How Beautiful are the Hands and Feet of Caregivers

Yesterday, I attended the funeral of Aunt Iris Litke, my father-in-law’s sister. After 68 years of marriage, her husband, Uncle Hugo preceded her to heaven. Their son, Art, and wife, Sharon and their son, Michael, were her caregivers. I’ve admired their strength yet tenderness in the care of this precious woman who struggled with tremendous health issues up to her passing. Hearing about their tender love and care for her made me want to reach out to my social media friends who are caregivers today and encourage you as you carry on faithfully in this beautiful ministry of caregiving. I totally believe you have the Father's heart of love and compassion.

I recognize that ministry. I was the caregiver to my precious Mama for many years and into her later years, her 24-7 caregiver. Then during my Sweetheart's illness, being his 24-7 caregiver. I watch my dear sis-in-law and her husband who welcomed my mother-in-law into their home and have given her 24/7 care. What that means is they don’t take vacations or even spend very many hours away from her. Believe me I’ve tried to step up but Mom insists on Karen being there. I get it. Her trust and security is enveloped in the devotion of her beloved daughter. Mom can only deal with a few hours without Karen’s undivided attention. I assure you -- these beautiful caregivers are living with no regrets. I know. I have no regrets in the care of my mom and my husband.

Caregiving should never feel like it's merely a duty or obligation. Caregiving can be welcomed into our hearts as a God-given ministry. It may be a hidden ministry that goes unnoticed by many, but it is a ministry that God sees and one that pleases Him. Jesus recognized its importance when He said, “Whoever helps one of these little ones because they are my followers will truly get his reward. He will get his reward even if he only gave my follower a cup of cold water.” Matthew 10:42.

As a caregiver, God will use your hands as an extension of His hands -- to hold, to support, to embrace, to comfort, to bless, to help, to heal. He will use your words— to encourage, to build up, to speak hope, to convey truth, to strengthen faith, to deepen trust, to impart love. He will use your presence— to show care, to bring companionship, to wipe a tear, to soothe a pain, to dispel a fear, to rub a brow, to kiss a cheek, to hold a hand, to fluff a pillow, to reassure when there’s a setback, to celebrate when progress is made. Those actions certainly do sound like the actions and character of God. God with skin on.

As His servants, the ministry of caregiving means that whatever it is we do to help another, even if it means the simple act of giving a glass of water, the Lord receives it as a ministry done unto Him. How blessed we are to be able to make God's heart glad as we touch others with His love. I can imagine He is giving you applause and a standing ovation for a "job well done"! In fact, He’s saying “Well done, good and faithful servants. Enter into my joy. You earned it. Receive it.”

It’s a Dog-Eat-Dog World Out There

That phrase is used to describe a situation in which people will do anything to be successful, even if what they do harms other people. We don't have to look far to see that phrase a reality. No matter the business or profession, it's clear that phrase is true.
But, how much more beneficial it is to be in a “Dog-Love-Dog” World – both in the canine species and the human species.

Who would have thought that some of my best “pals” these days are dogs. It comes with my territory and my family. There’s my grand-dogs: Buddy, the 75-pound Australian Shepherd and Emma, the 4-pound Yorkie, who, I happen to be their caregiver right now while their family is out of town. I get a kick out of throwing the ball to Buddy (with a ball-thrower or else slimy-ball would be the case) and he retrieves it often in one catch in the air. As soon as I walk in the door, he runs to the backdoor for our “play ball” time. Little Emma, who often seems the alpha-dog of the pair, incessantly yaps at me wanting her time with me. There’s Bentley, a 25-pound Havanese who belongs to my Austin family. I also have another grand-dog, rock-solid and gentle, 79-pound bulldog, Athena, belonging to Braden and Ruth. I smile as I write this post because I’m not what you would consider a dog-lover. I profess to be a dog-liker because they ALL belong to those people-lovers in my life.

I think God must have a special love and delight for those who care for his creation. Jesus seemed to be enamored by animals as He often referred to them as a source of praise to God and revelation of the nature of faith, humility and peace. When we see Jesus’ interactions with creatures, we can better understand how we are called to relate to other creatures.

We’ve all heard the saying “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks.” I never thought that the roles could be reversed and that my grand-dogs could teach ME some life-lessons in turning this world into a dog-love-dog world:

Lesson 1: Restrictions are Good. Once all these grand-dogs were kennel trained – it was a great option when the families were away or night-time sleeping. Believe me – we knew the damage done when my “young” daughter’s dog, Desi, was left behind, free in the house. She had separation anxiety and tore our door-blinds to shreds. Now, all my grand-dogs are more “mature” and it's "open to roam" home policy. But, like the restrictions placed on our furry friends, we, too, need restrictions that hold us to safe and peaceful living. Thank God for the Ten Commandments and Jesus’ new commandments “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul and mind….and your neighbor as yourself.” Those aren’t restrictions – they are freedom to love and be loved. What “dog” doesn’t want that?

Lesson 2 -- Bond with Others – When I lived a few months with my Frisco family, I would take Buddy for a morning walk. We would encounter dogs in fenced yards, barking like crazy and defending their territory. Buddy was leash trained, so he would look at them like “What is your problem?” I think, if he could talk, he’d tell those dogs “Let’s make love – not war!” As busy adults, it’s easy to get caught up in the day-to-day hustle and bustle, forgetting to make time for loved ones. Interaction with others can be a much-needed source of joy. We don't have to go it alone. Reaching out to a friend, or making a new friend, can truly make a difference in that other person’s life. And, spending time with others can be the first step on the path to making a difference in our lives.

Lesson 3: Run to Greet Those You Love; Hang Out with Those You Love -- There is something wonderful about coming home to those dogs so excited to see us. As soon as Buddy and Emma hear my car-door slam, they are at the front door barking and welcoming me home. Even sitting down, they just have to nudge in as close as they can to us. So why don’t we do this for each other? Appreciating the people we love and care about isn’t just something we feel, it’s also something we do. And what better way to show someone you care than by greeting them with a big hug or a kiss when they arrive home? And, what better way to show our love to someone, by getting as close as we can to them when we’re watching TV or just sitting down to relax. As adults, it’s easy to take our relationships for granted. But dogs know that every time you see someone you love can be just as exciting as the first. Remembering this can only strengthen our relationships.

Lesson 4: Live in the Moment -- Dogs don’t have some big master plan. They aren’t worried about the past, and aren’t terrified of the future. They live right here in the present moment. What a truly a joyous and positive way of living our life! Stop to smell the roses. Breathe in the fresh air. Put our phone down and fully experience where we are. Maybe we should stick our heads out the car window with the wind blowing in our faces to remind us to live in the present.

Thanks to our great Creator for creating some of our best friends and teachers and if we'd live in gratitude and love like them, then, for sure it would be a dog-love-dog world!

My Purpose Filled Life Comes Without a Drill Sergeant

I want to start off by saying I know God has always been with me -- even before my conception. Cheers to my mom and dad’s hardcore belief in life. I was an unexpected baby (not to God, but to mom and dad). It had been 12 years since their last child, but mom was in a trainwreck that upset her “apple cart”, rather, her birthing cart. All the biological factors came together and whoa-la, here came Donna Sue! At first, I wasn’t a welcomed surprise. Mom was older and done with being a baby manufacturer, but God wasn’t done and if she were alive, she’d tell you I was her blessing. We were besties, inseparable, and eventually, I became her caregiver.

Once mom grasped the notion that I was a blessing and not a curse, she loved me with all her heart. I was diagnosed with a heart murmur at birth and she prayed for my healing to live. Obviously her prayers were answered and obviously, God purposely planned my existence. He created a unique path for my life. He created a unique path for your life, too -- even before your conception. In Jeremiah 1:5, God said, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you..." If you are reading this blog, you are most likely a believer and lover of God and His Word, too. If you’re not, I pray this is the day you join me on the most remarkable journey of sweet assurance of OUR manufacturer and His purpose for our lives.

I wish I could say since I became a Christian at 8-years-old that I had completely understood God’s love for me. I wish I had always been on fire for Him and tight with Him, but, rather than “I wish I hads”, I am learning that's just not His requirements. Sometimes we see Him as a Drill Sergeant who requires a certain way to stand, act, dress, speak and "Oh, YES SIR! I promise to seek You more, read my Bible more. I'll get more involved. I'll reach out to others more!" But with all the ups and downs of life, those promises get a little watered-down. After all, we are just human, right? But what if it was for a different reason altogether?

What if the whole time we were trying so hard to draw into God, we were going about it the wrong way? We were making it a routine, a drill, a rigid, religious exercise that once we completed the tasks, we had completed our requirements, because, of course, that’s what a good Christian does…..right? But then one day, I realized God wasn’t my drill sergeant yelling at me to “Get up! Get going! Give me 10 (push-ups)!” I realized He shows up in the softness of a gentle breeze, or that big hug from a fellow believer or a worship song, or scripture that pops off the thin page of my Bible that was “right on” and what I needed for that day. That has been the ebb and flow that eventually got me to this day and time that pulled me into blogging and sharing my faith.

Now I am using the gifts HE has given me to glorify Him. I am able to understand what He is teaching me even more. I am confident when He says "yes" OR "no" to me because I know He has my best interests at heart. Now, out of my sweet relationship with the One Who loves me most, I want to serve Him. I want to read my Bible to find out more about Him and now read it in a way that sticks with me, sinks into my heart and sets me on my path and it may even be the catalyst for my next blog.

My relationship with Jesus has become radically different. It’s a built-in, 24-hour open-shop with Him. I just love HIm so much, I truly want, with all my heart to please Him out of a thankful heart. My thought life hinges on pleasing Him. “Forgive me, Lord, for thinking that!” “Thanks, God, for that advice.” It was sitting right there in front of me just waiting for me to discover the path that was made for me and embracing it. If you find yourself in a similar situation of wanting more from your relationship with God, don’t give up. You'll get there because He's always right there with you, for you and waiting for you. "Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me." Revelation 3:20

Are You a Caregiver? Then You Are His Hands Extended.

When I moved from Tulsa a year ago, I knew God was directing me back to my home state of Texas – closer to my children and grandchildren, yet still close enough to get back to Tulsa should I be needed by my sister-in-law in the care of Mom (my mother-in-law). I have felt like I abandoned ship because not long after I moved away, Mom needed more care. Fortunately, Karen and George have run their business out of Mom's home so Mom isn't alone very much. Also, they live only five minutes away from Mom. Of late, however, Mom has needed extra care which has put greater demands on my dear sis and bro.

I’m so thankful that God has given "super powers" to Karen and George -- His strength, patience, and guidance along the way. When Mom became nervous about driving, on her own, years ago, gave her car keys to Karen and said “I’m through with driving.” What a wonderful announcement that was. We didn’t have to make that decision for her. And, Karen told her years ago that when she’s ready to move from her home to theirs, she should just tell them and they’ll welcome her there. Sure enough, Mom recently declared “I’m ready to move to your house!” What a sweet relief to know she made that decision herself instead of being forced to move.

Since then, Karen and George have been making room for Mom by painting rooms, moving furniture out to make room for Mom's furniture, and adding fixtures to accommodate Mom's needs. Over the last several days, Karen and I have been cleaning out closets and storage spaces for Mom and decorating her beautiful, spacious room at their home.

We’re so thankful we have the privilege of treating Mom with so much dignity that she is in the driver’s seat, so to speak – getting to select the day and time for the move. But this dignity and care, has been ongoing for many years. My sis, Karen, truly has a servant's heart. She is so devoted to Mom, being on-call 24/7 to her call and so very patient, loving and kind. She takes her to many doctor's appointments, gives her daily care (and that's a lot) and shows her such unconditional love.

Witnessing these tender moments, made me want to reach out to my FB friends who are caregivers and encourage you with this beautiful ministry of care-giving. I believe you have the Father's heart of love and compassion.

I recognize that ministry. I was the caregiver to my precious Mama for many years and into her later years, her 24-7 caregiver. Then during my Sweetheart's illness, being his 24-7 caregiver.

Caregiving should never feel like it's merely a duty or obligation. Caregiving can be welcomed into our hearts as a God-given ministry. It may be a hidden ministry that goes unnoticed by many, but it is a ministry that God sees and one that pleases Him. Jesus recognized its importance when He said, “Whoever helps one of these little ones because they are my followers will truly get his reward. He will get his reward even if he only gave my follower a cup of cold water.” Matthew 10:42.

As a caregiver, God will use your hands as an extension of His hands—to hold, to support, to embrace, to comfort, to bless, to help, to heal; He will use your words— to encourage, to build up, to speak hope, to convey truth, to strengthen faith, to deepen trust, to impart love; He will use your presence— to show care, to bring companionship, to wipe a tear, to soothe a pain, to dispel a fear, to rub a brow, to kiss a check, to hold a hand, to fluff a pillow, to reassure when there’s a setback, to celebrate when progress is made. Those actions certainly do sound like the actions and character of God.

As His servants, the ministry of caregiving means that whatever it is we do to help another, even if it means the simple act of giving a glass of water, the Lord receives it as a ministry done unto Him. How blessed we are to be able to make God's heart glad as we touch others with His love. I can imagine He is giving you applause and a standing ovation for a "job well done"!

Billows of Love

“Billows” isn’t a word that I use in my everyday speech. But, yesterday, on my morning walk, I looked up at the sky and saw the clouds in billows. An old song that I heard my mama sing so many times came to my mind. “Peace, peace, wonderful peace, coming down from the Father above. Sweep over my spirit forever I pray, in fathomless BILLOWS of love.” And, right in the middle of those “billows” was the sun shining through. Of course, I had a “God” moment!

When I returned home, I headed to "Google" to be sure that I had “billows” in the right connotation, and sure enough, billows means a large mass of something, typically cloud, smoke, or steam. Aha! Billows of love and peace sweeping over my soul right in the middle of the storms I might be facing – love and peace that comes from the sun (the Son)!

It was such a sweet thought I had about my precious mother who – these many years later – I remember how she lived in God’s peace in the middle of tremendous chaos. My mom knew chaos. Her husband (my dad) was diagnosed with a brain tumor when I was eight years old. After the surgery to remove the tumor, my dad was never the same. He had many seizures that I witnessed as a young child that created chaos and fear in my young mind. There was no back-up plan for any potential of something happening to Dad, so my mom had to work long hours to supply for us. He passed away when I was fifteen. I watched Mom, throughout those years, to be in peace. I never saw her anguishing about her “lot in life”. I remember that she had to sell her wedding ring at a pawn shop to get enough money to help make ends meet. Maybe, I saw tears on that day, but she would rise up and sing “Peace, peace, wonderful peace, coming down from the Father above. Sweep over my spirit forever I pray, in fathomless billows of love.”

I, too, know that peace because of her example. I had my own times of chaos. I clung to the same peace during those times like my mama did. I’m in a 12-week Bible Study and this week’s lesson is “Out of Chaos; Into His Image”. I’d much rather ponder “peace” than “chaos” because chaos means “complete disorder and confusion”, turmoil, disruption, train wreck”. Train wreck? I read those words “train wreck” and I remembered my mom again. She could no longer have children and for that matter didn’t want any more since she already had three children of whom the youngest was 12. But she was in a train wreck and that “chaos” reorganized her insides and bada bing bada boom, I was conceived. At first it added “chaos” to her world, but she was so grateful for “her baby” because I was the one that would not only comfort her in her tough times, but, eventually, I was her caregiver. She had taught me well the way of peace. I was able to return the favor.

I have many dear friends in Puerto Rico who have lost everything in the disaster of Hurricane Maria. I have other friends and family going through tremendous storms and wonder if they’ll survive the chaos in their world. Maybe you are one of those that is suffering today for fear of what the future may hold for you because of the chaos all around you. Your own “train wreck” could be the catalyst for birthing new ideas, creativity, dreams coming true, and resurrection life.

Let’s turn the chaos into peace. Jesus did it when He spoke to the winds and waves, “Peace be still”. He’s given us the authority to speak to the winds and waves in our lives. May we all sing and pray with my Mom: “Peace, peace, wonderful peace, coming down from the Father above. Sweep over my spirit forever I pray, in fathomless billows of love.”

Psalm 29:11 “The LORD will give strength to His people; the LORD will bless His people with peace.”

These Two Gals With Me From the Start

Day 354 of Photo Inspirations -- These Two Gals With Me From the Start
Yesterday Mom (my mom-in-law) and Karen (my sis-in-law) had our little gift exchange before I head to Texas today.  These two gals are so dear to me. We've been together since the very beginning of the courtship of my sweetheart and I.  Mom was always for me.  She and my Mom were in cahoots as they prayed and conspired to help these two kids see the light about our "match made in heaven and on earth".

And, Karen, four years younger than her brother, would sit at our booth when we went to Kip's Big Boy Restaurant after Sunday night church.  Karen would snicker when she'd look under the table and see Ronnie and I holding hands.  

God blessed me with these precious women, who are not only my Mom and Sister (forget that whole "in law" thing), but have been my prayer partners, confidants, encouragers, loving caregivers, and dear friends for 54+ years. They've stood with me during the best of times and the worst of times. When I think of God's blessings....they are right up there at the top.

We were almost rolling from laughter when we were using my selfie stick to get the photo of the three of us.  Mom said, "I just love using that 'mirror'.  We've come a long way in photo technology since the start of our relationship.

For many years, one of my Christmas gifts to Mom is the "Photo Calendar" that I make for her.  I love to be "in the moment" in taking photos throughout the year for the main purpose of putting together her calendar.

Mom loved looking at each page of photos -- some that I pulled from the archives -- like the one of all Mom's grandkids and great grandkids playing her organ, as well as the one of Alexia and Madison in their princess dresses and Payton laughing hysterically at them.   Mom keeps the calendar in a prominent spot in her kitchen.

Before the two gals were ready to head home, we did what we've always done best together.....we prayed earnestly for each other, our families and friends, and for our country.  It was prayer that bound us together years ago and prayer that continues to bind us together today.

And those prayers have stood the test of time......we've seen so many answers to prayer, some of which weren't answered the way we wanted, but the answers came the way God wanted.  Father ALWAYS knows best.  

We'll continue to pray because, of all the uncertainties in this world, there is a CERTAINTY that is unfailing.....God HEARS and ANSWERS our prayers.

I'm so grateful that this beautiful time of the year gives us plenty of opportunities to be thankful for those things that matter most.....those things that money can't buy.....those things that we'll take to eternity with us.  

"For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints,  I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers."  Ephesians 1:15

A Love That Lasts a Lifetime

Day 291 of Photo Insprations -- A Love That Lasts a Lifetime
I had that kind of love with my sweetheart.  We were going to grow old together.  We were already planning a big famly vacation to celebrate our 50th which would have been in 2016.  But my Sweetheart slipped out of this "heaven on earth" to be in the REAL DEAL -- Heaven in Heaven.

So, when I see older couples so devoted to each other, still holding hands, seeing after each other, and still desperately in love with other -- it makes me so proud for them. I often think about "the way we were" and "the way we would have been", but it doesn't take away the sweetness I see in others.

This precious couple, Bob & Coreen Marson, attend my church and if ever there was an example of devotion and love, these two have it.  They've been married 60 years next month.  Bob is Coreen's caregiver.  Several years ago she was diagnosed with dementia, but It only seems to have progressed to not knowing her numbers and some people.  If you didn't know them, you wouldn't know there were any issues at all. I think that's what Bob's tender loving care has done for her.  I see such love in her eyes; she's always smiling, and she loves it when we hug her.  She'll nestle her sweet head right into your shoulder.  And, Bob gives 100% care to her and he does all the cooking -- and that's a really good thing.  He was always the best cook as he handled all the pancake breakfasts, special events and meals by our Men's Ministries group.  He also helps get her dressed  and makes sure all her needs are met.

That's the way they covenanted together 60+ years ago.  For better or worse; in sickness and in health.  A love that has lasted all these years.  I heard someone once say "“Love is not a matter of counting the years, but making the years count.”  And they've done that.  I called Bob to tell him I was writing a blog about them and he told me the secret to their many years together was they have never gone to bed until they've resolved any issues they had.  He said, "It's sure good to get up in the morning and not have any thing wrong between us.  It's just so great to have a clean slate to start a new day together."  

Bob and Coreen have been through thick and thin together; they’ve weathered their share of arguments. It can’t always have been easy, but then, neither life nor love are!   Sticking together, even through the rough patches is a test of character and of the strength of their love.

I agree with the physician that once said, "The best medicine for humans is love." Someone asked. "What if it doesn't work?" He smiled and said, "Increase the dose."

Are You a Caregiver? Then You Are Being Used By God.

Yesterday, I watched a dear friend whisper into her sweet Mama's ear "I love you. Thank you", and I watched her stroke her hair and tenderly kiss her on the cheek. This precious Mama is transitioning from this earth home to her heavenly home. But this care, she was being given today, has been ongoing for many years. Witnessing these tender moments, made me want to reach out to my FB friends who are caregivers today and encourage you with this beautiful ministry of caregiving. I totally believe you have the Father's heart of love and compassion.

I recognize that ministry. I was the caregiver to my precious Mama for many years and into her later years, her 24-7 caregiver. Then during my Sweetheart's illness, being his 24-7 caregiver.

Caregiving should never feel like it's merely a duty or obligation. Caregiving can be welcomed into our hearts as a God-given ministry. It may be a hidden ministry that goes unnoticed by many, but it is a ministry that God sees and one that pleases Him. Jesus recognized its importance when He said, “Whoever helps one of these little ones because they are my followers will truly get his reward. He will get his reward even if he only gave my follower a cup of cold water.” Matthew 10:42.

As a caregiver, God will use your hands as an extension of His hands—to hold, to support, to embrace, to comfort, to bless, to help, to heal; He will use your words— to encourage, to build up, to speak hope, to convey truth, to strengthen faith, to deepen trust, to impart love; He will use your presence— to show care, to bring companionship, to wipe a tear, to soothe a pain, to dispel a fear, to rub a brow, to kiss a check, to hold a hand, to fluff a pillow, to reassure when there’s a setback, to celebrate when progress is made. Those actions certainly do sound like the actions and character of God.

As His servants, the ministry of caregiving means that whatever it is we do to help another, even if it means the simple act of giving a glass of water, the Lord receives it as a ministry done unto Him. How blessed we are to be able to make God's heart glad as we touch others with His love. I can imagine He is giving you applause and a standing ovation for a "job well done"!