The Month of Love Can Be “Bah Humbug”.....if we let it!

Everywhere I look there are reminders: "This is Love Month!". Since my sweetheart is long gone from this side of heaven, I could shut my eyes, allow myself to be pitiful and think "Please March, get here quickly!" But you’ll notice I refuse to go there, so much so that I intentionally post about love this month.

You see, February 14th has been a precious day for me since I was 12 years old. Well, maybe even before that when we decorated shoe boxes for receiving Valentine cards from our schoolmates. Up till February 14th, 1961, the cards I received from boys were slim-pickens. But from 1961 until 2010, Valentine's meant the world to me. My Sweetheart and I had our first "date" on Valentine's (ages 12 & 13) and every year since then, we made it "our" special day. I fully understand, however, why many wish there wasn't so much emphasis on love and lovers -- especially if they don't have a significant other.

But, every year, I purposely decide to defeat those thoughts as soon as February rolls around. Rather than being wimpy, I purpose to be energized, strong and determined. I embrace this whole month and call it a Month of Love -- focusing on giving out love daily, expressing my appreciation for friends, family and ESPECIALLY, my Father God -- the greatest LOVER of all.

I'm sharing my thoughts with you about "Valentine's NOT being Bah Humbug". I checked my heart on it before this month rolled around. And look at how God intercepted my thoughts. These photos are of a Valentine's "Love" brunch given by some precious women from Dwell Church. The homeowner emulates the beauty of being a Martha who serves with excellence and a Mary who worships at the feet of Jesus. I was so grateful to be included in this special celebration that she went way out of her way to show her love to us. Everything was done meticulously with excellence from the "love" signs that greeted us to the handsome servers from the church who welcomed us with a lovely punch, a ticket, and a sweet "love" magnet.

Their living area furniture was moved to their bedroom. Can. You. Speak? Reminders of love were everywhere and the brunch was par excellence. Check out that chocolate fountain bar. How blessed I felt when she gave a gorgeous orchid plant to me and another widow. I sensed my sweetheart looking down from heaven and applauding. To top it off, the tickets were for the gorgeous centerpieces filled with candy hearts and roses, and my number was drawn. I tried to give it away for someone else, but they insisted I keep it. Truly I sensed God's favor. He keeps on pouring it on!

I like to think that this sweet day was a gift for turning up the love burner in my month. It was a “give and it shall be given” gift to me. So, I will continue to NOT fall for the "IF ONLY" lie. You know, "IF ONLY my sweetheart was still here, IF ONLY I had a boyfriend, IF ONLY I had a romantic husband." "IF ONLY" can do quite a number on our hearts. That’s why I’m determined to replace my "If onlys" with "I ams". I AM loved by God. I AM so thankful for the beautiful people He has placed in my life. I AM rich in God’s mercy and grace. I AM so happy that I love this LOVE season because I am reminded to amp up my love for God and others. 1 John 4:19 explains it this way "We love because He first loved us."

Valentine's "Bah Humbug"

I don't think I explained about my Month of Love posts. It's been very intentional. You see, February 14th has been a precious day for me since I was 12 years old. Well, maybe even before that when we decorated shoe boxes for receiving Valentine cards from our schoolmates. Up till February 14th, 1961, the cards I received from boys were slim-pickens. But from 1961 until 2010, Valentine's meant the world to me. My Sweetheart and I had our first "date" on Valentine's (ages 12 & 13) and every year since then, we made it "our" special day. Since he graduated to heaven, my sweet kids send me "love" cards with precious sentiments, but you "single" girls know what I mean -- it's just not the same. You just wish there wasn't even a day where the emphasis was on love and lovers -- especially if you don't have a significant other.

But this year, I decided to defeat those thoughts as soon as February rolled around. Rather than being wimpy, I purposed to be energized, strong and determined. I decided to embrace this whole month and call it a Month of Love -- focusing my attention on giving out love daily, expressing my appreciation for friends, family and ESPECIALLY, my Father God -- the greatest LOVER of all.

Yesterday, I, along with other ladies from my church, delivered floral arrangements for Toni's Flowers. We do that for Valentine's and Mother's Day, and she is so generous to make a donation to our women's ministires. What a joy it was to see the faces on the recipients of those flowers, and Toni is so giving that she provides us with beautiful long stem roses with bows and packaged beautifully to give to those we just deemed needed a brighter day. One receptionist accepted the beautiful arrangement for a co-worker and asked "Where are these from?" I told her Toni's. She said, "I just knew it. Toni is wonderful. When my husband died, I went into her shop and ordered the arrangement for my husband's funeral, and Toni also put together a beautiful arrangement for my kids to have there. She didn't even charge me." And, I said, "As a matter of fact, Toni's is where the flowers for MY husband's funeral were from and when I found six little glass birds in her shop for my grandchildren's arrangement, she said, "That is my gift to you." Here were two women embracing the love and the memory -- just because I delivered an arrangement to that business.

After that, I took lunch to Mom and then went to the Nursing Home where my dear friend is recuperating from surgery. I spent time with her celebrating "she's still here, so God's not through with her yet" and then I prayed with her and her daughter. When I made it back to home, a dear friend from years' past called. She had no idea of my husband's passing 5 years ago. She was astounded, yet we both rejoiced in his graduation and celebrating our lives today. For nearly two hours we celebrated God's goodness in our lives.

I'm sharing my thoughts with you about "Valentine's NOT being Bah Humbug". I checked my heart on this before this month rolled around. This month, I'm looking for who I can bless. In fact, I've already made a date with my mother-in-law for a Valentine's lunch-out together. We'll be each other's sweethearts. I'm going to take communion to my friend in the nursing home. Instead of waiting to be loved, I'm making the decision to give love. I have so many friends who need to know someone is thinking about them right now. And there are wonderful ministry opportunities to reach out to those in need. There is so much joy to be had when we seek to invest loving acts into others’ lives.

I am NOT going to fall for the "IF ONLY" lie. You know, "IF ONLY my sweetheart was still here, IF ONLY I had a boyfriend, IF ONLY I had a romantic husband." "IF ONLY" can do quite a number on our hearts. That’s why I’m determined to replace my "If onlys" with "I ams". I AM loved by God. I AM so thankful for the people I do have in my life. I AM so happy that I love this LOVE season because I can express love to God and others. 1 John 4:19 explains it this way "We love because He first loved us."

God Has a Plan -- STAND!

At age 14, I was a volunteer Candy Striper at a Dallas hospital. The unique title went with the candy cane, red & white-striped pinafores that we wore. In those days, I aspired to become a nurse, so I took flowers and mail to patients, refilled their water jugs, and other incidental duties. But, those plans were dashed when I married my handsome 18-year-old sweetheart when, at 17, I graduated high school. I became an office clerk to help put him through college. The next year, I gave birth to our son. If I had it to do all over again -- I’d do it all over again -- because that was the journey that God destined for us! Looking back through the rear view mirror and living with “if only” thoughts does not serve us well. God always tells us to press on, go forward, rise and shine, and "remember not the former things" (Isaiah 43:18)!

Unexpectedly in our journey of faith, I did become an “unofficial” nurse – not as I had dreamed it to be, but one God called me to at the time. My husband had a severe staph infection that required 8 weeks of antibiotics by I.V. After brief training, I was able to give him the I.V. three times a day. I’ll admit my hesitancy to take on such a critical responsibility that I had only witnessed the "pros" (RN's) perform in the hospital. At first, it seemed overwhelming, with so many sterilizing techniques, flushing the lines, clamping and not clamping, and calculating the drip timing, but I got it down quite well.

The challenges we faced were often daunting, and Nurse Donna continued to be on duty until my sweet man graduated to heaven. But, we never wavered from our STAND of faith. God’s Word was our surest foundation in every turn of the road in our journey. We knew our faith, as well as the prayers and support of friends and family, gave us the tenacity to "STAND" and press on to the finish line. These lyrics of gospel recording artist, Donnie McClurkin, “Stand”, undergirded us. I give these words to you to encourage you in whatever role you may find yourself in -- as someone’s nurse, caregiver, companion, friend, or, even to be the one that is the recipient of the love and care - wherever your journey takes you, today, or in the future, let these words resonate within you and encourage you to keep STANDING!

“STAND”, by Donnie McClurkin
Tell me, what do you give when you've given your all,
And it seems like you can't make it through?
Well you just stand, when there's nothing left to do.
You just stand, watch the Lord see you through.
Yes, after you done all you can, you just stand.
You just stand, and endure,
God has a purpose, yes, God has a plan.

Don't you dare give up through the storm, stand through the rain,
Through the hurt, yes, through the pain,
Don't you bow, and don't bend, don't give up, no, don't give in.
Hold on, just be strong, God will step in and it won't be long.
After you've gone through the storm, after you gone through the rain,
After you done all you can.....you just stand.