Peace in the Middle of the Usual Being Unusual

When our children marry and have families of their own we may have to do a lot of tweaking to adapt to their lifestyles and their way of doing things differently than what we did. It comes with the territory of being the "senior" in the bunch. So, rather than resisting the changes, I've decided to take hold of them and own them. Actually, I've become quite savvy at accepting change and doing my best to create moments right in the middle of it.

This year's "usual" was seriously "unusual" in just about every way, as we spent most of our Christmas moments on the go -- packing boxes, looking for a new downsized home for my kids which meant lots of giving items away, donating many items to charity and Craigs List for others. We squeezed in as many moments as we could to celebrate the birth of our Lord -- at church, in prayers together, in our entire family sharing and hearing the Christmas Story together via technology -- and so many moments of thankgiving and gratitude.

Last year I started a new tradition from my typical Christmas gift- buying frenzy. I picked up where Granny and Papaw left off and changed to giving money gifts. It was a great relief! So that was my plan – an envelope with $$ and a little momento that represents my heart to them. Last year it was a cardinal Christmas ornament to each one which represented Papa being still with us in our hearts.

I knew my theme this year would be about the sweet PEACE that has pervaded my life for so many years -- especially since the passing of my beloved husband. I added personalized words to each of my 11 kids and grandkids, but this excerpt was the same for everyone. I want them to know this "peace that passes understanding". I share this excerpt with you so that you will know the peace I desire to pay forward to the loves in my life -- which include YOU! .

My beloved ______
Peace be with You! This little PEACE plaque is just for YOU! It’s not just a Christmas gift. I give it to you today so you will find a place where you will see it often and be reminded that whatever is going on in your world, on any day or time, God’s peace is right there with you, if you’ll take it. This is my gift and my prayer for you every day of your life. That you would know where and Who to go to any time and any day for peace. Peace is my favorite place and favorite word EVER. That’s because I know that’s where God is. He waits for me and I go to Him there when things aren’t too peaceful around me. THERE is anywhere we choose to be – because God is everywhere. Here is an acronym of what peace is to me:

~ P – my PRECIOUS, POWERFUL and PASSIONATE PLACE where I spend time in Jesus’ PRESENCE. Where He blesses me with so much love, hope and joy.
~ E – my ESSENTIAL, EXCITING, place of ENJOYING Jesus’ PRESENCE. I am ENERGIZED every time I spend time there.
~ A – my AWESOME, AMAZING, ALWAYS ACCESSIBLE place of Jesus’ PRESENCE.
~ C – my CLOSE CONNECTION with Jesus where I am COMFORTED and CONSUMED with His great love and peace for me.
~ E – my sweet spot where I can EXHALE all negative, ugly, scary worries and be ENRICHED and ENVELOPED in an ENVIRONMENT of ENDEARING love and peace.

Good-bye 2019. Welcome 2020! We’re ready for the best, most PEACEFUL year ever! Your Adoring and Loving Mom aka Nana who loves you so, so much!
“You will keep in perfect peace all whose mind is stayed on You!” Isaiah 26:3

My Christmas Cardinals

After I had my moment of gifting my envelopes and sharing my heart with the family, my daughter remarked: “After all our gifts were opened with excitement and lots of silliness and laughter and oohs and aahs mixed in, It was always Papaw or Papa who reeled us back to the sweet and tenderness of what Christmas is all about. Now Nana is carrying it on for us. Thank you, Nana!” I knew that the changes I made were worth the effort.

As we “mature” we start to tweak some of our traditions and make accommodations for new ones. It comes with the territory of “Senior”! Rather than resisting the changes, I decided to take hold of them and embrace them. It seems “change” has been my life since the passing of my sweetheart eight years ago. I’ve become quite savvy at accepting change and doing my best to create moments right in the middle of it.

This was my year to make changes to my typical Christmas gift buying frenzy and transition to money envelopes as Papa and Granny did. What a relief it was instead of trying to find a gift that could be used or even wanted plus trying to keep within my budget where I wanted to always ensure spending the same amount for everyone. So that was my plan – an envelope with $$. But that plan became one of sweet sentimentality when I saw a little cardinal on a rooftop ornament and I thought about the object lessons of cardinals that have blessed me so much. It was a “kiss” from heaven that I could pass along. I bought 12 of those little ornaments.

Cardinals would be my theme for this year’s giving. I wasn’t even looking for a box when I found this one with Cardinals on it and I knew it would hold my gift bags that held the ornament and the envelope as well as a letter of explanation and Cardinal photo. One box went to my Austin family (that I hid under their tree when I was with them two weeks ago) and another box made its debut to my Frisco family on Christmas Eve. I share a portion of my letter with you:

Merry Christmas to My Precious Family…………………..
Of course, you know how much I miss Papa, and I know you do, too. I really try to keep his memory alive and it does stay alive when you all are worshiping God, playing and singing your hearts out, laughing, having family fun AND, of course, fishing.
This year’s theme is the “Visiting Cardinal”. I remember at my home in Tulsa, when, one morning I opened up the shades in my bedroom and there, perched on the fence was a beautiful Cardinal. And inside the bush were a mama and her babies. The Cardinal is said to symbolize hope, joy, health, rejuvenation, and celebration -- especially for those who choose to hold the Cardinal dear. It's said you're a special type of person who is willing to care for those in need, if you love the Cardinals. I love the Cardinals! On the day that the Cardinal appeared in my backyard, and many times since, I feel like it is a kiss from heaven to me. I like to think that my daddy, mama, grandparents AND, most of all, your Papa is sending me kisses from heaven, too and cheering us on.

I'm using the Cardinal as an object lesson to remind us to look for signs that remind us of sweet times, precious people and wonderful memories. I'm in good company in doing so. Jesus was the grandest storyteller using object lessons. He often used the objects at hand around Him to teach people about God and His Kingdom. When He was by a well, He used water. After He fed 5,000 people, He taught them about the Bread of Life. When He was on a fishing boat, He said the Kingdom was like a fishing net. He told His listeners to consider the lilies, the sparrows, and the hairs on their head. When He said, consider the sparrows, there were probably sparrows flying around. When He taught the parable of the sower, there probably was a sower in the next field where He was teaching. Jesus asked the disciples to remember Him as they took bread and wine at the Last Supper. The Bible is filled with visible reminders of God’s constant communication and connection with His people.

So WHY wouldn't we see a Cardinal and think of hope, joy, and celebration AND sweet loved ones that could just be sending their love to us in the most beautiful way? So, I’ve given each of you a little Cardinal to remind you of Papa and grandparents who are cheering you on from heaven. If one happens to show up in your yard, then remember to look up to heaven and say, “Thanks, God! I needed that. Hi Papa! Keep praying for me! I promise to catch up with you one day!”

This was my subtle way of keeping Papa alive, giving Jesus the credit for it all and, hopefully, leaving a lasting impression of Nana’s Christmas message! Now I’m already thinking about what next year’s theme will be because you’d better believe – I want to leave footprints and handprints of the ONE that Christmas and EVERYDAY is all about!

Merry Christmas Eve!

Day 359 of Photo Inspirations -- Merry Christmas Eve!!
We're getting closer to "Silent Night -- Holy Night", but until then...this day is probably filled with lots of activity for us all -- last minute shopping, wrapping the final packages, and getting some of our Christmas meal ready to go for tomorrow.  As for us, after two more Christmas productions that the kids are in today, we'll settle down for our Christmas Eve traditions.  When these two grandkids wake up tomorrow morning, I will have arrived in Seattle after a early morning flight to celebrate Christmas Day with my family there.  I'll wave at Santa enroute, as we'll probably be crossing paths in the air.

What a treat it was last night, to see my sweet cousins, Mary Ellen Snow and Charles at the production.  Of course, I had to have a quick photo opt.  They just recently moved to Texas from OK and are loving being in Texas near their kids.

We came home and watched a sweet Christmas movie and then the kids got to open their gifts from Nana.   Sweet, hilarious time of making memories for another year.  By the way, notice a jigsaw puzzle that we're working on.  That's another annual tradition. Sweet, sweet times.

Yes, the traditions and festivities are so enjoyable, but rolling out the red carpet and recognizing the Guest of Honor is what this awe-inspiring season is all about. And.....it's up to us to ensure the Honoree is positioned in His rightful place of distinction.

I love the story of St. Nicholas. He was a very kind man and had a reputation for helping the poor and giving secret gifts to people who needed it. And that story inspires us all with a heart of giving. St. Nicholas is where "Santa Claus" came from. But, as sweet as those "treasured" photos of Santa Claus with our little ones are, and seeing their little eyes sparkling with wonder, and putting cookies out for this jolly old soul to pay us a visit, Santa ISN'T the "Guest of Honor".

The leading characters of the Christmas Story are Mary, Joseph, the shepherds, the angels, and, of course, the Headliner, the main attraction and the Star of the Show is Jesus Christ. He is the REASON for the celebrations and He should be the Guest of Honor at each one. I love that we have a role to play in this great story, too. Perhaps we can be one of the shepherds. We don't need eloquent words and we don't need a place of prominence or status. We just need to be bearers and sharers of "the good news of great joy".

People expect pastors and priests to talk about Christmas being about Christ. But what people need are shepherds of the world to teach and preach that message.

You and I have the ability to amaze someone today with the message of Christmas. "For God so loved the world He GAVE His one and only Son."  (John 3:16)

Even Santa bows down to Him as the Guest of Honor.

I pray that the awesome richness of this gift is experienced in the lives of you and your precious families -- that makes this a Christmas to remember. Much love and MERRY CHRISTMAS, one and all!

I Breathed a Sign of Relief

Day 355 of Photo Inspirations -- I Breathed a Sigh of Relief
In years past, my Christmas traditions started right after Thanksgiving.  I loved this time of the year so much that  I decorated every bedroom with it's own fully decorated, lit tree.  The inside and outside of the house looked like a Christmas Store.  I had several nativity sets throughout my house....after all -- I wanted Jesus to be prominent amidst all the Santa Clauses and snowmen.  I had a huge village of little houses and ice skating pond, trees, churches (lots of churches).  I made dozens of cookies and candies to share with family and friends.  I handwrote and mailed a flood of Christmas cards with my family's picture on it.  That was a "must do" every year -- getting the family Christmas picture at Thanksgiving.  I purchased way too many gifts.  I spent hours and hours shopping for just the right treasures to give.   Despite my best intentions to make Christ the center of our Christmas, hper mode was my mode of operation for years.

I never felt guilty about the flood of activity and way-too-much-attention to so many details. I loved this time of year so much that I gave it ALL I had.  The family traditions were so dear and precious to me. It was a work-out, but at the end -- we had made so many precious memories, and it was worth every effort.  But, today, my story takes a big turn.   Now I realize -- finding balance is the real key to having a very, merry Christmas.

Being in this "single" phase of life, it's a lot easier to simplify.   And, that's what I did this year. I have been determined to keep the focus on Jesus' birthday.  Yesterday, I made my way to Texas to celebrate with my family here for a few days before heading to my Washington family.  I'm breathing a sigh of relief -- shopping and baking and decorating is all done.   Because I had only 4 hours of sleep the night before, while the kids were at their Christmas program rehearsals, I snuck away to take a little nap.  I'm in that sweet season of life that I get to do that!     All the hustle and bustle has ended, and  now I can lean in to the real sweetness and tenderness of this season.  The principle thing is finding balance and spotlighting the STAR of the story.

If you've been like me -- whether in an utter frenzy-mode to this point, or we have taken a more laid back approach this year -- we can still live a guilt-free Christmas.  We really have nothing to prove to anyone, because we're already approved by Christ.  And, since it's His birthday.....we get to just show up and celebrate Him.  No matter how we decorate the house for His party, it is still ALL ABOUT HIM, Who is ALWAYS the life of the party.   And He has come to give life to all the people at the party.  And, when we lean in even closer, we'll find that the LIFE of the party holds out Himself as the gift that keeps on giving.  And the gift tag?    It has our name on it.  Oh, what a relief it is!
“See, I have written your name on the palms of my hands.” ~ Isaiah 49:16

God With Us

Since a child, I always loved the sweet and tender atmosphere of Christmas. I’m still captivated by the beauty of all the faith, friends and family traditions we enjoyed -- precious times -- laughter, joy, and making lots of  memories.

But those times are past -- just momentary -- so what consolation and reassurance we have, in knowing that the incredible GIFT of the baby in the manger, is still here, RIGHT NOW, because He is Emmanuel, 'God With Us'!   For me, that means I am never alone, because God is with me. I sense Him in the peaceful times in my mornings, as I read His Word and in times of prayer…..but, even more so, I know He is with me even in the many activities and responsibilities of my day.

GOD WITH US -- not out of touch or out of reach and certainly not just a legend or myth.  He is GOD WITH US and He is LOVE.   Love breathing, love giving, love caring, love dying. Walking where we walk, knowing how we feel, knowing our pain, knowing our disappointments, bearing our sorrows.

GOD WITH US -- at work, during play, during mealtime, in the car, washing dishes, hurrying to work, relaxing on the sofa, at church, teaching our children, in good times and bad.  God with us.

I purpose to live my days knowing that God is with me, just like anyone that would be a passenger in my car, or a guest at my dinner table…..I talk to Him.   I talk to Him about any, and everything. I thank Him for the “favors” that come, like green lights, the really close parking space that we had yesterday at the mall, the “bargains” that we found.   I’ve found that, because I stay close to Him throughout my days, when the times of unexpected challenges come, I simply remember, I’m not facing anything alone, because God is with me.  I feel His peace right away, and I know He will bring about what’s best for me. I urge you to KNOW Him – to know Emmanuel – God is with me.  God is with you.  GOD WITH US.

Christmas Traditions Continue.....With Technology

What precious joys and delights I've had with my sweet kids here in Washington!

All four of our boys have been home and we've savored every moment

-- from enjoying the sight and sounds of downtown Seattle, Pike's Place Market, RN-74,

visit to see Santa,

indulging Nana by seeing "Annie" (yes, all 7 of us (big & little boys and their Mom & Dad -- all in a row) -- "Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love ya' tomorrow!", Christmas Eve at City Church

 and then home for Family Skyping with the Wallace's. 

Brennan had worked diligently on an amazing Power Point Presentation describing his "take" on presents and sharing, and the true meaning of Christmas,

Payton & Alexia's song,

 then the highlight every year is our Christmas story read by Uncle Ryan. This year's story was even better as it was spontaneously accentuated with props -- both families used the characters from their nativity sets to demonstrate the story. 

We sang. We laughed. We prayed together. Traditions continue....just in a new and high tech way -- so thankful to be alive in this day and time to experience leading edge technology -- sure makes the distance seem not so distant and separated after all. Blessed. Blessed. Blessed. Thankful. Thankful. Thankful.

The "You Are Special" Plate of Building Love and Confidence

It's "Special Plate" day for my special son, Ryan! It's his birthday! Everyone gets to tell him how special he is to them! I love what he shares here about their family tradition of "The Special Plate"! Maybe it's time you and your family have special plate days, too! It is sure a confidence builder to those we love!

"People often ask me “How do you do it?” How do I spend so much focused time with my family, at work, training for marathons and with philanthropic causes and still manage to make the time high value and high quality? As I’ve talked about in a previous blog, it is all about living with purpose.

We tend to live in a microwave and fast-food society where we want everything immediately and as cheap as possible. But throughout my life I’ve found that enduring results and reward actually come through consistently doing the right thing with consistency over a long period of time. A good family friend, Tommy Thompson, said to me when our eldest son, Braden, was just 6 years old, “You can never really have quality time with your children unless you have quantity time with them, because you never know when the quality moments will sneak up on you.” There is nothing fast or microwaveable about that.

Early on in our sons’ lives, I decided as a father it was going to be important to establish traditions that could be carried through each of our children’s lives and then be passed down through generations. These traditions would build character, intelligence, values and a heritage. The traditions would also foster a high degree of self-worth and create precious moments with our children.

This is the first of a series of blogs that talks about these different traditions my wife, Shawntel, and I have developed and why I believe they have had a positive impact on our children’s lives and our own as parents.

We have a special red plate that says, “You are special today.” It has become a great symbol in our household. This red plate is placed where our sons sit at the table on days we feel are special or significant for them – it can be a birthday, a graduation, special sporting event or accomplishment, or it could even be the day of a doctor’s appointment. When one of our boys is going to be celebrated, he comes to the table and see the plate in his spot. Immediately, a smile brightens his face because he knows that this morning is his morning. He will get his favorite breakfast and everyone in the family will take a turn telling him why he is special to them. Watching our youngest son wait in anticipation as his older brothers talk about how he is important, valued and unique, creates a sense of happiness, confidence and great worth in him. These moments cannot be replaced or overvalued. Even my wife, Shawntel, and I have come to be excited when we see the red plate at our spot on the table. There is rarely a red plate day without tears of joy.

As a parent, it is vitally important to develop habits that will keep you on purpose with your children. The red plate is an easy way for us to focus on the accomplishments and joys of each of our uniquely special children. Over the years, I passed this tradition on to many of my friends and family. They now use it as their own and it has been so rewarding to hear their positive stories that accompany this new tradition that has been established in their family. This tradition has created such incredible reward for both our children and for us as parents throughout the years.