rare mood I'm in -- why it's almost like being in love. There's a smile on my face, for the whole human race -- why it's almost like being in love!" Old song that I was singing at the end of yesterday!

That's because I sat out to live out loud with others, yesterday, on our 51st Wedding Anniversary, instead of having any woe-is-me moments. Too much "living and loving" opportunities! I knew God would have me on assignment this weekend. Friday afternoon I drove to Tulsa, gave hugs to my precious mother-in-law and headed out for a night with the girls -- my dear single women friends in Hyde Park, where I lived here in Tulsa. What a great time we had catching up! I loved hearing that most of these gals have found their "home" church with a pastor they respect and love, attend regularly and are continually inviting others to join them. They've become missionaries! That makes me smile so big.

Yesterday morning, Mom declared "I woke in up in the middle of the night because my toe was hurting so much. I sat on the side of the bed and looked at the clock. It said 3:16 -- John 3:16 -- I said 'Thank you, Lord, for giving me your one and only Son. By His stripes, I am healed!" I love it. She knew God was loving on her at 3:16 am! What a blessing it is to have these sweet times of "heavenly" love together! Mom continues to be such an inspiration to me and everyone else!

I headed out to meet with my two "walking" buddies from when I lived here. We walked and prayed back then, and yesterday, I rejoiced at so many answers to those prayers. In particular, my friend whose daughter recently gave birth to twins -- a double miracle and answer to our prayers.

My next assignment was to go visit my precious friend and mentor, Sister Marie Pierre at St. Joseph Monastery. She hadn't been feeling well (she's 88 now), and I think my little visit and our time talking about God's goodness perked her up. I was thrilled to help her with a project she's working on, and love on her -- and her making me so loved. She loved my husband so much, so it was perfect to visit her on our anniversary.

As I left Sister Pierre, I saw an Estate Sale sign, and I stopped to check it out, and I'm so glad I did because, here on my anniversary day -- when my sweetheart always gave me yellow roses, along with planting a yellow rose bush at every home we've lived in, as well as yellow roses being our wedding flowers -- was this porcelain yellow rose that called out my name. I knew God nudged me to stop to be romanced by Him and my Sweetheart. Of course I bought it. I knew it was heaven-sent!

After taking Mom a meal from Cracker Barrel, the finale of my day was Sheila Michie's, my dear friend's birthday celebration. What joy it was to be a part of this night of blessings -- in particular, seeing my sweet friend with her adorable grandson, who is full of energy and joy, lots of singing and laughter, as well as meeting the priest that my Hyde Park girl friends say "is the best" -- small world -- that he would be a friend to my friends and show up for this night of celebration!

I'm here to tell you -- we have choices to make everyday. The choice to be an introvert and stay within our walls and give ourselves pity parties for what we don't have, or we can go from person to person, home to home, street to street, and city to city -- to spread good news -- that Christ came to give us. Eternity awaits us....but why go there until it calls our name. Why not LIVE STRONG, in the Land of the Living as long as God gives us breath on this side of eternity?

"Where would I be if I did not believe I would experience the LORD's favor in the land of the living?" Psalm 27:13

He’s Still Looking Out For Me

Yesterday, I was filled with so much thanksgiving, yet a little weepy, missing my Sweetheart on our 50th Wedding Anniversary. That’s how I roll. I purpose to live with joy, peace and thanksgiving, but there are still those tender times of sweet memories that bring a few tears to my eyes (yesterday, a few more than usual), and then I pick myself up by the bootstraps to get on with the assignment God has for me each day. My sweet kids had beautiful yellow roses for me. They know how much those yellow roses meant to us. I embraced the calls, text messages and FB messages that celebrated this special day with me. Thank you so much to my precious friends and family who embraced me, virtually AND personally. I strongly felt my Sweetheart's love -- in huge measure, and the chain of events that followed let me know "He's still looking out for me.

On Wednesday, I drove to Frisco and at Sherman TX, my car's air conditioner went out. Hello, Texas heat flash! Five minutes after it stopped working, Staci called and said, “Mom, is everything alright? Payton just called from the church and said, “What’s going on? I feel like we need to pray about something.” I told her about the a/c and she said she’d call Payton back and tell him and his friends to pray for me. They did pray and Payton passed the prayer on to me “Nana, God stated in Genesis that we have dominion over all the earth, and that includes car problems. We all come together in the spirit right now and bless you with all the knowledge of Jesus Christ with us. Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ is with you always and we can all count on Him to save us. May you be healed from this adversity. Amen."

I truly believed that prayer. After all, “NOTHING is impossible with God”. Thursday morning I headed to the closest Buick dealership. When I arrived, I was amazed at the courtesy that was shown to me by the service reps. Fortunately, at 62,000 miles, I had purchased an extended warranty on my car. When the service rep, Brett Taylor (my knight in shining armor shown in the photo here) drove my car into the garage, he noticed my brakes were squeeshy so he recommended that they be checked, and he noticed that my car had a “recall” on the tailgate and they would see after that, as well as seeing after the a/c – all at no charge except the $50 deductible. By now, I felt like I was at the doctor’s office and the doc was making sure I was in tiptop shape from head to toe. I was getting quality and geniune customer service. How refreshing! I told the rep about some disappointing experiences at my dealership back home and I was assured that wouldn't happen here.

Because of the extensive work needed, a valet driver took me home. Later I found out there were way more issues and needed replacement parts in the vehicle than a mere a/c issue (i.e., replaced steering gear, rack pinion, replaced both front struts, replaced other parts, as well as a new a/c motor). All those parts were nearly $5,000 in vehicle repairs. On Friday afternoon, the rep said, "Miss Donna, I just got the approval from corporate to cover everything. We'll start to work on it all tomorrow morning at 7 am.” That would be Friday morning, July 8th, our wedding anniversary.

Am I so naïve to believe that a vehicle a/c going out could result in a $5,000 blessing? I’m not naïve. I am faith-filled and convinced in my Heavenly Father’s love and promise to me: “ALL THINGS….work together for good to those who love God……” Romans 8:28. AND, to add to that, I’m quite sure that my Sweetheart is STILL looking out for me, and how much better he can do that from his front row seat in the grandstands in heaven than here on earth.

"Jesus replied, "If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, 'Be uprooted and planted in the sea,' and it will obey you." Luke 17:6

July 8th, 1966 -- Happy 50th Wedding Anniversary to Us!

50 years ago today, I married my best friend and the love of my life, and I am grateful for every second of it. I miss him today – more than ever. This day is one we looked forward to -- to get to celebrate the commitment we made 50 years ago to love and cherish each other until death do us part.

Those two young kids, so in love, had no earthly idea what was ahead for them. We loved and we cherished for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health and though the words said “until death do us part”, the “until” part is incorrect. Beyond death, I still love and cherish that beautiful man that loved and cherished me for the 44 years, 4 months and 8 days we had together (plus the 5 years we had together from ages 12 and 13 – we married when I was 17 and he was 18). There weren’t many things we would do without the other, but this time, God’s plans outweighed our plans. One of us got their “early departure ticket” for heaven. He earned it, and God was ready to give him His best!

Yes, we came upon the “in sickness and in health“ part sooner than we could have imagined. Was it 44 years of wedded bliss? Heavens, NO! It was 44 years of a whole lotta beautiful times, but also a whole lotta tough times. Much of this young girl’s dream for “happy ever after” went by the way side – probably in the first week of marriage. LOL! My sweet husband worked a full time job, carried a full load of college hours and I worked at a $1.25/hour job to help make ends meet. Then at 3 months of marriage, my Sweetheart – the daring, bold and audacious risk taker that he was, announced, “I think it’s time we should start our family!” Bada bing, bada boom – 9 months later we had a beautiful baby boy that added to the mix of our young, naïve “happy ever after” world.

Probably the most challenging part of our first year of marriage was that we were two kids, flying by the seat of our pants, learning each day what love and forgiveness were all about. We’d argue about some of the craziest things. Oftentimes our quarrels were more like siblings than husband and wife. Our two kids learned the word for those quarrels was “discussions”. LOL! Oh how I remember the many times when I had to go to God for help with being a gentle, loving and sweet wife. I remember well, sleeping as close to the edge of the bed as I could get because I wanted him punished for something so insignificant. We had so much to learn.

As I posted a couple of weeks ago, however, our CENTER was God. We were always (eventually – sometimes later than sooner) drawn back to His words about LOVE in 1 Corinthians 13: “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.”

Heads up for the newcomers, and those who have made it for several years, bottom line – marriage is NOT easy. There are some really serious issues that come with the territory. That’s why we needed divine help. The vows that we said on our wedding day, 50 years ago, were real to us. We made vows before God, and we continued to call on Him for strength to make it through those times. We found that whatever the situations were that we faced, God was ALWAYS there to help us through it. None of our issues fazed God in the slightest. And best news of all – He could handle it. So much so, that our journey became sweeter and sweeter as the years went by. The depth of our love and respect for each other became pure gold. And, gold is the symbol for 50. I like to think that while my sweetheart walks on streets of pure gold today in heaven, my life continues to be filled with so many golden nuggets that include my family, friends and most of all, God’s love and peace that keeps this girl cherishing this GOLDEN journey of faith!

So, today, July 8th, 2016, I’m thanking you, Father God, for loving me so much that you showered your blessings upon me to the fullest. Knowing how our story together would end….I’d do it all again….and I’d say “yes” again and again. And to show how thankful I am…..I’m going to continue strong on this amazing faith journey, make more memories with our family and friends and continue writing many chapters in my journal that celebrate LIFE on this side of heaven…..until the day I get to join my Honey at HOME!
Happy 50th Anniversary, My Darling!

In His Presence is Fullness of Joy

Wednesday morning, November 17th, 2010, I posted this paragraph to FB:

"My Honey, Angel, Sweetheart, Confidant, and Best Friend is having breakfast with Jesus this morning....and I'm sure it's the "All You Can Eat Buffet"! We're celebrating his homegoing last night. I know he was given the "royal treatment" -- red carpet, anthems playing and choirs singing. Thanking God for His tender mercies that made this journey so sweet and precious. And, yes, WE WON!"

And now I recollect this day:
My Honey went "home" at 6:57 p.m. on November 16, 2010. Now it was the day after, and it was already time to begin the preparations for his homegoing celebration. Yes, that's what we'd do -- celebrate his life and homegoing by showing our respect for this wonderful man, with festivity and rejoicing. We asked God to guide each step we'd take in this day.

Symbolism plays such a vital role in our worship to God -- no matter what religious affiliation we may have -- our hand gestures, religious icons, candles, and other various forms of worship. And, likewise I would find so much symbolism in the decisions surrounding the preparations that followed. Our first appointment was with Hayhurst Funeral Home. Jack Hayhurst (Jackie, to me) is the owner/director, and I was his baby sitter when he was five years old. It made perfect sense -- since I took care of him -- he'd take care of my Honey's earth suit -- his body -- for a few days. My daughter, Staci, Ron's sister, Karen, and I would be there, to make the important decisions. Such peace pervaded us. There was no dread or fear -- just lighthearted discussions about this beautiful, precious man that loved, and was loved by so many. We answered all the important questions about his life, funeral desires, and then, what I most did not look forward to was selecting his casket. As Jack opened the door to the casket room, and to my surprise, my concerns were null and void. I felt complete peace once again as my eyes immediately were drawn to a cherry wood casket. We knew that it should be the one --it so represented the part of my Honey's life as a carpenter-contractor-builder, and the wood matched our kitchen cabinets at home -- the home that he restored, like so many lives he had ministered to in his life -- restoring and making something beautiful out of dysfunction and brokenness.

From there, we went to the florist -- Toni's Florist -- Toni Garner is a member of our parish and her generosity and support to our Women of the Madalene (our women's ministries group) and to our parish, once again, made perfect sense to handle the flowers. Yellow roses would be my first choice. That is what we had in our wedding 44 years ago. Since then, whatever occasion we celebrated, my Honey would always buy me yellow roses and we had yellow rose bushes in our garden area at home. Every Spring and Summer we were reminded of our love for each other when we saw the yellow roses blooming. Four yellow roses would represent our children, Larry, Staci, Ryan and Shawntel, and six smaller yellow roses would represent each of our grandchildren in the floral arrangements. And since it's Fall and the Thanksgiving season, the balance of the arrangements should include harvest colors -- oranges, reds, yellows, browns -- mixed with Fall colored leaves. Our eyes gazed at the Christmas decorations already displayed so beautifully throughout the shop. The little bird Christmas ornaments drew our attention, and we thought "how ideal it woud be to have them amidst the arrangement -- to represent our sweet, precious grandchildren". Toni wanted that to be her contribution -- five brown birds for the boys and one little hot pink bird for our one granddaughter. And the final addition, were two red hummingbirds to place on the arrangement from me -- a special representation of the hummingbird feeder that was hung just outside our bedroom window that Ron loved to watch so much.

Our final appointment of the day was with Father Jack, who we could tell, had already spent a considerable amount of time praying for just the right message to be left to our family and friends about my Honey. Ron and I were both raised in evangelical protestant families, rich with the training and love for God's Word. That was our foundation. Now, for 26 years we had been a part of the Catholic Church that rounded out who we have been and who we love now so passionately -- along with the beautiful faith community that we have come to love so deeply. We knew that those who attended the funeral would be from various religious backgrounds -- Protestant, Catholic and many in between -- but the most important objective -- would be my Honey's ultimate goal in life -- to see unity among all of God's kids. "How about Ryan (our son) opening the service?" was Father Jack's first question. "He can explain Ron's heart to see unity in the Body of Christ". Perfect. And when he asked what Old Testament reading we would like, Staci immediately responded, "Isaiah 58" -- Dad's personal mission scripture that was at the heart of his mission in life: 'And you will be called the repairer of the breach, the restorer of the streets in which to dwell."' His desire was always to be a peacemaker, restore relationships, and bring about healing in hurting lives. That is what Isaiah 58 talks about. Yes, that would be the one. Then the scripture from Psalm, Psalm 23 -- The Lord is My Shepherd scriptures -- so appropriate, because that is where he has been for many months -- lying down in green pastures, resting beside the still waters so that his body and soul would be restored. And finally, the Gospel reading that I knew was the one: John 12:24 "Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit." I know that in my Honey's graduation to heaven, the many seeds he planted into so many individuals' lives would be the fruit of this tremendous grain of wheat. And during the bringing forward of the gifts in the service, Payton, our 10-year old grandson would play the piano -- another symbol of the "bearing of fruit" -- Papa was a grand pianist and now his fruit is borne in his grandson.

It seemed everything was being orchestrated by God….and my Honey. When Staci, Mom, Karen and I went back to the funeral home to see my Honey after they had him all ready for viewing, I was expecting to shed a few tears when I would see his body. But as we walked into the viewing room, the first words I thought, "This is not Ron! He is not here!" All I saw was that earth suit that he had lived in and it was not him any longer. We knew, instantly, that he would want everyone to remember him as he was -- full of life, joy, encouragement, peace and strength. The casket would remain closed from then forward. That's the way he would want it -- besides, as someone exclaimed, "No one could get his hair perfect enough!" He always received comments about his "perfect" hairdo!

And the next day, when we had family visitation time at the funeral home, we knew our decision was the right one, as visitors came to express love and condolences, they saw a family that had been undergirded, wrapped in and bathed in God's peace -- the presence of God was there in that room. There was joy and laughter -- no sorrow -- no mourning. We really were at peace. As Psalms 16:11 states, "In Your presence is fullness of joy, at your right hand there are pleasures forevermore." The celebration indeed had begun -- in our lives, our hearts and our spirits. Deeply we have sensed the sweet presence of God throughout our faith journey -- and now, even more, realizing this joy we feel comes from that Peace -- the Prince of Peace in our lives.