A Different Valentine's Day

It’s 5 am, Valentine’s Day morning. Nothing new about that. That’s my usual get-up-and-go time to first thing post my blog for this day. But, something’s different about this day.

It’s 28 degrees outside – the coldest morning so far this year here in Frisco. And, I’m all geared up in my husband’s ski-pants, my ski jacket, ski gloves and Alaskan fur hat (all are about 30+ years old). I’m out walking pint-size, Miss Emma, at 5:15 am. She hears me make a tiny noise when I get up and she is raring to go do her business outside. BTW, Miss Emma is my Wallace family’s "super cute", 5-pound Yorkie. Her brother -- burly, hairy, 75-pound Australian Shepherd, Buddy, took to the road in the big truck and RV with the Wallace’s the day before. And, I, who normally have only the responsibility of myself to make it through the day – has this girly-girl Emma for six days until Alexia, my granddaughter, flies back home and resumes Miss Emma's caregiving.

Donna, why don't you just let her out in your back yard to do her business? My backyard is sitting in so much water from all the rain we’ve had recently. My mistake.A bath was called for to get rid of the wet mud. I know you're laughing at this dog saga and me – the one who admits to only being a dog-liker, not a dog lover. At my young, but ripe age – it’s a lot of love for my family that gets me out of my routine for little responsibilities for living beings (including plants). But the walks and having someone to talk to is good medicine on this Valentine’s Day. After all, I could be a wimpy, whiny mess. But, not me! I’m on assignment!

As I’m walking this girl, I think about this “lovers” day. No lover, but a compact, 11-year old, Yorkie (Thankfully, in dog years, she's older than me!). But, I leave her side to re-enact some Valentine's memories when my Sweetheart and I typically enjoyed going out for a movie and dinner together. So, I do on this day. To top it off, I come home to beautiful flowers from the Wuerch's and along with the pooch hand-off, the Wallaces give me a sweet card and a $25 gift card.

I think of the novelty of having my Sweetheart with me in my heart AND little Emma with me. This photo is a cherished one of Emma and Papa snoozing. How could I complain that he got to go to heaven much earlier than we expected? His race was finished on this side of heaven and mine is still ongoing.

I’ve had a love of my own, you see. I would NEVER want to bring him back, but, one thing’s for sure, I am determined to be with him in heaven someday. So, I’m purposing to live each remaining day as if it is my last day on earth. That means I’m endeavoring to spend each day wisely, acknowledging the Lord in prayer, spending time in His Word, worshipping Him, serving Him, loving others, AND loving this 5-pound Yorkie.

I am celebrating love with all of you lovers out there. I urge you to live in the moments and treasure the moments God has given you. Please don’t take those moments for granted. Be brave and faithful and true. Cling very close to each other and make everyday sweeter than the day before. I promise you -- you'll be so glad you did -- especially when your only companion happens to be a 4-legged friend!

Grown with Love

“Nothing Says ‘I Love You’ more than an Orchid. Give your Valentine a gift that is as unique as they are. With graceful, arching branches, and exotic flowers. Orchids are easy to care for with blooms that last!” Those were the words and this is the image that Calloway’s Nursery sent to me in their email a couple of days ago. Really? “Nothing says ‘I Love You’ more than an Orchid?” Oh, contraire! Yes, maybe as a token of love but nothing says “I love you” more than actions that speak louder than words AND orchids.

That nursery got the title right “Grown with Love”. Because love – real sacrificial, all-in love and devotion and holding true to vows we’ve made, preferring each other above ourselves, serving one another, cherishing the most precious gift given to us……is grown. Day-by-day, year-after-year. And, I promise you – love WILL grow daily when God is the CENTER of the love we share with each other. He’s the sunshine, the rain, the fertilizer AND the tender-loving-care that makes that “first love” last forever.

Of course, I’m referring, first, to married love, but I’m also referring to the love we have for ourselves and others. Did you know that loving ourselves is such an honor to our Creator? He was meticulous in handcrafting us and giving us those freckles on our noses and those lanky or chubby legs? He designed us with His absolute plan – from our mother’s wombs and His love has only grown for us. I’m still growing in my love for myself – which is a work of art – when yet another wrinkle pops out and another ache comes in this young body. But, love it is – it is the gift of life that God gave me so I’m expressing gratitude for every day I can use this jar of clay for Him.

Of course, Valentine’s generates thoughts to lovers and romantic relationships. But why don’t we take it up a notch and determine that Valentine’s is about love for everyone we encounter? Sometimes we get so caught up in our daily routines, we forget to let those close to us know how much we love and appreciate them and thereby, growing that love.

Love is as simple as smiling at someone walking toward us, someone in front or behind us in the checkout line or someone standing next to us in an elevator. Sounds innocent enough, but what we really can be doing is secretly telling them “I love you” with that smile. It may be the difference maker in their life. “What the world needs now is love sweet love” -- thanks, Dionne Warwick, for that reminder, but thanks be to God for His example of LOVE: “For God so LOVED the world that He gave His only begotten son…” John 3:16.

How about we make a commitment to “grow our love for others and then give it away” -- maybe in a love letter to those people in our life who inspire us, support us, assist us, feed us, nurture us, care for us, pray for us, protect us, laugh with us and cry with us? They have shared the magnificent journey of our life with us. So, to put an exclamation point at the end of the title “Grown with Love” -- let's purpose to grow the love in our corner of the world. Let me start by saying "I LOVE YOU”, my FB friends and family. You mean the world to me! You make my world such a sweet place to live and love. You put a smile on my face and you give me so many joys! May you know God's love in tangible and beautiful ways....not just Valentine’s Day, but ALWAYS!"

1 John 4:7 "Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God."

The Chapters of My Love Story

The first chapter of my love story began when I was a little girl seeing the adoring love that my mom and dad had for each other. I witnessed their sweet affection for each other. In fact, my dad couldn’t keep his hands off my mom. “Roscoe, QUIT!” she’d cry out when he was waaay too affectionate in public for her very prim and proper ways. They were my first example of true love. I think that’s why I’m a hugger today! Be forewarned!

The next love chapter was the love of my boyfriend who became my precious husband a few years later. What a wild and crazy adventure we took on by marrying when we hardly knew anything about life, but we kept practicing and before long, we had learned many trial-and-error lessons. Actually, we never did stop learning about life and each other.

Then, turn the pages to the love chapter of starting our family -- 3 months into marriage. Love took on a whole new meaning when it produced our most treasured possessions – our two beloved children. We hardly knew how to take care of ourselves, never mind two children. I apologized to them many times for my mistakes along the way. In remorse, I'd say: “Please forgive me! I’m new at this!”

We wrote many chapters in our many years that followed: the right things to do to show love; things NOT to do that takes love tokens out of our “love” bank; setting a good love example for others to follow, and loving each other for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and health until death parted us.

I began a new love chapter yesterday when I witnessed God's love in human form. As I arrived at Children’s Hospital for my volunteer work, this precious, beaming boy, in for new x-rays, came to me with this Valentine. I teared up as I told his mom that she was doing such a great job in guiding her boy into being kind to others. A radiologist came by and loved on me with words and action. My sweet girl took me for lunch and gave me these beautiful yellow roses. She knows her daddy and my love story so well. Our wedding included yellow roses and we have had yellow rose bushes planted at every home we’ve lived in. Later at home, my doorbell rang and this gorgeous floral arrangement, that could easily fit at the front of a church, arrived from my son with words “You will always be my first sweetheart!”

I love to give love, and I’ve learned to receive love. I’ve learned that compassion sowed, is compassion reaped; kindness given is kindness received. Through God's great LOVE example of the gift of His Son to us, you and I can be that someone to someone else. We are chips off the ole' block -- and our BLOCK gave to us BIG TIME. Yesterday I was the recipient of God’s love through others. Tomorrow, I plan on planting love and compassion and kindness – not to receive, but to give. I assure you, however, God just can’t help Himself. When He sees His kids taking after Him, He just pours it on for us even more. Every chapter of my love story is interweaved with God’s great love for me. BTW -- yours is too!

Kisses -- Sweeter Than Wine

“Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth — for your love is more delightful than wine.” How’s that for a Valentine’s Day opener? Sounds like something out of a romance novel, doesn’t it? It is way more. It is straight from God’s Holy Word, the Song of Solomon 1:2. God intended us to know romance so He showed us love in all dimensions – from Solomon’s wife’s love for her husband to His unrelenting love in giving His own Son’s sacrifice of love for us.

But what happens to that first love and those times of longing for being together and not being able to keep our eyes and our thoughts off of each other? Complacency happens. The fire we had at first becomes a flicker. We've lost our "first love".

Of course, today, I think of my first “puppy” love story. He was all of 13 years old and I was 12. It was a “by telephone” courtship. Eventually, we were strategizing for our first kiss. The only time we saw each other was at the church his dad pastored on an occasional Sunday night. On the phone, he asked, “When can I kiss you?" Me, being shy and senseless of romance in any way gave little input, but he already had a plan of action. “How about after church next Sunday night, behind the church?" Oh, my! I couldn’t sleep or think straight, especially when Sunday night came. After service, we headed outside to the darkness in the back of the church. He took me in his arms, threw me back like an old movie scene and planted a big one on my lips while his breath mint slipped into my mouth as we almost lost our balance. We heard his dad call out for us and, he ran one way around to the front of the church and I ran the other way. We were proud of our inconspicuous scheme. ;-)

That led to many years of loving to kiss, holding hands, and snuggling close – until the day of his graduation to heaven. I know that after many years in a relationship, the fire of first love tends to grow dim. I’d like you to think that our marriage was all marital bliss, but there were many times it faltered. It happens in marriage, and it happens in our relationship with God. In Revelation 2:1-7, John the Apostle wrote to the Ephesian church that had been faithful and hardworking, but he warned them to “remember their first love for God".

In the middle of this Valentine’s Day when love is up front and center, and whether we’re single or married, we are wise to go back to our first loves -- with our spouses AND our first love with Jesus. We can return to those first words of love and affection, service and obedience, amazement and appreciation. Oh, that we would still hunger and thirst again to be in God’s presence like we couldn’t get enough of our sweethearts in the beginning – when we were first in love. We can lose the passion and fervor in our marriages and in the same way, for God. We can accept the status quo and let the fires that once intensely burned, die.

Believe me, now that my sweetheart is up there and not here, I’ve thought about the times I was too busy or preoccupied or uninterested in my husband’s affection. My sweet married friends, don’t lose that first love for each other. Cherish your moments together. Rekindle your first love. Go on dates and remember what it felt like in the beginning. And, the same is true for rekindling our first love and our relationship with God.
May we remember how God went the distance to restore us, redeem our life and for being our forever love.
Happy Valentine’s Day!

The Month of Love Can Be “Bah Humbug”.....if we let it!

Everywhere I look there are reminders: "This is Love Month!". Since my sweetheart is long gone from this side of heaven, I could shut my eyes, allow myself to be pitiful and think "Please March, get here quickly!" But you’ll notice I refuse to go there, so much so that I intentionally post about love this month.

You see, February 14th has been a precious day for me since I was 12 years old. Well, maybe even before that when we decorated shoe boxes for receiving Valentine cards from our schoolmates. Up till February 14th, 1961, the cards I received from boys were slim-pickens. But from 1961 until 2010, Valentine's meant the world to me. My Sweetheart and I had our first "date" on Valentine's (ages 12 & 13) and every year since then, we made it "our" special day. I fully understand, however, why many wish there wasn't so much emphasis on love and lovers -- especially if they don't have a significant other.

But, every year, I purposely decide to defeat those thoughts as soon as February rolls around. Rather than being wimpy, I purpose to be energized, strong and determined. I embrace this whole month and call it a Month of Love -- focusing on giving out love daily, expressing my appreciation for friends, family and ESPECIALLY, my Father God -- the greatest LOVER of all.

I'm sharing my thoughts with you about "Valentine's NOT being Bah Humbug". I checked my heart on it before this month rolled around. And look at how God intercepted my thoughts. These photos are of a Valentine's "Love" brunch given by some precious women from Dwell Church. The homeowner emulates the beauty of being a Martha who serves with excellence and a Mary who worships at the feet of Jesus. I was so grateful to be included in this special celebration that she went way out of her way to show her love to us. Everything was done meticulously with excellence from the "love" signs that greeted us to the handsome servers from the church who welcomed us with a lovely punch, a ticket, and a sweet "love" magnet.

Their living area furniture was moved to their bedroom. Can. You. Speak? Reminders of love were everywhere and the brunch was par excellence. Check out that chocolate fountain bar. How blessed I felt when she gave a gorgeous orchid plant to me and another widow. I sensed my sweetheart looking down from heaven and applauding. To top it off, the tickets were for the gorgeous centerpieces filled with candy hearts and roses, and my number was drawn. I tried to give it away for someone else, but they insisted I keep it. Truly I sensed God's favor. He keeps on pouring it on!

I like to think that this sweet day was a gift for turning up the love burner in my month. It was a “give and it shall be given” gift to me. So, I will continue to NOT fall for the "IF ONLY" lie. You know, "IF ONLY my sweetheart was still here, IF ONLY I had a boyfriend, IF ONLY I had a romantic husband." "IF ONLY" can do quite a number on our hearts. That’s why I’m determined to replace my "If onlys" with "I ams". I AM loved by God. I AM so thankful for the beautiful people He has placed in my life. I AM rich in God’s mercy and grace. I AM so happy that I love this LOVE season because I am reminded to amp up my love for God and others. 1 John 4:19 explains it this way "We love because He first loved us."

Welcome February -- It's the LOVE Month!

It’s the LOVE month and I’m especially in my heaven-to-earth love mindset as I’m back in Austin and getting to have a lovefest with my boys. Twelve year-old Bryson, who is the outdoors guy and I spend a lot of time outside. It’s my joy to be his assistant when feeding his many animals. I asked him if he was getting tired of seeing after them. His response “NEVER!” Yesterday we went for a hike through the trails of the acreage and then watched him show my his bow and arrow efficiency in the back acres shooting thrown-out pumpkins. We hung out by the creek while doing his schoolwork in a cozy place out there and at break time – he showed me his skills using his daddy’s BB gun that we bought him when he was Bryson’s age. Be still my heart! Bryson’s daddy still holds onto a childhood memory.

Brennan is my sports guy – baseball and basketball. What a blessing it is to be so close to them to watch many of his games. They won their basketball game last night and my Brennan scored 12 of the winning points. Love is definitely in the air when I get to hang out with them, as with all of my grandchildren.

Of course, when February rolls around, it’s automatic to think of Valentine’s Day and the opportunity to share our love to the one or ones we hold near and dear to our hearts. I’m sending out that love to you, my FB and Blog friends and family. My sister and brother-in-law were married on February 14th. I am always nostalgic during this month because on February 14th, 1961, my boyfriend (and 5 years later, my groom) and I went on our first real boy-girl date, chauffeured by his dad and mom to my church’s youth Valentine's banquet. This month has always been the "Love Month" to me, and though my sweetheart celebrates it in heaven, I still celebrate it here with those I hold dear.

Of course, this month is dedicated to lovers and romantic relationships. But why don’t we take it up a notch and determine that February is a LOVE month for all those around us? Sometimes we get so caught up in our daily routines, we forget to let those close to us know how much we love and appreciate them. There’s nothing more important than letting people know how much they mean to us.

So, why not let this be a LOVE month with everyone we encounter? Love is as simple as smiling at someone walking toward us, someone in front or behind us in the checkout line or someone standing next to us in an elevator. Sounds innocent enough, but what we really can be doing is secretly telling them “I love you” with that smile. And, if they smile back at us, let’s imagine them saying “I love you” back to us. That silent exchange may cause feelings to emerge that could transform their day AND our day.

So, since February is the month for love, how about we make a commitment to “give our love away” – maybe in a love letter to those people in our life who inspire us, support us, assist us, feed us, nurture us, care for us, love us, pray for us, protect us, laugh with us and cry with us? They have shared the magnificent journey of our life with us. Let's purpose to pour on the love this month....and let me start by saying "I LOVE YOU.....my FB friends and family. You mean the world to me! You make my world a better place. You put a smile on my face and you give me so many joys! May you know God's love in tangible and beautiful ways....not just this month, but ALWAYS!"
1 John 4:7 "Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God."





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2 YEARS AGO TODAY

Happy Valentine’s Day, Old AND Young Lovers!

My word for today is "Valentine’s Day" – a day that St. Valentine gave his life for; recognized as a significant cultural, religious, and commercial celebration of romance around the world

Valentine’s Day is one of my favorite days of the year because it holds one of my most precious memories. On this day, the cutest dark haired 13-year old boy named Ronnie (aka Ron) Wuerch and me, the lankiest, 12-year old girl had our very first “official” date (chauffeured by Ronnie’s dad) to a Valentine’s Banquet at my church. The photo here is that day – when Ronnie had to stand on the step above me – because I was taller than him. Oh, how I remember the butterflies in my stomach, the sweaty palms, and the pride I had in showing off my “boy friend” to my friends. At thirteen, Ronnie was already an accomplished pianist with an amazing voice. He played the piano and sang at the banquet. I thought I was the luckiest girl in the world when my girl friends said, “He sings and looks just like Frankie Avalon!”

It was a complete set-up by my grandmother – of all people. She invited my family to their church where Ronnie’s dad was the pastor. Right from the start, that cute boy kept looking and smiling at me….and I smiled back. A few days later, Grandma called me: “Ronnie Wuerch says he likes you.” And, I replied, “Tell him I like him, too!” And that’s the way we began. Early on, my grandmother and our mothers knew (you know – that woman’s intuition), that we were meant to be. And we were.

This day is about lovers and I like to give credit where credit is due. This is the story of St. Valentine's Day. Valentine was a Christian priest who lived near Rome during the time of Emperor Claudius II, a sworn enemy of the faith. In the beginning, Valentine had won the emperor’s admiration, but lost it – and his life – by trying to convert Claudius to the faith. On February 14th, 278, the emperor was so outraged by Valentine’s unwanted evangelism AND because Valentine was secretly marrying Christian couples against His edict that he had Valentine tortured and beheaded. It is said that just before Valentine was led away to his execution, he wrote a note to the blind daughter of his jailer, whose vision was restored after he prayed for her. According to legend, he signed his note, “from your Valentine.” Hence, the tradition of sending Valentine cards.

I wonder what St. Valentine would make of this day of celebrating love. Would he laugh hilariously at all the chocolate, flowers, hearts and expressions of affection that lovers share, or would he cry at all the expense without a true increase in genuine love -- especially when it would be so beautiful if this day would really increase our love for each other.

Perhaps he would appreciate it all and maybe he would express his feelings by quoting St. Paul, whose wisdom he revered: “Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.” Romans 12:9

Thank you, St. Valentine's for reminding us, ABOVE ALL -- to LOVE. I am celebrating love with all of you lovers out there on this beautiful Valentine's Day. I urge you to live in the moments God has given you. Treasure your moments together. Please don’t take those moments for granted.

And for all of you.....can I gently remind you of an important truth? A truth that makes all the difference to me? If we are God’s children, we are involved in the greatest love story ever created. God created us, knows us inside and out, and loves us from the top of our heads to the tips of our toes. We can celebrate love this year just like everyone else, knowing that we have a deeper understanding than anything that’s advertised or on the shelves in a store. GOD LOVES US!

Happy St. Valentine's Day to all my FB friends! God loves you so much AND so do I.......<3 <3 <3

FEBRUARY – The Love Month

My Word of the Day is FEBRUARY – defined in Webster’s dictionary as the second month of the year – ordinarily containing 28 days, but with 29 days in leap years. No big deal. How did FEBRUARY make my Word of the Day list? Because I’m adding a definition from Donna’s dictionary – it’s the month of LOVE!

Oh, I know for so many this is just another month of the calendar and, quite frankly, all the hoopla about Valentine’s Day and all that mushy stuff is just not on your radar – but just maybe – it can become the month of love for you, as it is for me.

There are several reasons I don't take this month lightly. On February 14th, 1961, my boy friend (and 5 years later, my groom) and I went on our first real boy-girl date, chauffeured by his dad and mom to my church’s Valentine's Banquet. At long last, at the age of twelve years old, I, OFFICIALLY, had a boy friend! LOL! This month has always been the "Love Month" to me, and though my sweetheart celebrates it in heaven, I still celebrate it here....with those I know and hold dear.

My dear sis-in-law and her husband will celebrate their 43rd wedding anniversary on Valentine’s Day on February 14th. Another love-match made in heaven.

Then on February 14th, 2004, my precious mama got to go to heaven and celebrate Valentine’s Day with my daddy.

Of course this month generates thoughts to lovers and romantic relationships. But why don’t we take it up a notch and determine that February is a LOVE month for EVERYONE we encounter? Sometimes we get so caught up in our daily routines, we forget to let those close to us know how much we love and appreciate them.

Love is as simple as smiling at someone walking toward us, someone in front or behind us in the checkout line or someone standing next to us in an elevator. Sounds innocent enough, but what we really can be doing is secretly telling them “I love you” with that smile. And, if they smile back at us, let’s imagine them saying “I love you” back to us. That silent exchange may cause feelings to emerge that could transform their day AND our day.
“What the World Needs Now is Love Sweet Love” – thanks, Dionne Warwick, for that reminder, but thanks be to God for His example of LOVE: “For God so LOVED the world that He gave His only begotten son…” John 3:16.

Since February is the month for love, how about we make a commitment to “give our love away” – maybe in a love letter to those people in our life who inspire us, support us, assist us, feed us, nurture us, care for us, pray for us, protect us, laugh with us and cry with us? They have shared the magnificent journey of our life with us. Let's purpose to pour on the love this month....and let me start by saying "I LOVE YOU.....my FB friends and family. You mean the world to me! You make my world such a sweet place to love. You put a smile on my face and you give me so many joys! May you know God's love in tangible and beautiful ways....not just this month, but ALWAYS!"

1 John 4:7 "Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God."

Increase the Love Dosage

This little gal is one of Bryson's friends. Her shirt inspired me -- "Do all things with love!" 1 Corinthians 16:14 "Do everything in love."

Valentine's Day ended four days ago and I wonder how many are still enjoying the outpouring of love they received on that day. And, what about those who are thrilled all the hoopla about Valentine's is over with? Whether we celebrated it or tolerated it, what matters is "Are we loving to the extent that we wish to be loved?"

Mother Teresa said, "'Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love." I think it's the same with a relationship with a significant other, as well as the stranger we meet on the street. We should love like we want to be loved. To practice being more loving, we should create a love account. If we'll make a few deposits into this account by doing something small to add joy into the life of someone else, how blessed, in turn, will we be.

Getting bogged down with daily routines is easy. Before we know it, our love accounts can be depleted, and when we should respond to those around us with love and kindness, often we might carelessly say something that is hurtful. It's up to us to live purposely in love consciousness -- making choices dictated by the ACTIVE walk of love.

What does an ACTIVE walk of love look like? It's actively walking across the street to help our neighbors, actively cooking a warm meal for a friend in need, or it's actively visiting a near-by nursing home to love on the elderly. Let's ask God to lead us to places where He wants us to shine His light and ask Him for the courage and strength to share His love with all who surround us in our daily lives.

Let's perpetuate this Month of Love by giving out HUGE doses of love to everyone we encounter. With eyes focused on He WHO is love, our "filter" will be through the love He gave to us, and we won't be able to resist loving like He loves. And, maybe when we do this, we will guide people to His beauty and they, too, will begin to actively love others and then, who knows how many lives will be impacted?

"By this EVERYONE will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." John 13:35.

Marriage is 50/50 -- That's Garbage! Love Means Never Having to Say You're Sorry -- That's Garbage!

For the last three Sundays, the scripture readings in the Catholic Church, have been from Matthew 5 which includes Christ's Sermon on the Mount. The 1st Sunday -- the Beatitudes; the 2nd Sunday -- being salt and light and last Sunday's was "stepping up our game". Well, not exactly in those words, but Pastor Samuel Hose at Emmaus Parish (aka Church of the Resurrection) here in Austin, shared words that inspired me for today's post. Last Sunday pastors and ministers everywhere probably focused, or at least mentioned in their messages, about love because Valentine's Day was coming up.

Father Samuel said. "It's time to step up our game. From Matthew 5's readings we heard Jesus talk about stepping up our game. For example: In the Old Testatment it said, 'You shall not kill or you'll be liable for judgment", but Jesus stepped up the game by saying 'Don't even be angry with your brother or you'll be liable for judgment.' He also said 'You have heard that it was said (in the Old Testament), 'You shall not commit adultery. But I say to you, he who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.'" Now that's sincerely "stepping up the game"! It put a whole new light on "just getting by with just enough Christianity to make it through the Pearly Gates". God created a whole new standard for us. Ephesians 5:1 "Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us..."

Father Samuel shared that he had performed a wedding ceremony the day before. He said, "I told the couple that people might have told you 'Marriage is 50/50'. That's garbage! Others might have told you that marriage means never having to say your sorry'. That's garbage! I tell you where you step up your game in your marriage is to recall this day when you said and made your vows before our Holy God and to each other. Your marriage will always be blessed as you recall these promises you made to each other before God. Live your life everyday before God. That will guarantee your marriage succeeds."

And, during this month of love, I add my two cents worth to what Father Samuel said. Those vows before God are the CENTER for which our marriages and our lives are built upon. When we fail to keep God at the center and we forget those promises we made to our CENTER, is when our marriage and even other relationships can become stale, lacking vitality, respect, honor and commitment to each other.

The newlyweds, my grandson, Braden, and granddaughter, Ruth, are so adorable and so in love after 4-1/2 months of marriage. But what will it be for them in 4 years, 14 years or 40 years, if they forget those beautiful vows of faithfulness, understanding, commitment, and servitude to each other -- if they forget their CENTER? I didn't see Ruth's wedding rings at the wedding, but I saw them this week. There are three. She says they represent "Braden, herself and God". Then she went on to give the scripture basis for the three bands which is a promise between God, you, and your husband. "A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." Ecclesiastes 4:12. I loved that. God is their CENTER. God is LOVE, so then, their love for each other will continually be stepped up as long as they keep Him there in the CENTER.

Is God at the CENTER of your marriage and life? If not....He can be and will be when you welcome Him into that beautiful place of FIRST PLACE! The closer we move to God....the closer we will become to our spouses and those in our lives that we love.

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails…” 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Valentine's Day -- "Bah Humbug"

I've been very intentional to post a lot of "love" messages this month. You see, February 14th has been a precious day for me since I was 12 years old. Well, maybe even before that when we decorated shoe boxes for receiving Valentine cards from our schoolmates. Up until February 14th, 1961, the cards I received from boys were slim-pickens. But from 1961 until 2010, Valentine's meant the world to me. My Sweetheart and I had our first chaparoned "date" to a church Valentine's banquet on Valentine's Day (ages 12 & 13) and every year since then, we made it "our" special day. This first photo is our first Valentine's together. Notice I was taller than him so I stood on the step below him. He eventually caught up and went past me! LOL! The next photo here is the charm bracelet he gave me the next year on Valentine's Day -- it was our 1-year "first date" anniversary! He saved up his own money to give it to me. I wear it often and count my blessings.

And, here I am, fifty-six years later, on this February 14, 2017. it's been 6 years and 3 months since my Valentine Sweetheart's graduation to heaven. I'm missing him today…incredibly, but I refuse to be sad on this day. It is not a "Bah Humbug" day for me. I've been defeating those thoughts since my sweetheart went to heaven. Rather than being wimpy, I've purposed to be energized, strong and determined. In fact, I decided to embrace this whole month and call it a Month of Love -- focusing my attention on giving out love daily, expressing my appreciation for friends, family and ESPECIALLY, my Father God -- the greatest LOVER of all.

I am NOT going to fall for the "IF ONLY" lie. You know them, "IF ONLY I had a sweetheart or IF ONLY my sweetheart was still here." "IF ONLY" can do quite a number on our hearts. Can I gently remind you of an important truth? A truth that made all the difference to me? If we are God’s children, we are involved in the greatest love story ever created. God created us, knows us inside and out, and loves us from the top of our heads to the tips of our toes. We can celebrate love this year just like everyone else, knowing that we have a deeper understanding than anything that’s advertised or on the shelves in a store.

That’s why I’m determined to replace my "If onlys" with "I ams". I AM loved by God. I AM so thankful for the people I do have in my life. I AM so happy that I love this LOVE season because I can express love to God and others. 1 John 4:19 explains it this way "We love because He first loved us."

A Valentine's Day on Earth as it was in Heaven!

This treasured photo of my beaming Mom is from my daughter's wedding day. My precious Mom was my role model, best friend and even helped me raise my kids as she lived with us for many years. She was loved so deeply by all of us.

On Valentine's Day, 2004, my husband, took Mom his "usual" -- a single rose in a vase and her favorite box of chocolates. Mom had been living at the Grace Living Center in Jenks, OK for 4-1/2 months because of a serious fall.

When we arrived at her room, Mom was still in bed. Patsy, the South Wing Nurse on duty for this day, looked up as she was taking Mom's blood pressure and said, "Edna’s not feeling too good today." I could tell she wasn’t -- she didn’t respond heartily to our greetings as she usually did, and only gave a “little” smile at Ron as he reached down and kissed her, held out the rose and said, “Happy Valentine’s Day, to my Sweetheart!" I leaned in close to her, caressed her beautiful face, and soothed her with words of comfort. I hadn’t seen “my smile” from her yet, so I did my usual coaxing, "Where’s my smile?" She gave a half-hearted little smile and mouthed the words, “I’m okay!” She had on her red plaid pajamas. I said, "I see you’ve got on your Valentine’s PJs on!” Kiddingly, Ron said, “Hey, Mom! Come on. Get up. Let’s go to the mall. We'll take your silver Cadillac (her wheel-chair!)” She always knew when Ron was jesting with her and today was no exception. She responded back by her typical sticking-out-her-tongue at him.

Everyone who knew her, knew how she loved to “kid” and “be kidded” by Ron. She and Ron had an unusually close relationship for the 40 years we had been married and five years before that. Ron would tell anyone, “Mom and I have never had a cross word with one another – well, except when I'd have to get after her because she would be doing the kids' chores for them.

Ron’s Mom, Lydia, always came by to see Mother every Saturday. This morning was no exception. She came in and greeted her dearest friend of over 45 years. It was these two women who diligently arranged, prayed, and continued to bless the relationship of Ron and I since I was twelve, and he was thirteen, How befitting for all us to be together on this special day. While all of us were together this morning, Mom kept trying to tell me something, but I just couldn’t make out the words.

Since I had been through many physical “ups and downs” with Mom over the years, I assumed this morning would be like those from before when I would see her feeling very low, but then she'd bounce right back in just a matter of time. We all were convinced that Mom had nine lives -- she’d been so close to death several times in the last few years, but would recover and be back to her full-of-life self, spreading her love and joy to everyone around her once again.

efore leaving her this morning, Ron reached out to Mom in his customary way, joined our hands and prayed a beautiful prayer of faith for her healing, comfort and peace. We said our good-byes, gave her lots of hugs and kisses and headed out for our own Valentine's Day breakfast celebration.

After only about an hour and a half, I received a call from Patsy saying, “Donna, I’m so sorry. Your mother just passed away.” Oh, the heartbreak I felt. The questioning ensued -- “Why wasn’t I there? Why did we leave her?” We immediately went to her and she was still in the same position as when we left. Nadia, one of the dear Aides from Russia, shared that she had gone in to see if Mom wanted lunch. Being Russian Orthodox in her religious beliefs, Nadia asked Mom if she could pray with her. Mom would always accept an offer for prayer. Nadia recounted her last moments with her. She had prayed a simple prayer. She said that Mom's eyes followed her gesture of signing her with the cross. Nadia left for just a short while and came back to check on Mom and she had passed away.

After pondering the events of Mom's final moments of life, I came to believe that with Nadia's gesture of signing Mom with the cross, that Mom was able to make her grand escape. I like to think, like Jesus Christ said in His final moments, “It is finished”, so did Mom.

After someone so close to us departs for their heavenly home, God brings comfort to us by giving us thoughts and images of what heaven must be doing to welcome them. Ron said, “Papa got his Valentine Sweetheart back today!” (Papa, my Dad and Mother’s husband of 34 years, had preceded Mom in death forty years ago.) My dear Mother-in-Law, Lydia, said, “Donna, remember when Edna was trying to tell you something before we left? I know she was saying, “He’s coming for me.” For me, having been privileged to call this beautiful, precious saint my Mom (I deemed her Saint Edna Pearl long ago), who, because of her prayers, steadfastness, strength, true unconditional love for me in all of my “growing-up” years, inspired me to be a the woman I am today.

I dreamed a few nights ago that she was with me and I was making cornbread for her. When I woke up from that sweet dream, I made myself some cornbread. I like to think she was enjoying it, too, from heaven's grandstands. On that Valentine's Day in 2004, I expect that God AND my dad had a mutual agreement “Let’s bring our “Best Girl and Sweetheart” home!” And they did. They both knew how much she wanted to be with them, so they gave her the BEST Valentine's Day that would last forever and EVER!

Psalm 116:15 "Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of His faithful servants."

Welcome February -- It's the LOVE Month!

Love is in the air!! I sure don't take this month lightly because on February 14th, 1961, my boy friend (and 5 years later, my groom) and I went on our first real boy-girl date, chauffeured by his dad and mom to a church Valentine's banquet. This month has always been the "Love Month" to me, and though my sweetheart celebrates it in heaven, I still celebrate it here....with all those I know and hold dear.

Of course this month is dedicated to lovers and romantic relationships. But why don’t we take it up a notch and determine that February is a LOVE month for all those around us?

Sometimes we get so caught up in our daily routines, we forget to let those close to us know how much we love and appreciate them. There’s nothing more important than letting people know how much they mean to us.

So, why not let this be a LOVE month with everyone we encounter? Love is as simple as smiling at someone walking toward us, someone in front or behind us in the checkout line or someone standing next to us in an elevator. Sounds innocent enough, but what we really can be doing is secretly telling them “I love you” with that smile. And, if they smile back at us, let’s imagine them saying “I love you” back to us. That silent exchange may cause feelings to emerge that could transform their day AND our day.

So, since February is the month for love, how about we make a commitment to “give our love away” – maybe in a love letter to those people in our life who inspire us, support us, assist us, feed us, nurture us, care for us, love us, pray for us, protect us, laugh with us and cry with us? They have shared the magnificent journey of our life with us. Let's purpose to pour on the love this month....and let me start by saying "I LOVE YOU.....my FB friends and family. You mean the world to me! You make my world a better place. You put a smile on my face and you give me so many joys! May you know God's love in tangible and beautiful ways....not just this month, but ALWAYS!"

1 John 4:7 "Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God."

Increase the Love Dosage

Day 18 in this Month of Love -- Increase the Love Dosage

Valentine's Day ended four days ago and I wonder how many are still enjoying the outpouring of love they received on that day. And, what about those who are thrilled all the hoopla about Valentine's is over with? Whether we were celebrated or we tolerated it, it really doesn't matter. What matters is "Are we loving to the extent that we wish to be loved?"

Mother Teresa once said, "'Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love." I think it's the same with a relationship with a significant other, as well as the stranger we meet on the street. We should love like we want to be loved. To practice being more loving, we should create a love account. Each day, if we'll make a few deposits into this account by doing something small to add joy into the life of someone else, how blessed, in turn, will we be.

It’s so easy to get bogged down with our daily routines, and before we know it, our love accounts can be depleted and when we should respond to those around us with love and kindness, we,instead, carelessly say something that is disparaging and hurtful. It's up to us to live in love consciousness -- making choices dictated by the ACTIVE walk of love.

What does an ACTIVE walk of love look like? It's actively walking across the street to help our neighbors, actively cooking a warm meal for a friend in need, or it's actively visiting a near-by nursing home to love on the elderly. Let's ask God to lead us to places where He wants us to shine His light and ask Him for the courage and strength to share His love with all who surround us in our daily lives.

Let's perpetuate this Month of Love by giving out HUGE doses of love to everyone we encounter. With eyes focused on He WHO is love, our "filter" will be through the love He gave to us, and we won't be able to resist loving like He loves. And, maybe when we do this, we will guide people to His beauty and they, too, will begin to actively love others and then, who knows how many lives will be impacted?

"By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." John 13:35.

Looking for Love in All the Right Places

Getting to celebrate life with my special loved ones and friends in Tulsa brings such joy to my heart. Here's what my World of Love's "right places" looks like:

I have precious friends in the community where I live. We laugh, celebrate life, many of us pray for each other and share meals with each other. Several of us are the face of Hyde Park and we represent our community to guests that stop by to visit us. Love in the right places!

My Life Group meets in my home every Tuesday. We share our triumphs and tests, we pray together, celebrate together and do life together. The latest triumph was the birth of this precious baby girl, Ragan Rainey. We prayed for her Mom & Dad to be blessed with her, and indeed they have been. Her two grandmothers attend my Life Group (yes, that's them having received their coronation bouquet) -- so of course, that little girl had no choice but to come into this world with God's blessings. Love in the right places!

I have the most wonderful "family of friends" at Church of the Madalene where I have attended for over 16 years. The women in this church, The Women of the Madalene, are par excellence. They are the most giving, loving and caring women ever! To them, there is no task too great or small when it comes to serving God and His people. Serving with them is truly an honor. Love in the right places!

As if having a family of friends at one church isn't enough, I have a host of friends at Life.Church, which is just a half block from my home. I love serving with these precious people who rock my world (literally) every weekend. I am a part of the Host, Chazown, Baptism, and Operations Teams. Being fully devoted followers of Christ is all about "loving in the right places" -- and the greatest blessing of all is witnessing so many people coming to Christ at each service. Last Sunday, at our Jenks campus alone, over 150 people were baptized in water. Love in the right places!

Then there is my precious godson and his siblings. They are my Tulsa family -- I love these kids and their love for me blesses me so much. All of them have February birthdays -- so of course it's the Month of Love for them AND me. Owen, my godson, is a treasure beyond words to me. He sits by me in church, snuggles close to me, puts his arm around me or holds my hand. Yes, I feel kisses from heaven each time. Love in the right places!

My dear Mom-in-Law lives here in Tulsa. Mom has been such a dear friend to me for 55 years now -- 5 years before my Sweetheart and I married. She has encouraged, prayed for and loved me like a daughter. Last Sunday, Valentine's Day, we had a "Sweetheart" lunch together at Olive Garden. Of course, we talked about the two men that were our loves for a lifetime and because of the richness of those loves, we can be so thankful they're no longer in our past....they are in our future! We'll be with them again one day. Love in the right places!

Tomorrow, I'll be heading to Post Oak Lodge for the Christ the King ACTS Retreat -- Thursday thru Sunday. I was once a retreatant, but now I'm on the leadership team for the retreat. We've met every Monday for the last three months in preparation for this weekend where women will come and be made to feel like princesses -- daughters of the King. It is a weekend like no other I've ever witnessed. Encounters with the living Christ that causes all of our hearts to melt in His presence. We come to know the true meaning of loving God with all our hearts, souls and minds. Love in the right places!

AND, if all this LOVE in Tulsa weren't enough to bless this heart of mine, I'll be heading to Seattle on Monday for a feast of love with my family there for two weeks, and then back for a week with my Texas family -- no shortage of love there because it's "Love in the right places"!

People ask me "Why are you so happy all the time -- after all, you live alone, you're a widow, you have to handle life and all it gives you by yourself?" I think by now, you know. I'm still here. I'm not done with living. I celebrate each day with as much gusto as I can. Life isn't a destination. It's a beautiful, wonderful, living-life-large JOURNEY of finding love in all the right places. I recommend living this way -- self pity, whining, and complaining is not found here on this journey -- it's all about an attitude of gratitude each and every day! It's finding love in all the right places!

Valentine's Day -- February 14, 2004

Day 14 in this Month of Love -- Valentine's Day -- February 14, 2004
As usual on Valentine’s, my husband, Ron, took my Mom the single rose in a vase and her favorite box of chocolates. Mom had been living at the Grace Living Center in Jenks, OK for four and a half months because of a severe fall, which the doctor said was reason enough for her to not live alone anymore. “With her heart condition, this could happen again,” he told us.

It was a daily routine for the Nurse’s Aides to get Mom up each morning, help dress her in one of her coordinated outfits, and take her in her wheelchair to the dining hall for her breakfast, and other meals. But, when we arrived at her room (as was my daily routine anyway, but Ron went with me this morning), Mom was still in bed. Patsy, the South Wing Nurse, was leaning over Mom checking her heart with her stethoscope. Patsy looked up at us and said, “Edna’s not feeling so good today. She threw up quite hard last night. Her false teeth fell out of her mouth and the bottom ones broke!” I immediately replied to Mom, “That’s okay -- I’ll take them on Monday and get them fixed”. Mom didn't want anyone to see her without her dentures, so I knew I would have to make that a “priority” errand on Monday (this was Saturday). I could tell she wasn’t feeling good. She didn’t respond heartily to our greetings, and only gave a “little” smile to Ron as he reached down and kissed her, held out the rose in the vase and said, “Happy Valentine’s Day, Mom! Here’s my flower and chocolates for my Sweetheart!”

And, as I leaned in close to her, I assured her that she looked beautiful without those dentures, caressing her face and soothing her with words to comfort the fact that she wasn’t feeling good. I hadn’t seen “my smile” from her yet, so I did my usual coaxing, "Where’s 'my smile'?" To which, she gave a half-hearted little smile and mouthed the words, “I’m okay!” I noticed she had on her red plaid pajamas. “I see you’ve got on your Valentine’s PJs!” Ron then said, kiddingly, “Hey, Mom! Come on. Get up. Let’s go shopping at the Mall. I’ll push you in your silver Cadillac (her wheel-chair)” She always knew when Ron was jesting with her and today was no exception. She responded back to him by her typical sticking-out-her-tongue at him.

Everyone who knew her, knew how she loved to “kid” and “be kidded” by Ron. She and Ron had an unusually close relationship for the 40 years we had been married and five years before that. For many years Mom lived with us when our children were young. Ron would tell everyone, “Mom and I have never had a cross word with one another – well, except for the one time I had to scold her for allowing our 10-year old daughter to coax her into doing her chores (i.e., making her bed, emptying the dishwasher, etc.). Our daughter, Staci, would pay her fifty cents from her allowance.”

Ron’s Mom, Lydia, always came by to see my Mom every Saturday after her weekly hair appointment, which was just a couple of blocks away. This morning was no exception. She came in and greeted her dearest friend of over 45 years. It was these two women who diligently “arranged, prayed, and continued to bless” the relationship of Ron and I since I was twelve, and he was thirteen years old. How appropriate for all of us being together on this Valentine’s Day. It was “Mom” Lydia, and her husband, that drove Ron and I to our first date, which was a church Valentine’s Banquet, 45 years ago. While all of us were together this morning, Mom kept trying to tell me something. I just couldn’t make out the words.

Since I had been through many physical “ups and downs” with Mom over the last few years, I assumed that this morning would be like those from before where I had seen her feeling very low, but would bounce right back in just a matter of time. We all were convinced that Mom had nine lives -- she’d been so close to death several times in the last few years, but would recover and be her full-of-life self, spreading her love and joy to everyone around her once again.

Before leaving her this morning, Ron reached out to Mom in his customary way, joined my hand and his Mother’s hand, and said, “Let’s pray.” He prayed his usual prayer of faith and trusting in God for Mom’s healing, rest and peace. We all took turns reaching down and kissing her and telling her "good-bye". I told her I’d be back after a short while to see her. I guess I had a premonition that Mom needed extra TLC today, so I went to the Nurse’s Station and said to Patsy and the Nurses Aides, “I know you check on Mom regularly, but would you keep an even closer eye on her today, and call me if her condition changes?” They assured me that they would.

We had just gone for a Valentine's breakfast with Ron's Mom, when I got a call from Patsy saying, “Donna, I’m sorry to tell you; your Mother passed away.” Oh, the painful emotion I felt and the questioning ensued -- “Why wasn’t I there? Why did we leave her?” When we got back to the Nursing Home, the Nurses Aides were with her. She was still in the same position as when we left. Nadia, one of the dear Nurses Aides from Russia, immediately told us that she had come in to see if Mother wanted lunch. Being Russian Orthodox in her religious beliefs, Nadia asked Mom if she could pray with her. Mother would always accept an offer for prayer. Nadia recounted her last moments with Mom. She said that she had prayed a simple prayer and said that Mother’s eyes followed her gesture of signing her with the cross. Nadia left her room and after just a few minutes, Nadia came back to check on Mom, and she was gone.

After pondering the events of Mom's final moments of life. I came to believe that with Nadia's gesture of signing Mom with the cross, that Mom, like Jesus Christ said in His final moments, said, “It is finished”, and chose to "go home". Her assignment on this earth was finished.

After someone so close leaves us, we let our imaginations and deepest desires come to mind, hoping to relieve the pain of parting. Ron said, “Papa got his Valentine Sweetheart back today!” (Papa, my Dad and Mother’s husband of 34 years, had preceded Mother in death forty years ago.) My dear Mother-in-Law, Lydia, said, “Donna, remember when Edna was trying to tell you something before we left? I know she was saying, 'He’s coming for me.'" For me, having been a part of this beautiful, precious saint’s life for 56 years, (I deemed her Saint Edna Pearl long ago), who, because of her prayers, steadfastness, strength, true unconditional love for me in all of my growing-up years, caused me to be a the woman I am today. Though I miss her so much, just knowing her daily prayers of going home to be with Jesus and my Dad, were answered, causes me great comfort and joy. I think that my Dad and God had a mutual agreement on this Valentine’s Day, “Let’s bring our “Best Girl and Sweetheart” home!” And, they did.

Happy Valentine’s Day in Heaven, Mom, AND to my Sweetheart! I'm quite sure that you two are having a hay day running around heaven. What a sweet picture that is to me. You're healed, whole and celebrating God's overwhelming love! What a day of rejoicing it is for you there, AND me here!

FB Friends, please indulge me as I share these photo memories with my family and you!