In it for the Long Hull aka Long Haul

While Ryan and Shawntel have been away a few days, I’ve stayed here with their boys. I loved big brother, Bear, his girlfriend, Hannah, and oldest brother, Braden, and his wife, Ruth, hanging out with us. My heart has been filled with love. Four boys in this Wuerch family here in Austin – so I must tell you about the joy and fun it was to have some “girl” time, talking girl "talk". It was easy to talk that talk because of the family wedding this weekend.

Ruth, my grandson Braden’s wife, my “granddaughter”, is a triplet. The last of the triplets married her dream man on Friday here in Austin. Of all the places in the world where these two sisters would end up is here in Austin. The wedding had been planned for a later date, but they couldn’t wait any longer. They married in a sweet and intimate outdoor setting (the groom’s parent’s home) here in Austin. Pictured here is Rebeca, her new husband, Ben, and that’s my Ruth, the Matron of Honor, behind her. Photo with Braden, Ruth, Rebeca & Ben includes the third triplet, Ruben, who is a Navy Officer, with his wife. Covid kept them from traveling.

We three girls oohed and aahed at the tender and precious moments as Ruth played the wedding video for us. Both bride and groom had written their own vows, so beautifully said through tears and laughter. My heart was touched seeing this strong man, cry his way through almost the whole wedding. He was marrying the love of his life. The three of us teared up when Rebeca, while saying her vows said “I must stop a moment so I can make a vow to someone else”. Rebeca walked over to Ben’s younger sister and vowed to love her, protect her, and care for her all the days of her life. That’s when the tears flowed from everyone at the wedding and we three girls who were enamored by the beauty of that special moment.

I always love hearing the words from I Corinthians 13 that most often are heard at weddings. The minister started with these words: “Love is patient. Love is kind. Love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way. It is not irritable or resentful. It does not rejoice in wrongdoing. But rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.” As soon as the minister started speaking those words, it started to rain and, so the next words were: “I’ve been told on many occasions that rain is a sign that the marriage will be long and enduring. I think we’re looking at a couple who are going to celebrate 75 or 80 years of marriage.” That is when a pause came to reconvene under the patio. Moments they’ll never forget for those 75 or 80 years to come.

Now, with great expectations, Ben and Rebeca have begun their lives together. I’m so faith-filled that I believe their vows before God of loving, caring, sharing, and helping-each-other-reach-their-full-potential marriage will be blessed by God. A beautiful rite-of-passage that once were two hearts, are now one. As I type this blog, I pray those words for my readers today – to remember 1 Corinthians 13, with those love words, and to do a self-analysis. “Is our love still defined by the words of St. Paul? If not – then why not begin again to remember and put those words first place for the long haul? Ben’s last name is Hull – so that was the theme of the wedding “In it for the long Hull”. I pray the long Hull and long HAUL for them and you, too!

Love and Marriage and Love

"Love and Marriage" seemed to have been the themes in church services I attended on Sunday. The first inspiring message I heard delved into what causes divorce and one of the first reasons was because they starting saying the word “divorce”. The minister said when couples say their vows and make lifelong commitments together, then “divorce” should never be an option. He said, “From the very beginning, remove the word “divorce” from your vocabulary. People do not look for a door where one does not exist.” Mark 10:9 -- “Therefore what God has joined together, let no man separate.” Good advice!

He further said, “Every morning, wake up with choosing to bear the Fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.” Imagine
how precious marriage can be when each one is filled up with those juicy and delectable fruit.

Then, Sunday night, the minister spoke about following God’s rules. In the Old Testament, the rule to Abraham was: “I am the One True God. Follow me.” To Moses, He gave the 10 Commandments. But then Jesus came and He stepped it up. In His Sermon on the Mount, He gave the Beatitudes in which our dispositions change from the outward following to an inward heart change that says “I want to”… .Jesus said “You have heard ‘You shall not kill’, but He expanded it to ‘You shall not be angry’; Instead of “Do not commit adultery”, He expanded it to “Do not even look at another with lust” and He expanded “Do not take a false oath”, He expanded it to saying our vows mean “Divorce should not be an option. Put a stake in the ground.” Such powerful words for couples AND individuals in our desire to be faithful, true and devoted followers of Christ in our marriages and even in our single lives.

Finally, our pastor invited couples, in honor of St. Valentine’s having been celebrated during the week, to stand up. I nudged the man in front of me to stand up even though his wife couldn’t make the service. As he was standing up, Pastor said “Even if your spouse isn’t here, stand up!” So, I stood up, too! And, as he was praying over these couples and their commitments to each other and their support of each other, I realized “Oops! He was speaking to those who have LIVING spouses." I laughed at myself for standing. When the prayer was over, I turned to my friend and said, “Oops, my husband is in heaven! I assure you! We get along really well now!" Oh me!

My own final words for thought and application to you who are married: Live like there is no tomorrow. Live with no regrets. Be writing your love story every day so that when you or your loved one steps over to heaven’s side and awaits you there, you’ll carry with you so many precious memories of undying passion and your never-ending love story right on into eternity. I did and I do. Eternity awaits me AND you!

The Invitation Read: Bring Spouses

Last week, in a group text message, I was invited to a Christmas Party and the invitation read: “Bring Spouses”. Immediately a “little” pang hit my heart and I replied: “I wish!” Soon the “singles” started texting me love and stated, “We’ll have a ‘single for now’ section!” LOL! I was really being facetious because, with God's grace, I’ve adapted well to my "single” status.

Yes, “Single” is the box I check in “Marital Status” now if it doesn’t have a box “Widow(er)” to check. These photos are of the last Christmas we had with my Sweetheart, my children’s dad, and my grandchildren’s Papa, Christmas 2009. Then, I checked the “Married” box. Honestly, I’d trade every Christmas present for the rest of my life for 5 more minutes with my Ron on this side of heaven. I’d snuggle in to tell him everything he meant to me in those 5 minutes. My encouragement to you, whether you bear the “single” OR “married” status, is to value what's really important and convey the words of what your loved ones mean to you, cherish them with all your heart because it's not what comes under the tree that counts." Comfort and joy are ours when we embrace it.

I often speak or write about the seasons in our lives. We ebb and flow our way through the years, never feeling like we are always weak, always strong, always tired, always victorious. Sometimes we stand tall and we fight. Sometimes we go dormant and we rest. Sometimes we reflect and grow. We don’t have to be “on” every single day of our lives. But, dear friends, we should never believe when we’re down, we are destined to stay there. Life will ebb and flow and our seasons will change. The season of being a couple and bringing my spouse with me to an event has changed, but you know what? I changed too! I was willing to change and in this season, I’m embracing the change. I sit with my single friends, laugh and celebrate life with them. But I also sit with my married friends (some of whom are my closest friends), hang out with them, and even travel with my married friends. I’m not defined by my marital status and neither should you be. Perhaps being defined by our relationship status with our Lord, is the status that matters the most because, in Him, we are complete.

Yes, Christmas is so much more than all the tree and food trimmings, the gift giving and the holiday parties and programs. The original Christmas story was also about seasons. A savior was born into the world – with hope for all mankind -- only to grow up and face rejection, betrayal, and death. All that we go through, He’s been through. Our hurt and our joy, He knows it. After enduring death on the cross and three days in the grave, our hope rose again.

Those of you who are hurting deeply this holiday season, I am so sorry, and I pray in the midst of your pain, you’ll find many moments of hope and joy. Make the moments count with loved ones. Turn your sadness into gratitude for those in your life, still on this side of heaven. Give them the gift of you putting on a "garment of praise" instead of having a spirit of heaviness. Let's be full of joy and resolute determination to be "present" with them. What a wonderful gift to give those around us when we can offer "sacrifices" of joy in the midst of this season. We might find them in the beauty of a Christmas tree that lights a darkened room or in the kitchen with our kids or grandkids icing cookies. Maybe we’ll experience a moment of satisfaction enjoying a meal and conversation with loved ones. We may even feel a glimmer of hope at the sound of Christmas carols, the warmth of a fire, or the sight of our children unwrapping gifts. It’s tender moments like these that will sustain us.

And next year, when we’re in a new season, we’ll look back and say, "That pain almost did me in, but because of God's grace there were moments where I saw Him. Those glimpses of joy reminded me of what life could be. It’s because of those moments that I not only survived but thrived. Don't let pain rob you of God’s small graces and tender hugs and embraces. Keep your heart settled on the good news of comfort and joy!

Till There Was You -- Happy Anniversary, My Love!

Bear with me again, please as I reflect on this day, July 8th. I will always post about this special, picture-perfect day when my sweet man and I became husband and wife. We held strong for this day -- for over five years -- and then, the wait was over. What took us so long? I needed to graduate high school before we got married. LOL! My Mom had to consent and sign for me as I was still a minor, at age 17. Some said, "It will never last!" I'm pleased to say we proved them wrong.

It was a wedding-on-a-budget. My precious mother somehow managed to have just enough for us to have everything we needed. My uncle walked me down the aisle (my dad was in heaven) and my brother sang our song, "Till There Was You". I wore my sister's wedding dress. My bridesmaids paid for their own dresses. The ceremony was officiated by my father-in-law in the church he pastored. The two items that cost the most for our wedding were the flowers and the cake. Our honeymoon wasn't at an exclusive 5-Star location -- it was Lake Texoma Lodge.

And, as I type this post, I assure you.....it didn't take big expense, extravagance, explosive fanfare, or perfection to create these precious memories that I still have today. I'm remembering what mattered most on this day. Two kids who knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that they were meant to be -- that they were tying a knot that would last through eternity -- that they were in true love that would stand the test of time.

What is it that causes "until death do us part" to be the deciding factor that creates an unquenchable, inseparable, unwavering and unrelenting love that knows no end? I'm not saying that there were never hiccups along the way or many times having reasons to walk away from the pressure and strain of "making it work". But our vows said, "For better or worse" (and, believe you me....we had some "worst of times") and "For richer or poorer" (Lord have mercy -- we had some mighty poor seasons) and "In sickness and health" (we both knew "sickness") and "Until death do us part". Those were our promises to each other and our vows before God.....and they stuck in the good times and the bad times. I am saying.....tough times don't last...but tough people who have God as NUMERO UNO in the mix of literally everything that concerns them.....is what sustains, equips, and remains forever true.

My Sweetheart isn't here with me today, but those "Till There Was You" song words hold true. The bells are still ringing, the birds are still winging, and the music is still singing in this heart of mine. What was it that mattered most then? What is it that matters most today? The ONE common denominator -- God, Who blessed us with 44 years together on earth, and these 52 years, is still the ONE who blesses me today. He is the ONE who continues to "ring my bells", causes me to see birds winging and each day causes my heart to sing". Spending FOREVER with Him AND my Sweetheart will be awesome.....and FOREVER is a long, long time.

Wedding Memories Passed On

Awww -- more memories made last night! Payton and Lexi had never seen their Mom & Dad's Wedding Video. It was such a special celebration as Larry & Staci showed it to them. I'm so thrilled I could be a part of this treasured time. On the video (after they were married), Staci & Larry went to a recording studio and taped their purity story. Their "look" in 1997 made Alexia & Payton laugh so hard. That's the first photo here. Alexia with her usual style of quick comic relief, named her mom "Hair Girl" and her dad, "Suspenders Boy" -- LOL!

The next part of the video is the actual wedding. Of course, watching the wedding that began with beautiful worship music and singing, gave us such a sweet time of thanksgiving. Seeing precious people, like Larry's Mom, his grandparents, my Ron and his Dad, my Mom, sister and brother in law, and Pastor Billy Joe Daugherty in the video, are all, now Larry & Staci's cheerleaders from heaven's grandstands, brought tears to our eyes.

So many memories and miracles that occurred on that day -- February 7, 1997 -- winter wonderland on the inside, and snowing outside in Tulsa, OK. As they kissed at the end and walked out to Steven Curtis Chapman singing, "Great Adventure", Alexia exclaimed, "When I get married, I want to drive off in my Shelby Cobra with cans flopping behind us and a sign that said, 'Just Married' -- ended our celebration with joy and laughter once again. #SuchIsLifeWithLexi